Hiya
I have jost joined this forum, and I really need a quick bit of advice. I am meeting a girl on staurday I have been `sort of' since November
1. We started dating in November,then after few weeks shes started saying she just wanted to be friends, and maybe when she was sorted out, we could get together later. I said why? She said these things happen, just changed her mind. I was too clingy and keen before hand, maybe this put her off. Also, the situtaion was complicated, as she has a kid,and we work together. She brought a house with her ex-partner (the father) and still lives there, while they are selling it.
2. I eased off and tried to be friends and it was going ok. I wasn't being too heavy. We met up one weekend, kissed etc. Then she says the weekend made a big difference to her feelings for me.
3. The week or twe after this we text, talk etc. She says im the man for her, she really likes me, she thinks of me etc. I probbaly get a bit too keen again, and say i love her etc. I know, this wrong. But shed did lead me on a bit, but my fault, yes!
4. We go away valentines weekend, have what i thought was a good weekend. I text her if ok, she ignores me for 4days, says she busy, get back in touch. 3 days later texts, basic outcome,wnana be friends, nothing heavy. I say ok. She said i dont love her, i was confused.She says, how can u say u love me, and wanna be friends? I say perhaps i was confused, and she says i used her.
5. I leave it at that, and try to next her and ignore her, not delierately, just try to get my head together. She says why u ignoring me, we need to talk. I agree, shes says, she'll let me know. Week goes by, no response. text out the blue, how are you. then shes says sorry for not meeting to talk, didnt think right time. So i just carry on and distance myself.Sometomes if she texts and i dont respond for a while, she gets annoyed. If i text her and dont respond, i dont do anthing.
6.I text her say, we gonna talk or what etc, as im hurting really care for her.. She responds five hours later, dont think we can be more than friends.I withdraw.
6. Out the blue again, she says u in a mood. I say, look, i could be friends, just need time and space to my head together. I was assertive. If ur a friend, i say, respect my way of handling it, and ill be ok soon. She says, respect her by not ignoring her. She then says, in a pissed way,i thogiht u wanted to talk, (which i did weeks before, but apparently, she didnt!) either meet up or forget it.Shed cant do this anymore. She has things to do.
7.I agree to meet
Questions:
1.What should i do Saturday. I am going to lay it on the line, were either friends or together. Making your mind up time.You think this best? Any advice to retrieve the situation?
2.In my heart i wanna be with her, but is she playing me?I i stay friends, it wll always be in my mind to be with her. She must know this, so why insisit on being friends? Unless she really hasn't made her mind up.For some reason, i was wishy washy and nice at the start, maybe this put an impression in her mind. I know aht i want, she says ahe wants friends, but if i aint all over her like a puppy dog, she complains. Is it better to next her, to help myself and my own mind. What does she want?Is she playign me delibertaly, or just flaky?
3. She apporoached me in the first instance, was/am i on the good ladder, and been booted off, twice? Is it worth pursuing?
Cheers everyone. I am realising ive probbaly been an IW. Id like to retrieve it. I retrieved it once, i thought, but maybe shes been cleverer than me along along.I aint got much dating expreince, maybe saw me coming.
Main thing is, what should i do Saturday, should i even go?I text her on Thursday she how she is, she didnt respond. I think she menas more to me, than me to her, she seems in charge, and im running around when she says.
Thank You all
David
I have jost joined this forum, and I really need a quick bit of advice. I am meeting a girl on staurday I have been `sort of' since November
1. We started dating in November,then after few weeks shes started saying she just wanted to be friends, and maybe when she was sorted out, we could get together later. I said why? She said these things happen, just changed her mind. I was too clingy and keen before hand, maybe this put her off. Also, the situtaion was complicated, as she has a kid,and we work together. She brought a house with her ex-partner (the father) and still lives there, while they are selling it.
2. I eased off and tried to be friends and it was going ok. I wasn't being too heavy. We met up one weekend, kissed etc. Then she says the weekend made a big difference to her feelings for me.
3. The week or twe after this we text, talk etc. She says im the man for her, she really likes me, she thinks of me etc. I probbaly get a bit too keen again, and say i love her etc. I know, this wrong. But shed did lead me on a bit, but my fault, yes!
4. We go away valentines weekend, have what i thought was a good weekend. I text her if ok, she ignores me for 4days, says she busy, get back in touch. 3 days later texts, basic outcome,wnana be friends, nothing heavy. I say ok. She said i dont love her, i was confused.She says, how can u say u love me, and wanna be friends? I say perhaps i was confused, and she says i used her.
5. I leave it at that, and try to next her and ignore her, not delierately, just try to get my head together. She says why u ignoring me, we need to talk. I agree, shes says, she'll let me know. Week goes by, no response. text out the blue, how are you. then shes says sorry for not meeting to talk, didnt think right time. So i just carry on and distance myself.Sometomes if she texts and i dont respond for a while, she gets annoyed. If i text her and dont respond, i dont do anthing.
6.I text her say, we gonna talk or what etc, as im hurting really care for her.. She responds five hours later, dont think we can be more than friends.I withdraw.
6. Out the blue again, she says u in a mood. I say, look, i could be friends, just need time and space to my head together. I was assertive. If ur a friend, i say, respect my way of handling it, and ill be ok soon. She says, respect her by not ignoring her. She then says, in a pissed way,i thogiht u wanted to talk, (which i did weeks before, but apparently, she didnt!) either meet up or forget it.Shed cant do this anymore. She has things to do.
7.I agree to meet
Questions:
1.What should i do Saturday. I am going to lay it on the line, were either friends or together. Making your mind up time.You think this best? Any advice to retrieve the situation?
2.In my heart i wanna be with her, but is she playing me?I i stay friends, it wll always be in my mind to be with her. She must know this, so why insisit on being friends? Unless she really hasn't made her mind up.For some reason, i was wishy washy and nice at the start, maybe this put an impression in her mind. I know aht i want, she says ahe wants friends, but if i aint all over her like a puppy dog, she complains. Is it better to next her, to help myself and my own mind. What does she want?Is she playign me delibertaly, or just flaky?
3. She apporoached me in the first instance, was/am i on the good ladder, and been booted off, twice? Is it worth pursuing?
Cheers everyone. I am realising ive probbaly been an IW. Id like to retrieve it. I retrieved it once, i thought, but maybe shes been cleverer than me along along.I aint got much dating expreince, maybe saw me coming.
Main thing is, what should i do Saturday, should i even go?I text her on Thursday she how she is, she didnt respond. I think she menas more to me, than me to her, she seems in charge, and im running around when she says.
Thank You all
David
