Yesterday I went out with a bunch of work colleagues and I got talking to a girl at work, body HB10 face HB6, we got talking and I went back to her place and fvcked all night. The problem is I think she wants a relationship whereas I know we are not compatible at all and I wanna keep it as a **** buddy situation. Normally this would not be a problem but we work together and see eachother everyday and everyone saw us leave together which will get the gossip mill going at work and believe me this is not a good thing. I really dont know what to do, ive got a feeling that this is gonna turn into a big thing, I really dont like the idea of my personal life being the talk of the office and what with us both looking for different things I can see this getting worse before it gets better.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Need some advice
- Thread starter Zebedee
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
KontrollerX
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2005
- Messages
- 4,476
- Reaction score
- 182
Don't sh!t where you eat.
You have been warned.
Should you decide to continue this which you probably will likely due to having no other options the best thing you can do is simply skirt around her whinings for a relationship and make sure you never promise her anything or agree to any of her relationship talk.
When she brings it up always have an excuse ready for why you have to leave her presence that moment or find some way to ignore her question and move on to talking about something else quickly.
Her: I like you but I feel best in a relationship to keep sleeping with a guy.
You: Thats sweet...anyway you coming to the company picnic this weekend?
Some sh!t like that transition it to.
Its still going to blow up in your face and be a load of needless drama but you could save your reputation with other chicks by reminding everyone whose interested that you never promised her anything or agreed to anything.
You saw it as purely getting your rocks off and made no committment to anything more.
You did not lead her on.
You have been warned.
Should you decide to continue this which you probably will likely due to having no other options the best thing you can do is simply skirt around her whinings for a relationship and make sure you never promise her anything or agree to any of her relationship talk.
When she brings it up always have an excuse ready for why you have to leave her presence that moment or find some way to ignore her question and move on to talking about something else quickly.
Her: I like you but I feel best in a relationship to keep sleeping with a guy.
You: Thats sweet...anyway you coming to the company picnic this weekend?
Some sh!t like that transition it to.
Its still going to blow up in your face and be a load of needless drama but you could save your reputation with other chicks by reminding everyone whose interested that you never promised her anything or agreed to anything.
You saw it as purely getting your rocks off and made no committment to anything more.
You did not lead her on.
Thanks. Its pretty fvcked up because if she starts talking to me at work like we are a couple then I will be fvcked and if I ask her to downplay things at work then who knows what will happen, maybe she will be cool with it but more likely I can see it making things worse. Plus a lot of people where I work are liars, they spoke bad **** about me to her just because im confident, ****y and speak my mind at work some people have a problem with me.
Desdinova
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2004
- Messages
- 11,681
- Reaction score
- 4,880
Write it off as a one night thing and leave it at that. You're already learning why you shouldn't stick your dink in the company ink, now LEARN FROM IT.
Please don't tell me "well, it just kinda happened that way" because it's horse5hit. You have entire control over what you do. You can plan to never fvck another co-worker again and follow through with it. Tell her you're just not ready for any kind of relationship, and she WILL respect you for that decision. She may not like it, but she'll respect you for it.
You are in control of your life, not her.
However, if you continue to fvck her and 5hit goes sour between you, just remember that the only one you've got to blame is yourself because you decided to stick your dink in the company ink, and that ink is PERMANENT.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
scrouds
Master Don Juan
You're pretty much already fuucked.
I say take her for a ride and enjoy it while it lasts. The sheiiT storm will happen sooner or later, so might as well live it up.
Then, find a new job.
I say take her for a ride and enjoy it while it lasts. The sheiiT storm will happen sooner or later, so might as well live it up.
Then, find a new job.