Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Need some serious Advice here

Georgepithyou

Banned
Joined
Jan 17, 2020
Messages
1,799
Reaction score
2,225
Age
27
Location
Sydney
So I will get straight to the point.

I commute to work daily and always tske the same train, now there is this cute girl that always takes the same train and same carriage as me. This has been going on since June last year but I have never once spoken to her.

This may sound like such a beta question but is it too late to approach he? I'M more of an indirext gane kind of a guy.

Helpful advice would be appreciated, as for openers I was thinking of just a oberservational statement.
 

AttackFormation

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2014
Messages
4,126
Reaction score
3,659
Age
31
Location
Sweden
Does she make eye contact with you?
 

lamath

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 29, 2018
Messages
2,745
Reaction score
2,676
Age
42
Location
Canada
Hey
Try to not give a **** if its too late or not, you might have had a gf all that time and just recently got back on the market.

Plz dont look for reason not to approach.

Juste say a few word to her you will know fast enough if she is interested or not.
 

Young OG

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 6, 2015
Messages
1,245
Reaction score
1,056
Location
USA
So I will get straight to the point.

I commute to work daily and always tske the same train, now there is this cute girl that always takes the same train and same carriage as me. This has been going on since June last year but I have never once spoken to her.

This may sound like such a beta question but is it too late to approach he? I'M more of an indirext gane kind of a guy.

Helpful advice would be appreciated, as for openers I was thinking of just a oberservational statement.
Just approach her. Since you waited so long, I would probably do an indirect/observational opener like you had said. Remember, rejection over regret. One day she might not be on that same train anymore and you will be angry at yourself for not saying anything to her. Good luck.
 

MrWood

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 15, 2016
Messages
1,784
Reaction score
1,201
Age
58
Location
Scandinavia
"I know you're following me. How much are they paying you?"
this works, very well.
especially if there has been smile/eye/hello play in the past.

others that work well (you must have a smile or recognition you recognize each other):
"I know what you are doing"
"just stop"
"you need to stop following me"
"you are a spy, arent you?"
 

backseatjuan

Banned
Joined
Nov 2, 2011
Messages
4,474
Reaction score
1,657
Age
43
Location
Россия
So I will get straight to the point.
So will I.

You are looking for an excuse not to approach by posting this. You're a coward.

A young man, overflowing with desire, saw a woman he thought was extremely cute. She was simply walking around and was involved with her own things.

“I should speak to her,” he told himself. “I must meet her!”

But his body would not obey. He stood there, watching her in the corner of his eye, and felt as if he was burning. She eventually left and he cursed himself even more.

Then appeared another woman who was even cuter!

“I should say hi,” he told himself. Yet, he stood like a statue and his body felt as if he was burning.

“She is out of my league. She would never go for someone like me!”

He never approached and the woman left.

Yet, another woman appeared more beautiful than the first two!

Somehow, he got himself to approach. “Hi!” he sputtered nervously. She was pleasant. He eventually asked for the number to which she said no. Even though he failed, he felt much better that he tried.

“Alas,” he said now realizing the error of his ways.


“Rejection is better than Regret”

“Remember,” said Pook. “Change is gradual. Before, you saw no opportunities. Now, you see them all about you, yet you are too hesitant to take them. You’re slowly becoming more aware.”

“What are you saying?”

“When you find yourself hesitant, always yield to Action. If you see her, do not wait, gawk or wait for a ‘perfect moment’. Action, action, action!”

“Pook, I cannot. You see… I am insecure. I don’t have that confidence!”

“You are confusing CAUSE and EFFECT. The CAUSE of your hesitant nature is not because of your insecurity. You have not gotten what you’ve wanted, what you’ve desired. THAT is the cause of your hesitant nature.”

“What?”

“You are caught in the vicious cycle. You are hesitant because you are not used to things going your way. And things will never go your way because you remain hesitant. You see what you want, become hesitant, and the door of opportunity closes. It happens again. And again. And again. With each choice towards Inaction, you reject yourself a little bit more.”

Pook continued. “This is where that cycle of hesitation leads. In your world of Hesitation, you shred off more and more of your manliness until you turn into a full-fledged Nice Guy. Then you seek to remove hesitation by making the approach risk free. Then you start giving gifts, poetry, flowers, and declarations of love. You start to examine and re-examine non-existent signals until they read the way you want them to read. In the end, you place her on the pedestal and throw yourself to her worship.

“If there is a choice between less pain or the possibility of more pain, we default to the less pain. In adolescence, going for a girl and failing made you think everyone else would laugh at you. Whether or not it was true, you thought it was true. This was how you were kept within the cycle.”

“But Pook! How do I get out?”

“By realizing that the choice of Inaction is more painful than Action. Childhood is over. You are the MAN. You must approach. Always default to Action now. From those of us who wasted years in that hesitation mode know that Rejection is always better than Regret. Always.”
 

Georgepithyou

Banned
Joined
Jan 17, 2020
Messages
1,799
Reaction score
2,225
Age
27
Location
Sydney
Does she make eye contact with you?
Yes she does
You probably blew your chance months ago but it’s worth a shot. Just do it. Talk to her, ask for her number.
I probably have waited too long to be honest

Just approach her. Since you waited so long, I would probably do an indirect/observational opener like you had said. Remember, rejection over regret. One day she might not be on that same train anymore and you will be angry at yourself for not saying anything to her. Good luck.
Back when i was in University, I did the same with a girl that always had the same classes as me, never approached her and one day she was gone
If you are coming from the right frame, there is no such thing as blowing your chance. That implies she’s the judge of all matters. There have been times in my social circles where women tell me they’ve never heard me utter a single word. And I would just shrug. If I am not sleeping with them, why even give them a syllable? Lol.

Guys need to break the habit of trying to seduce women. All you are doing is breaking the ice. You can break the ice any time. You can do it year one, year two, year three, or 50 years later. It’s completely irrelevant.

The only thing you are doing is feeling out her vibe to see if there’s any interest or attraction there.

My question is what happened to you to make you think she’s a 50 foot monster to where you can’t even break the ice? Who hurt you and ruined your self esteem? Work on your inner game/frame first before you even try to be some Casanova.

Last week some random tatted guy probably banged her in a public bathroom at a night club. The week before that she was probably in threesome. In all likelyhood she probably has 3-4 stds.

But in your mind she’s the ice princess you’ve been fantasizing about for a year straight.

This is why most guys fail even before the approach. They’ve already pedestalized random chicks and assign them mythical qualities when in all likelylhood the chick probably has a lay count of over 100.
I have no idea, when i started noticing she takes the same train as me everyday I started waiting for thr perfect time to ask and when i looked my best and kept just delaying and delyaing it
 

FMCSMT

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 8, 2017
Messages
221
Reaction score
153
Age
43
Honestly it’s probably not meant to be then.

She’s already on a steep pedestal with you.

Besides, how are the train rides going to go after you get rejected?

I usually try to encourage but I would exercise some forward thinking and caution just so you don’t feel like you wish you hadn’t.
 

Georgepithyou

Banned
Joined
Jan 17, 2020
Messages
1,799
Reaction score
2,225
Age
27
Location
Sydney
Honestly it’s probably not meant to be then.

She’s already on a steep pedestal with you.

Besides, how are the train rides going to go after you get rejected?

I usually try to encourage but I would exercise some forward thinking and caution just so you don’t feel like you wish you hadn’t.
Yeah that is one of the main reasons i hesitated for so long, when she rejects me it would make all future train rides awkward.

Might just go indirect for a while and gauge interest, if she doesnt seem interested wont escalate.
 

zinc4

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 17, 2007
Messages
3,093
Reaction score
1,456
So I will get straight to the point.

I commute to work daily and always tske the same train, now there is this cute girl that always takes the same train and same carriage as me. This has been going on since June last year but I have never once spoken to her.

This may sound like such a beta question but is it too late to approach he? I'M more of an indirext gane kind of a guy.

Helpful advice would be appreciated, as for openers I was thinking of just a oberservational statement.

You are the same guy who just told me in the tinder thread to approach girls in real life but are hesitating this much over some random girl on the train....lmfao...I would have approached this train chick first or second time I saw her. Stop trying to offer advice in other threads if you are this much of a noob. Since June....lmao...just talk to her already.
 

BadBoy89

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 18, 2020
Messages
1,709
Reaction score
2,009
I commute to work daily and always tske the same train, now there is this cute girl that always takes the same train and same carriage as me. This has been going on since June last year but I have never once spoken to her.

This may sound like such a beta question but is it too late to approach he? I'M more of an indirext gane kind of a guy.
Thats great you are more of an indirect game kind of guy. But this cute girl could only respond well to a direct game kind of guy.

I find a lot of men on this site look at a situation from only their point of view. Unless you are a dictator or in a great position power, there is always two sides to a situation. This cute girl could have a boyfriend, have a child, be married, be a slut, be a virgin, be waiting for a guy to ask her out in a train so she can fall in love.

Life is all about perspective. The way you look at a situation is not the way the situation is, or they way the love of your life looks at the situation.
 

zinc4

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 17, 2007
Messages
3,093
Reaction score
1,456
Guys.....the easiest way to get over the fear of talking to a woman is....simply ask something mundane such as, do you know where the nearest movie theatre is and you will pretty much know right away by the look on her face and body language if you can progress from there or not....

If she is very matter of fact and body language saying leave me alone or I'm in a hurry then just thank her for the info. If her eyes light up and smiling then progress it into flirting....

If you do this, your rejection numbers will decrease greatly even with approaching lots of women. I did cold sales for about 7 years so talking to random people is easy to me.

In this train scenario simply tell her your phone died and ask her for the correct time or just any little mundane question....if she is friendly acting then progress it into more. If she is like gtfa from me just say thanks and walk away.

Or you can take the bold approach, introduce yourself and tell her you always see her on the train and wanted to say hi....

First way means zero chance of rejection though if you are worried about that.
 

BackInTheGame78

Moderator
Joined
Sep 10, 2014
Messages
12,993
Reaction score
13,898
Yeah that is one of the main reasons i hesitated for so long, when she rejects me it would make all future train rides awkward.

Might just go indirect for a while and gauge interest, if she doesnt seem interested wont escalate.
"When she rejects me".

Why bother even approaching when you have already created a self fulfilling prophecy in your subconcious mind?

Trust me, no matter what you do your brain will figure out a way to make that a true statement every time since that is what you believe will happen.
 
Top