Need some advice, she's an HB 8.5 but is 6 years younger than me

[Jaxon]

I originally talked about this a few months ago, but after going back and re-reading my original post, I sounded incredibly desperate and like I had a serious case of oneitis. It was a longer post than necessary, plus I dropped the m-bomb which ended up getting completely misconstrued and totally distracting from the point of the thread. So I decided to start fresh and go from here.
I'll give you the gist of what I posted then:
I'm 25 and am interested in a 19 year old. My family has been good friends with her family for most of my life. Her parents love me, I love them, it works out good. I haven't seen or talked to this girl for a while, but after talking to a mutual friend and hearing how attractive (HB 8.5) and (relatively, given her age) successful she has been, I decided it might be something worth pursuing.
She was valedictorian, class president, and now is going to college on an athletic scholarship. She's the type of girl that has afcs following her around by the truckload, and will end up with a highly successful guy, whether it's me or someone else.
So I figure I should at least get myself on her radar because you never know what could come of it. Couple of details: she lives 2 hours away from me. It's not super far but it's not exactly the other side of town either. I don't mind dating chicks that live out of town though because that way I'm guaranteed my time, and only see them on occasion.
And, she has a boyfriend. Our mutual friend told me that it's not that serious though and she doesn't think it will last. Regardless, I'll treat her as if she's single because so long as she's not married she's fair game in my book.
Anyway originally I wasn't sure what would be the best method to get in contact with her because I didn't have her phone number or email. Our mutual friend said she would give them to me but I didn't really want to go about it that way. I wanted to initiate contact with her on my own somehow.

The current situation:
I will be in her town on business for a few days coming up here pretty soon. The good part is that I called her mom to see if I could stay at their place while I'm there, and her mom of course said yes and got all excited.
A couple weeks after this I noticed that she we had a mutual friend on facebook. So just yesterday I sent her a friends request with the following message attached:

"Hey Erica, it's been a while. How are things?"

She accepted my friends request on the same day that it was sent and immediately wrote me back a long paragraph giving me a mini-update on her life, asking how I am, etc. In the paragraph she stated something along the lines of:

"I heard you're staying with my parents soon, maybe I'll come back for a night while you're there, it's a pretty good excuse for a home cooked meal you know".

And that's where things are right now. I haven't written her back yet and am not exactly sure how to approach it from here. Originally I was planning on telling her I'd be in town staying at her parent's place and that we should do something while I was there, but she sort of already beat me to the punch.

So I'm not sure if I should go right for the digits, write back with a counter-offer, or just go into it as is and see what happens, if she shows up, etc. It seems as if her interest level is high since she wrote back so quick...or maybe she just views me as a friend and was excited to hear from me. Either way though I won't be initiating more contact for at least a couple of days.

So what do you fellow DJs recommend I do from here?

 

[KontrollerX]

Go after her.

Keep the mindset that it is going to be a fun fling that you may be able to drag out for a few months or years and guard that heart.

This chick is only 19 lots of living to do yet don't think you can lock her down permaneantly as you can do all the DJ techniques in the world, you can do everything right but you can't make yourself into someone new if/when she starts craving that to see whats out there as at her age variety is the spice of life lol.

 

[Reyaj]

I originally talked about this a few months ago, but after going back and re-reading my original post, I sounded incredibly desperate and like I had a serious case of oneitis. It was a longer post than necessary, plus I dropped the m-bomb which ended up getting completely misconstrued and totally distracting from the point of the thread. So I decided to start fresh and go from here.
I'll give you the gist of what I posted then:
I'm 25 and am interested in a 19 year old. My family has been good friends with her family for most of my life. Her parents love me, I love them, it works out good. I haven't seen or talked to this girl for a while, but after talking to a mutual friend and hearing how attractive (HB 8.5) and (relatively, given her age) successful she has been, I decided it might be something worth pursuing.
She was valedictorian, class president, and now is going to college on an athletic scholarship. She's the type of girl that has afcs following her around by the truckload, and will end up with a highly successful guy, whether it's me or someone else.
So I figure I should at least get myself on her radar because you never know what could come of it. Couple of details: she lives 2 hours away from me. It's not super far but it's not exactly the other side of town either. I don't mind dating chicks that live out of town though because that way I'm guaranteed my time, and only see them on occasion.
And, she has a boyfriend. Our mutual friend told me that it's not that serious though and she doesn't think it will last. Regardless, I'll treat her as if she's single because so long as she's not married she's fair game in my book.
Anyway originally I wasn't sure what would be the best method to get in contact with her because I didn't have her phone number or email. Our mutual friend said she would give them to me but I didn't really want to go about it that way. I wanted to initiate contact with her on my own somehow.

The current situation:
I will be in her town on business for a few days coming up here pretty soon. The good part is that I called her mom to see if I could stay at their place while I'm there, and her mom of course said yes and got all excited.
A couple weeks after this I noticed that she we had a mutual friend on facebook. So just yesterday I sent her a friends request with the following message attached:

"Hey Erica, it's been a while. How are things?"

She accepted my friends request on the same day that it was sent and immediately wrote me back a long paragraph giving me a mini-update on her life, asking how I am, etc. In the paragraph she stated something along the lines of:

"I heard you're staying with my parents soon, maybe I'll come back for a night while you're there, it's a pretty good excuse for a home cooked meal you know".

And that's where things are right now. I haven't written her back yet and am not exactly sure how to approach it from here. Originally I was planning on telling her I'd be in town staying at her parent's place and that we should do something while I was there, but she sort of already beat me to the punch.

So I'm not sure if I should go right for the digits, write back with a counter-offer, or just go into it as is and see what happens, if she shows up, etc. It seems as if her interest level is high since she wrote back so quick...or maybe she just views me as a friend and was excited to hear from me. Either way though I won't be initiating more contact for at least a couple of days.

So what do you fellow DJs recommend I do from here?

Hey man I got your pm. You are doing pretty good so far. I'm glad you've held back and haven't responded quickly.... At this point what I would do is maybe wait another day and then respond with something along the lines of

"you definitely should come, it will be great to see you "

Just keep it light and vague. At this point what you want to do is gauge her interest level.... If she does end up coming that is a very good sign.... Since you are older the best thing you can do is show it when you see her. Be mature... let her see that you aren't like the little boys she is used to seeing at school.

Like I said I had a relationship of an even greater age disparity than yours... Be relaxed, cool, and definitely don't develop oneitis... It sounds like you haven't seen this girl in a while so you really need to feel her out and make sure she is still worth your interest.... if it is just feel out the situation and let it progress as much as she wants it to....

 

[Jaxon]

"you definitely should come, it will be great to see you "

Just keep it light and vague. At this point what you want to do is gauge her interest level.... If she does end up coming that is a very good sign.... Since you are older the best thing you can do is show it when you see her.

Yeah this is sort of what I was leaning towards doing. I thought about going with the straight aggressive approach and getting the digits right away, but with the age difference I don't want to frighten her off. Since I'm fairly significantly older than her I'm assuming she'll be thinking I'm out of her league, at least somewhat.

I almost think it would just be better to see her, guage her interest and then let her chase me. I can show my interest when I see her like you said--or at least enough interest to get her wondering, but not let her know for sure. Pretty much my goal for my time there is just to leave with her number. If I can do that I'll consider it a successful venture.

As I said I'll be there for a few days, and I'm assuming she'll show up for at least one of them. I'm also wondering if when she shows up, assuming things go well, I should encourage her to do something else with me when I'm there, or just play it cool and roll with whatever happens.

 

[Jaxon]

...anyone else have a take?

 

[Reyaj]

Yeah this is sort of what I was leaning towards doing. I thought about going with the straight aggressive approach and getting the digits right away, but with the age difference I don't want to frighten her off. Since I'm fairly significantly older than her I'm assuming she'll be thinking I'm out of her league, at least somewhat.

I almost think it would just be better to see her, guage her interest and then let her chase me. I can show my interest when I see her like you said--or at least enough interest to get her wondering, but not let her know for sure. Pretty much my goal for my time there is just to leave with her number. If I can do that I'll consider it a successful venture.

As I said I'll be there for a few days, and I'm assuming she'll show up for at least one of them. I'm also wondering if when she shows up, assuming things go well, I should encourage her to do something else with me when I'm there, or just play it cool and roll with whatever happens.

Let me know what happens dude!