New Beginnings

gwoppin

Don Juan
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Currently
-27 years old, in and out of smoking both tobacco and weed
-I owe £2000-£3000 ish
-In and out of work
-Just got laid off from job as general labourer
-Lost all of my gains, im scrawny and gross again
-Pretty poor hygiene (embarrassing to admit)


But at one point i felt on top of the world!
-Working 3 jobs, crypto trading, selling art
-Was absolutely RIPPED
-Started learning game and how to talk to people
-Cared a lot how i presented, etc


What is the point in this post?
-To have the support and advice as i progress
-Hopefully find others in a similar situation
-Let you guys read about my failings so you can feel better about your own selves not sucking as much as i currently do


Who i want to become
- Aesthetic, athletic and ripped as fuark (again)
- Great social skills, smoothest guy around
- Skilled illusionist
- £ Money Man £


First Goals
- Back in great shape, strong, chiselled and masculine frame
- Steady, consistent, well paying job
- Consistently hygiene routine
- Complete electrician course


Thank you guys for reading, some encouragement or general advice would be great
 
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How did you get from your previous situation into the current situation? Depression?
 

gwoppin

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How did you get from your previous situation into the current situation? Depression?
A mix of things:
(Around 2 years ago)

Got too comfortable with a woman. I had what i needed: weed, sex and the support from her, but it wasnt serious relationship.

Left my main job to pursue my side job as a carpentry apprentice full time, but after 6 months or so, that fell through. The guy i was apprenticing under moved far away and i couldnt afford college, etc.

Then slowly overtime just... Moped around and felt sorry for myself... I think? VERY poor mental health, just lost all motivation to do anything properly.

Any advice how to get the ball rolling again and not stop this time?
 
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Any advice how to get the ball rolling again and not stop this time?
Work on yourself without outcome dependency. Live without expectations.

For instance, I wrote a suspense fiction novel because I had this story in my head that I had to get out. I wasn't even thinking about letting other people read it until they expressed a desire to do so. I finished the novel before I started looking into getting feedback on my work. I've published five books and four short stories, but I still write because that is how I prefer to tell stories.

When I got divorced (or rather, abandoned when I was sick), I had a lot of negative emotions I didn't want to put in my stories, so I wrote them down like notes that turned into 'poetry', but I didn't turn my poetry into collections. Instead I took photos of the typewritten poems with the typewriter I composed them on, and put that on Instagram. People read my poetry and wrote me to say how much my poems resonated with them. An organiser for Spoken Word performances liked my poetry and invited me to read them at his events. That kind of snowballed in directions I never aimed for.
 

gwoppin

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Work on yourself without outcome dependency. Live without expectations.

For instance, I wrote a suspense fiction novel because I had this story in my head that I had to get out. I wasn't even thinking about letting other people read it until they expressed a desire to do so. I finished the novel before I started looking into getting feedback on my work. I've published five books and four short stories, but I still write because that is how I prefer to tell stories.

When I got divorced (or rather, abandoned when I was sick), I had a lot of negative emotions I didn't want to put in my stories, so I wrote them down like notes that turned into 'poetry', but I didn't turn my poetry into collections. Instead I took photos of the typewritten poems with the typewriter I composed them on, and put that on Instagram. People read my poetry and wrote me to say how much my poems resonated with them. An organiser for Spoken Word performances liked my poetry and invited me to read them at his events. That kind of snowballed in directions I never aimed for.
I will keep that in mind, its wild which ways and directions seemingly small things can lead to.

Do you have a link to your books?
 

gwoppin

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Fwiw, in the US, a union electrician makes more money than most bachelor's degrees.
Theres a lot of potential for money here in London too, but im not sure if its ADHD or something else but i struggle with studying / focusing, so thats really holding me back
 

holidayad_

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But at one point i felt on top of the world!
-Working 3 jobs, crypto trading, selling art
You said you used to sell your art. Keep going. It can help you psychologically and financially. I'd bet on it as a side hustle and see where it takes me. You might be able to establish yourself in an interesting network of contacts, with art galleries or other spaces, and take off from there.

What kind of art, by the way? Painting, sculpture, crafts?
 
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Lay off the weed and the tobacco. Both undercut your goal of restoring your health
And if you can't readily, at least switch to vapourising pure cannabis.
I take Bedrocan six times a day, I know what I'm talking about.
 

TheGambino

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The question is; what your going to do about it to change your situation and how consistent and disciplined are you towards your goals?

Go get it!
 

FlirtLife

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- Steady, consistent, well paying job
- Complete electrician course
Left my main job to pursue my side job as a carpentry apprentice full time, but after 6 months or so, that fell through.
Would it be easier to complete your training as a carpenter, rather than start over from scratch as an electrician?

In the U.S., electricians have a median 60k salary versus 51k for carpenters (2022 data)
 

eli77

Master Don Juan
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We have all been there in high school college or in the real world places like this in your library or good pictures to start to help find yourself get better grooming habits and build your confidence.
 

gwoppin

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You said you used to sell your art. Keep going. It can help you psychologically and financially. I'd bet on it as a side hustle and see where it takes me. You might be able to establish yourself in an interesting network of contacts, with art galleries or other spaces, and take off from there.

What kind of art, by the way? Painting, sculpture, crafts?
I used to make custom Nike sneakers, which gained a lot of attention and i noticed it would be something that also brought me some attention in social settings, which was a very nice and new experience for me.

I stopped for a few reasons, but have always wanted to pick that back up. Writing this out now, i realise that fear of success was one of them.

Since diving deep into illusions and magic, it has given me a big spark of ideas of other types of art / business i can do with designing playing cards, digital art, learning how to market and sell them, etc. (Waiting to get my iPad fixed to start designing)

Thanks a lot for this reply, i will definitely be seriously reconsidering this avenue again!!
 

gwoppin

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Lay off the weed and the tobacco. Both undercut your goal of restoring your health
I stopped smoking weed for about 6 months (since January) but ended up having a 2-3 week long binge.

Previously i had also stopped smoking tobacco, until i started being around all of the smokers at work. I finished the last pack of Marlboros last night, and hopefully that will be the end of that.

Thanks for the reply, seeing these words from somebody other than myself to myself is a nice boost
 

gwoppin

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The question is; what your going to do about it to change your situation and how consistent and disciplined are you towards your goals?

Go get it!
This seems to be the issue, is the lack of discipline and consistency!!

That's why i made this thread, to help keep me accountable, i'd feel like a prick to take all of this free advice and do nothing with it.

I appreciate the encouragement!
 

gwoppin

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Would it be easier to complete your training as a carpenter, rather than start over from scratch as an electrician?

In the U.S., electricians have a median 60k salary versus 51k for carpenters (2022 data)
Its been about 2 years since i havent been doing carpentry, so my skills are pretty much back down to zero.

Also, after experiencing carpentry and labouring, general construction type work, realistically i dont see myself being able to do it consistently long term, it is far too physically demanding, especially as i get older. (I have scoliosis, and after a particularly heavy shift it causes all sorts of problems.)
 

gwoppin

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After a couple days of sitting with my thoughts and mentally preparing to make some steps, todays agenda:

- Haircut
- Apply for jobs
- Keep the smoking down
- Keep the hygiene up

Then tonight having drinks and hooking up with somebody. Its been about a year since id last slept with anybody, and i swear my virginity has somehow grown back. (This is the same woman id last slept with, we have recently reconnected.)

@holidayad_ Do you have any experience when it comes to selling art? I already have plenty of ideas but im curious on your input, thanks!
 

gwoppin

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Today went well:
- Haircut complete
- Job application complete
- Kept tobacco consumption minimal
- Hygiene up

I applied for a part time position at McDonald's, which would provide me with:
- Enough time and money to push forward with my art business
- Better ability to train as it wont be physically taxing
- Within walking distance, so saving money on travel expenses
- Enough free time to study for college and to pursue my hobby of illusions / magic

Hookup bailed on me, but no stress, it just motivated me more to do the right things today.

Hope you all had a great day too, be proud of your baby steps!!
 
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