Need Help

[dmit39]

So I've been told by countless people that I'm a good-looking guy, and girls will bertstare me in the streets and at school. I'm shy, so generally i only find girls through friends/activities. Over the past year I've met 3 girls, all of them were stunners (8+/10) and each of them had a ladyboner for me when they first met me (their friends told me later). Trouble is, once I start communicating with them, it all goes to ****.

I'll go on a few dates with these girls, usually get a makeout or two in and then things cool down. Not really sure what happens, but we stop talking completely and then she's with some other dude in like 2 months. What happens is we'll be texting and then she starts sending one word answers etc. that signal to me that she's not interested, so i lay low for a bit and she never initiates. So obviously she had become less interested, which hurts since at the beginning she was infatuated with me, meaning it must've been my personality that drove her away.

Again, I'm a good-looking guy (as told by lots of people), i lift, i have a good paying job for my age (21), and a car, so I don't see what the problem is. I should be fighting off ***** left and right, but that's not what's happening. Anyone else been in this position before? What'd you do to get past it?

 

[whatwg]

Can you give more details about what you do after the first date? Do you wait for a week to call her? Do you call her immediately? SMS? What do you say to her? Do you not call her at all?

I've heard a lot of women complain about guys going too strong after first 1 or 2 dates and they lose interest. I think you got to lay low much earlier than that, when she's still feeling she wants you a lot.

 

[dmit39]

After the first date I try not to come on too strong, generally I'll initiate texting once every couple of days, just to say watsup or to try to set up another meeting.

What would you classify as laying low? How often should you initiate the conversation? What if she initiates?

 

[whatwg]

After the first date I try not to come on too strong, generally I'll initiate texting once every couple of days, just to say watsup or to try to set up another meeting.

What would you classify as laying low? How often should you initiate the conversation? What if she initiates?

If you're looking for an LTR, every couple of days is too much. Don't initiate SMS/call/IM for a week after the first date. When you do initiate, you book a date, not to stay and talk.

If she initiates, change the topic to when you next see each other, or if that's already arranged, talk for a bit (back and forth once or twice) and then say you got something else to do.

Don't ask a girl to see you within a week since you last saw her. If she asks you to see you within a week since you last saw her, reject her and counter offer to a week out.

Maintain this pattern for half a year. When she asks you what you think you two are, say you don't know, maybe you'll know later. Tell her you want to go slow.

I've only had a couple of LTR's though so maybe someone more experienced might contradict me later...

 

[dmit39]

If you're looking for an LTR, every couple of days is too much. Don't initiate SMS/call/IM for a week after the first date. When you do initiate, you book a date, not to stay and talk.

If she initiates, change the topic to when you next see each other, or if that's already arranged, talk for a bit (back and forth once or twice) and then say you got something else to do.

Don't ask a girl to see you within a week since you last saw her. If she asks you to see you within a week since you last saw her, reject her and counter offer to a week out.

Maintain this pattern for half a year. When she asks you what you think you two are, say you don't know, maybe you'll know later. Tell her you want to go slow.

I've only had a couple of LTR's though so maybe someone more experienced might contradict me later...

That's interesting, i've never heard of avoiding for a whole week before... maybe i'll try this next time