"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Need opinions on what happened. I dont think I screwed up

torqueboxer

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Ok here's the deal, I went to Christmas service at my church and sitting in front of me was a friend of my parents who was there with her daughter. I got a chance to see her figure every time we stood to sing....I was impressed!! So anyway by looking at her I was getting a vibe that she was kind of an ice queen(sort of the Shannon Doherty look). As we were walking out I struck up a conversation with her and had her laughing and smiling. Anyway I didnt number close, but, i did invite her to come and visit me at my shop which is local.

Anyway, she ended up coming in last week to see me. We talked for about 45 minutes. I asked her " so what are you doing this week"? And she pulled out some paper and wrote down her ## without me asking and handed it to me. She told me " to give her a call it will be fun". Sounded good to me. That was on a monday i called her about 9:30 on that wed( she said to call after 9 for her cell plan).

I called and she didnt answer, no biggie. I left a short message...no call back from her. So I waited till sat and called a little before 6pm. No answer and no return call. When she was in talking to me she mentioned that she was going to be working as a bathing suit model at the local convention center that fri and sat night...I wasnt sure if she was telling me to try to impress me with the fact that she was modeling or she was being coy and telling me so that I would show up to see her( to stroke her ego).

I kicked her down a peg by telling her that I know how hard it was going to all of those modeling shows because an old GF of mine used to do the same stuff. I figured by saying that to her I would give my self social proof of having dated girls that were her physical equal. At the same time complimenting her on the fact that I thought that what she was doing is tough.

Anybody got any ideas what might be the problem? I pretty much put her in the NEXT pile. Give me some ideas on what the deal might be. I thought I did every thing right. If I left anything out let me know. I was actually looking forward to hanging with this chick..then she sends the mixed signals.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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sapphire

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You did all that you needed to do by calling her several times and leaving messages. I would not attempt calling more than three times. Otherwise you will appear as being needy and desperate The ball is know in her court. If she is interested, she will call.

By the way, if she is a model she is used to alot of attention. She may be your typical AW who thrives on guys falling all over her. I would not give too much promise on this bird considering her flakey behavior.
 

Rogerman

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Patience, my dear friend...Patience...


I'll say wait for her move.


Until then look for other girls.
 

Don Juanabbe

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Torque, you handled everything perfectly, the ball is in her court. Wait a few more days, and try her again, if she doesn't answer or call you back, then you've got your answer.
 

TillTheEndOfTime

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You did fine. Like someone said, she's probably an AW looking for more attention. Just make some runs at other girls and put her on the back burner.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Nightspark

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Remember my friend.... cell phone messages especially the voicemail ones cost money to retrieve and what not.....

did u try SMS messaging her?

dont do it now... but that's just a warning to all who are leaving messages on their vmail :rolleyes: Besides vmail's a tricky mofo...

anyways sit tight and SMS her someother time later... :D
 

torqueboxer

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Update...two hours after I posted...guess what? She came in to see me. I totally teased her for not calling me back after I called. She seemed like she was actually worried that I would be upset. I gave her all kinds of crap for it...and she was loving it!! You guys were totally right I am getting the impression that she is an AW...so anytime she seems to be saying anything Attention ***** like I'll counter with something like this;

her; I'll be modeling at the boat show this weekend..

me; Really? Awsome!! Can you get me some tickets?

her; oh you want to come down to see me, huh?

me; uhh...right...and the new seedoo's are out.

her; well will you at least come and watch me walk?( all super nice and smiling)

By totally not commenting on her "modeling" basically I just let the air right out of her sails. She would switch from slightly ****y to trying to make me want to spend some time with her. Basically using the advice from here to get a girl off of her high horse. Works perfectly....thanks Sosuave...LOL

After awhile of hanging out with me she asked me to spend some time with her today. I told her I was busy but she could come along with me while I looked for a new gym. I guess we'll see what happens.

Like always thanks guys.
 

DeathDealer

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She is an Attention Wh0re.

You are her AFC.

End of story.
 

Ice Cold

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Originally posted by torqueboxer
Update...two hours after I posted...guess what? She came in to see me. I totally teased her for not calling me back after I called. She seemed like she was actually worried that I would be upset. I gave her all kinds of crap for it...and she was loving it!! You guys were totally right I am getting the impression that she is an AW...so anytime she seems to be saying anything Attention ***** like I'll counter with something like this;

her; I'll be modeling at the boat show this weekend..

me; Really? Awsome!! Can you get me some tickets?

her; oh you want to come down to see me, huh?

me; uhh...right...and the new seedoo's are out.

her; well will you at least come and watch me walk?( all super nice and smiling)

By totally not commenting on her "modeling" basically I just let the air right out of her sails. She would switch from slightly ****y to trying to make me want to spend some time with her. Basically using the advice from here to get a girl off of her high horse. Works perfectly....thanks Sosuave...LOL

After awhile of hanging out with me she asked me to spend some time with her today. I told her I was busy but she could come along with me while I looked for a new gym. I guess we'll see what happens.

Like always thanks guys.
Dude. I don't know if your ex was a model or not.

But the mere fact that she models, doesn't mean much. In fact...

I've kinda found it similar to celebrities. They act cool/happy/smiling on camera, but inside they are lonely, insecure and unhappy. And want that feeling of belonging to someone.

Same with models. It may be find for her to find a guy.... guys drool and check her out... ok. She may consider it "normal" behaviour and not an IOI.

Plus... she's surrounded by hot girls on her job. She's probably just "average" there... so she may not put herself on a pedestal at all...

Torque: You both like each other. It's obvious. At this point you should stop trying to "pick her up" or "game her"... but you should just hook up.

Date->Kiss->Makeout No games

Then... when she's gotten a taste of your hugs and kisses and/or other things, you'll apply some games for behavioural correction as needed.

My 2 cents.

Death Dealer: Read the bible you noob. :p
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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torqueboxer

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I got done with work at 5;00 went home and put on some sweats(for the gym) and met her at 5;30. I told her that I needed to look for a new boxing gym. She came with me and stayed in my truck while I went in to the different places. She didnt complain at all..she acted totally cool..happy to be spending time with me. I went around for about 2 hours looking at a few different gyms. After that I stopped by my house and changeed into something better and we went to eat at a local resturant(like a family diner) nothing extravigant. We were there for about 2 hours eating and hanging out. I thought it went well.

To answer some previous questions ..yes I have dated girls who did modeling work...I wasnt making that up to her when I said that.

I am not frustrated nor am I a chump. I was actually quite smooth with her at the end of the date and easily got a nice makeout session going when I dropped her off. I cut it short before she was done and told her that I needed to get up early the next morning.(lie) I was hopeful you guys could give me some advice and lay my worrys to rest and the legit answers did help, thanks alot!!

Thanks bro's

I'll keep you updated.
 
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