Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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new and needs help.

smeckle

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I've been reading posts on this forum for a while now, and never posted before. Before now, that is.

I recently started dating a wonderful girl, and I couldn't be happier. But, there is one little snag.

She dropped a comment the other night about how I can't (read: won't) talk about how I feel about her.

She knows that I care about her, I've told her. I've told her how I felt, but apparently I didn't do it right?

Granted, I'm fairly new to the bf/gf thing (haven't dated much), but I really don't want to eff this up.

If I were in love with her, it would be as simple as telling her that I loved her. But I'm not. So... I don't really know how.

Any help at all would be greatly appreciated gentlemen. I've read your posts before, and most of you are pretty smart. So, I'd like to hear what you have to say.

Feel free to ask any questions. Thanks guys!
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Juanito

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smeckle said:
I've been reading posts on this forum for a while now, and never posted before. Before now, that is.

I recently started dating a wonderful girl, and I couldn't be happier. But, there is one little snag.

She dropped a comment the other night about how I can't (read: won't) talk about how I feel about her.

She knows that I care about her, I've told her. I've told her how I felt, but apparently I didn't do it right?

Granted, I'm fairly new to the bf/gf thing (haven't dated much), but I really don't want to eff this up.

If I were in love with her, it would be as simple as telling her that I loved her. But I'm not. So... I don't really know how.

Any help at all would be greatly appreciated gentlemen. I've read your posts before, and most of you are pretty smart. So, I'd like to hear what you have to say.

Feel free to ask any questions. Thanks guys!
congrats on ur success with ur wonderful girl!

dont worry too much about how to express your inner feelings to ur GF

just dont tell her that you love her...

if you really wanna express your love towards her, do it with your body through action, not words (eg kiss her, caress her...etc)
 

cactus3178

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Couple questions, captain:

1.) How long have you guys been together?

2.) Is she implying that she wants to hear the 'L' word? Has she said that to you?

Really, if the issue is that your not in love with her, you should let her know. Personally, I can't f*cking stand it when peeps who are a whopping 2-3 months in are saying that sh*t.

People don't have respect for that word. Real love is somehting that takes a long time to develop, ya know? People constantly confuse infatuation with love.

Be honest. If you like her, tell her. Like the bro above said, show her through your actions......just don't say anything you don't really feel.

Good luck.
 

blinkwatt

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Try this is worked for me to shut the lady up. My lady friend asked "what are you thinking" as I layed on top of her and I responded with "actions speak louder then words" and kissed her and made out. Next time she ask "how do you feel about me" respond with "actions speak louder then words" and kiss her like there is no tommorow.
 

Swagger

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what i do in those situations is to tell her: "Look, i like you. I really do. And I would love to fall in love with you sometime. I'm looking forward to it but it's gonna take it's time"

something like that should do it. in your own words. because you let her know that you do care about her but also, that she needs to keep putting in work to get you to love her.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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smeckle

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Thanks for the responses guys. I appreciate it.

To answer cactus's questions...

1) This thrusday, we'll have hit a month.
2) No. Neither of us are in love, so that's what I don't get.

This kid at her school (she's a senior in high school) wrote her a love poem. And that's what brought it up. We started talking about that and she dropped the bomb.

But I've been showing her as much as I can how I feel, and it seems to be working. Thanks guys.

Anything else?
 
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