"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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need some advice: how to get to the next level

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sparky1981

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Lately I been going out with this chick. I been out wit her a few times now. But so far not been able to get to the next level with her. Ofton when we meet up its in town she has work the next morning. So at 2.am though we have some great time out but shes not really up for anything else so i let her go home and catch some sleep When you been out all night and you start work early the next morning I can understand where shes coming from. Shes a busy girl ofton with work or something else and I don't c her as much as I would prob like. So my question is how do i get it to the next level? Should I sit and wait? or mybe manipulate the situtation and how so?
 
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"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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( . )( . )

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Re: need some advice

Originally posted by sparky1981
So at 2.am though we have some great time out shes not really up for anything else so i let her go home and catch some sleep When you been out all night and you start work early the next morning I can understand where shes coming from. Shes a busy girl ofton with work or something else.
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Sounds like your buying into all that rubbish thats irrelevant to your reality. "Oh but the poor girl is always sooo busy, I'm such an understanding guy blahhhh".... WRONG ATTITUDE.

Invite her over for curry and booze, she gives you ANY static you automatically delete her number. Yes its that easy.
 
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PRMoon

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Make it official. You can bring up "the next level" (read sexual relations I hope) without coming off sounding like a pervert. By getting her comfortable having two way conversations with you about sex you should be able to at least get a read on how she feels about it and the rest should be gravy from there. If you don't discuss it you'll be searching for opportunities that may not even exist. Scheming CAN work but it's definately not as effective as the direct approach. Communication is often the key to victory.
 
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sparky1981

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Thanks. I've had to do this with on her other subjects because shes not very open about herself or her feelings. Allthough through one of these conversations I found out why it is that shes not.
 
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