nervousness?

[picard]

Does anyone have problem with nervousness in new situations? I frequently feel nervous hence I stutter when speaking to people in new stressful situations such as dating, job related meetings, social functions etc... I develop high anxiety about it.

 

[penkitten]

lots of people do that. i have before.
sooner or later it goes away .

 

[picard]

lots of people do that. i have before.
sooner or later it goes away .

how long did your nervousness goes away? 2-3yrs? I had this problem for over a decade. It was much worse when I was in highschool. I couldn't recite poetry in English class due to my nervous problem.

 

[PrimetimeDeliverance]

You are captain Jean - Luc Picard of the USS Enterprise, when it comes to dating you of all people should have no issues:

i recommend opening with a set about your childhood days dreaming of your future in the vineyards of France.
perhaps if things become a little heated, you can discuss the vaunted Picard maneuvre.
when you've really got her hooked, that Borg implanted p3nis will not let you down sir.

MAKE IT SO

 

[Jimbo2k]

You are captain Jean - Luc Picard of the USS Enterprise, when it comes to dating you of all people should have no issues:

i recommend opening with a set about your childhood days dreaming of your future in the vineyards of France.
perhaps if things become a little heated, you can discuss the vaunted Picard maneuvre.
when you've really got her hooked, that Borg implanted p3nis will not let you down sir.

MAKE IT SO

You are creepy.


Picard, just keep improving yourself, never stop. Sooner or later the confidence you want will come to you.

 

[NoNickname]

Does anyone have problem with nervousness in new situations? I frequently feel nervous hence I stutter when speaking to people in new stressful situations such as dating, job related meetings, social functions etc... I develop high anxiety about it.

Keep on doing things that make you nervous, and sooner or later, the things that made you a little nervous, wont make you nervous at all; the things that made you more nervous, will only make you a little nervous. Keep this going, and your nervousness won't appear that often. In the end, there should scarcely be any more of it(nervousness) left.

 

[picard]

You are captain Jean - Luc Picard of the USS Enterprise, when it comes to dating you of all people should have no issues:

i recommend opening with a set about your childhood days dreaming of your future in the vineyards of France.
perhaps if things become a little heated, you can discuss the vaunted Picard maneuvre.
when you've really got her hooked, that Borg implanted p3nis will not let you down sir.

MAKE IT SO

I like your style ! I should tell people that line when I am nervous. :crackup: :crackup:

 

[reyalp]

oddly enough, the boot camp should be pretty good at ridding you of this. just surround yourself with people and force yourself into public situations where you're put on the spot.

remember your goal. your goal is to be comfortable in new or stressful situations. can you imagine yourself walking up to a girl, and everything going perfectly smooth? can you imagine yourself in a meeting, and making the perfect presentation?
visualize that as much as possible, and keep trying until it happens.
when i was diving, i learned to just imagine myself slicing into the water like a hot knife into butter when i was getting ready to dive. i had to do it so i wouldn't be nervous. instead of thinking about everything that could go wrong, i was thinking about the perfect dive. it was the only thing that could keep my mind off of the possibilities of the outcome of my dive. the results spoke for themselves. my uncle told me once "i could inch my way into a pool and still make more of a splash than you do when you dive"

you recognize that you have a problem. you want to correct it. you have a goal. you just need a path between the status quo and your goal. so get out there and immerse yourself in the situations you're describing. putting yourself around women is less pressure, as you can choose to never see the women again. you can make your first victory there, with the least repercussions.

now get out there and succeed!

 

[Jariel]

Keep on doing things that make you nervous, and sooner or later, the things that made you a little nervous, wont make you nervous at all; the things that made you more nervous, will only make you a little nervous. Keep this going, and your nervousness won't appear that often. In the end, there should scarcely be any more of it(nervousness) left.

I agree! It's just a matter of adapting and developing comfort within these situations.

Also, try slowing down. When people get nervous, they get physical symptoms, such as fast heart rate, breathing and stuttering (which can lead to panic attacks), but by slowing down, taking your time talking and breathing slowly, you can counteract the physical symptoms and stop the nervousness getting the better of you.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Zig Ziglar, a famous sales trainer, said "do what you fear most, and you control your fear."

If you really want to get over a fear, you have to do the opposite of what most people do - they hide from it. Take proactive steps to put yourself into the situations with which you have the most trouble. Joining the public speaking club Toastmaster's would help you immensely. There will be women there, too. Most people think that the speech club is the people who are naturally good at public speaking, but imo it is often the opposite. Toastmaster's has a lot of members who were once much like you. But they had the initiative to do something difficult and tackle their problem.

Here you go, Picard - the keys to the kingdom:

http://www.libertyvillagetoastmasters.com/

http://home.cc.umanitoba.ca/~lang/toaslink.htm

http://www.eecg.toronto.edu/~dunc/toastmasters/

Either you want to have this problem, or you want to get rid of it.