"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Need Help

nonjuanlearner

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Im going' through depression at the moment, mainly due to not taking my tablets im a depression sufferer lol. Anyways i think my gf losing interest in me, im acting all clingy and needy with her and i feel like **** when i dont ring her and feel highly jealous. Thing is i dont want to feel this way its horrible and when i try not to ring her i get an horrible feeling inside, i really need help on this.

How do i get rid of this needyness its stupid
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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check_mate_kid_uk

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To get the ird of the urge to be needy is quite hard. To be less needy, just block yourself form acting in a needy way, just put the effort in not to.

Too get rid of the urge, Whilst i find excersize helps, and so does keeping oyurself busy in genral, getting more freinds and knowing lots of girls will also help. She is probably not giving you as much attention as oyu would like and 'keepnig you guessing' which makes you want her more, turn it around and do the same ot her. She will start chasing which will make oyu feel less needy because you get all the attention you want.
 

Hawke

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I used to feel like that a few years back, and i admit i still feal jealous at times to. Jealousy is natural.

But to help keep those feelings away, i agree with what was said by check mate kid, just keep busy, see your friends and have some good times. See other girls to and have some good times with them aswell. The only reason your feeling what you are is because your thinking about her, and about being with her, so aim to stop those thoughts. After awhile it get's easier... but you have to watch you don't fall back into old habbits of thinking.
 

nonjuanlearner

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yeah man i mean i wasnt like this before, i guess its cause im insecure too.

My plans are

Keep busy

Exercise everytime i feel crap

Text her to tell her im going to ring her then dont ring her at all (Sounds wierd but this seems to get her interested)

Give no more love then she does to me

Read the Dj Bible


im just affraid if i act all dis interested she'll see that as well my loss and move on :S i just hope i can bring this back because i wasnt like this before, i hope it isnt to late to be like i was when we met
 

xanderbaz

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Women are strange creatures when it comes to showing interest, you know.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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nonjuanlearner

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yeah im just a guy who's lost my way to be honest, doesnt help when shes being all depressive (she has a good reason for it ) but its killing our relationship and changing me in the process.
 

xanderbaz

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Just ask yourself then: "Do I really want to be with a girl that's depressive by nature and that's bringing me down all the time and making me feel like ****?". I know it's a hard one, but it narrows down to this.
 

Leuven

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Look, I'm no expert in relationships and so on, in fact far from it, but I know one thing. Being with somebody who is depressive from nature, is very hard, especially for you to not get depressed yourself.

So it is up to you to decide
1° You keep her and live with the fact of her depressive nature
2° You move on

You must decide what makes you more happy

Being with her, and yes live with the fact that the depression can come for you too, or move on and live single for some time
 

nonjuanlearner

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true, i cant break up with her now though, as shes got personal problems and besides she lives 6 hours away from me, so im going to be a bastard and meet other girls while going out with her :)
 
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