"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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newbeginning

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After hanging out with a bunch of friends and meeeting her for the first time, i took her home. On the way home she asked if i date often and what i look for in a girl. Of course I led her know my standard was high. She also stated that i am quiet and not open. She on the other hand is very open and outgoing. Can you read anything from those questions?? What kind of tactics should i use in this case. Thank you.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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milkman

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Originally posted by newbeginning
After hanging out with a bunch of friends and meeeting her for the first time, i took her home.
Good idea.

Originally posted by newbeginning
On the way home she asked if i date often and what i look for in a girl.
Good sign on the one hand but might also be a sign that you are kind of passive. Did you make clear that you like her? Do you escalate kino?

Originally posted by newbeginning
Of course I led her know my standard was high.
Bad idea. Show her that you have high standards by the way you behave. Telling that one has high standards usually will let him appear kind of insecure.

Originally posted by newbeginning
She also stated that i am quiet and not open.
Maybe she is right and you are not open. Seems like you hide yourself behind 'tactics'.

Originally posted by newbeginning
She on the other hand is very open and outgoing.
Great.

Originally posted by newbeginning
Can you read anything from those questions?? What kind of tactics should i use in this case.
Seems like she likes you and expects you to do something. Make the moves, that is all you need and should do.

First goal: kiss her.
 

newbeginning

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what does it mean when a girl ask you "what do you look for in a girl" when you just met her a couple of times. Is she interested or just plane friendly.
 

blueangel83

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I'm a female and I'll tell you exactly what she is thinking....

She is interested in you and is wondering if she fits the bill.

NEVER tell her that you have high standards, she will feel insecure, 80% chance will get turned off and put you in the friend zone.

She likes you and is waiting for you to ask her out.

Since you messed up the first time, start complimenting her but don't overdo it.

Good luck!

Meg
 

newbeginning

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well all i said is that my perfect girl would has to be ATTRACTIVE (stressed it), independent, responsible, etc.... dont think that is such high standard. The point i was trying to convey was that i have some what of a standard. I was also trying to make her qualify to my standards instead of the other way around. I guess i did more wrong than good.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Freeman

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Originally posted by newbeginning
After hanging out with a bunch of friends and meeeting her for the first time, i took her home. On the way home she asked if i date often and what i look for in a girl. Of course I led her know my standard was high. She also stated that i am quiet and not open. She on the other hand is very open and outgoing. Can you read anything from those questions?? What kind of tactics should i use in this case. Thank you.

Yea-establish your dominance early on-dont let her think you're some kind of wimp!
 

TxCowboy

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Originally posted by blueangel83
I'm a female and I'll tell you exactly what she is thinking....

She is interested in you and is wondering if she fits the bill.

NEVER tell her that you have high standards, she will feel insecure, 80% chance will get turned off and put you in the friend zone.

She likes you and is waiting for you to ask her out.

Since you messed up the first time, start complimenting her but don't overdo it.

Good luck!

Meg
u must be smoking crack if u think that by complimenting her its gonna win her over ... i GUARANTEE if u start saying that , she'll start running :D
 

Gonzalo

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Originally posted by blueangel83
I'm a female and I'll tell you exactly what she is thinking....
Let me tell you a story, girl. Most men in here happen to BE here because most of the "common sense" girly-advice administrated to us by female friends happened to be totally off. Not to be chauvinistic, but face it, you have no edge whatsoever by being a girl on giving advice to men.


To the original poster: whenever a girl starts to get you to qualify yourself to her ("you are not open"), stop right there and turn the tables: get HER to qualify herself to you, like you were doing with the high standards thing you had going on. YOu don't want to be in the position of having to make excuses for a girl on the way you are. "Be the prize" remember?
 

newbeginning

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gave her a call 3 days later and she actually sounded interested to hang out. hopefully i wont mess this up.
 

newbeginning

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yeepee, a success story here. Asked her to hang out and talk, she took the bait. I was just being my self (laid back) but involved with everything that she has to say. I messed around with her image and blah blah blah. Ended with HER GIVING ME A BIG HUG. I'm very satisfied with the results. Thanks.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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