"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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PEPE LE PIU

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vonbock said:
Well I counteroffer twice and she has refused it twice already. SHouldn't that be enough?
The way I see it she has things to do with her life and you are not even 1% of her life. On the other hand she said I can't today but what about someday this week. I think this is an indicator of medium IL. It's not much but it is something you can work with.

If I were you I would had a phone conversation like this

her: Sorry I can't make it tomorow. How about a week day?
me: Ummm let me check my schedule. Hmmm, Mondey meeting with President of American Bank, Tuesday diner with the president of Red Cross International... Aha how about Thursday?

Or
me: I am a bit busy this week... Ummm...how about Thursday? Don't call us, we'll call you.

I would talk in a manner that emphasizes that I am bull****ting her just to be funny.

You see, after she flacked your image has been lowered a little, but just a little. You need something to recover. So again you are taking the initiative to give her a specific option for the day you will meet and you are being funny.

if she says "Sorry I can't at Thursday, how about Wednesday" you can say "Uh ok, I will make the sacrifice but I will pick the place where we will go"

Again this is how I would handle the situation.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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vonbock

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guru: I like your point. We did talk at a dinner for about 15 minutes, 4 days before I called. I thought we had hit it off pretty good. Not great but ok.


But I like the confident way of thinking, they have to prove to you, rather than me prove to them. One thing i can't figure out is, I would say 90% of guys out there are AFC, how did they wind up marrying a girl or finding one?

Pepe: I love your lines, I just got to learn to be a little more humerous with it
 

ready123

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Vonbock, if you don't have a solid model in your head about how to set up a Day 2 and can't understand flaking and why girls act the way they do, I recommend you buy the RSD Foundations video. It should help you a lot.
 

vonbock

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update here, she just called me this afternoon after work. Said sorry for not responding back to me, but yes she can make it tomorrow at 7pm. Coffee or dinner either way. Call her or text message her whenever I get a chance. Should I even call her back?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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TopPlayerette

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vonbock said:
I met a girl last week, I got her number. CAlled her 3 days later on Wednesday, spoke 5 minutes, and set up for coffee on Saturday night. She said sure. Well, text messages me today and says something came up and can we reschedule for another time. I offered tomorrow afternoon but she text messaged back saying can't do since it is Fathers day but her father lives 400 miles away. She said how about a weekday night if I am available.

Reading this board, people would say say don't message back and just forget about her. If she was really interested, she would have not flaked.
My friends told me to give her one more chance and if she flakes a second time then forget her. I feel like I amsetting myself up for more punishment. Should I give her one more chance?
Of course. You barely know her. She could be a playerette or maybe not. Maybe her parents were visiting her for father's day? Or maybe her best friend needed her help? Maybe she has to work shifts at work? She has a life too you know. If she was a big jerk, she would have cancelled and told you that she is busy but she'll call you sometime. And of course after that she would not call you.
I think she is interested but something really came up. Give her another chance and check her out. After that you can judge her.
 

ready123

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vonbock said:
update here, she just called me this afternoon after work. Said sorry for not responding back to me, but yes she can make it tomorrow at 7pm. Coffee or dinner either way. Call her or text message her whenever I get a chance. Should I even call her back?
generally speaking, girls are not nasty human beings out to fvck with guys heads. the way they act - flaking, testing, etc - even though it seems disrespectful on a surface level, it's how they deal with the hordes of needy guys hitting on them every day and trying to take validation from them

call her back, confirm, and go meet her up tomorrow. and have fun

and go watch RSD Foundations when you get the chance
 

vonbock

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here's the update.

I call her back. I asked how weekend was. First words out of her mouth was that she had to cancel because she had to go out with her boyfriend and his father. She said it was either potential fututre father in law or friend. She had to pick potential father in law. ?????? I know now why she was busy fathers day, It was her boyfriends father. Why the heck would she say she would go to coffee on Saturday night with me if she had a boyfriend? Hey we have a lot in common though, I think I will hold on to her as friend, who knows how many friends she has. She told me that she has friends that she can introduce me to.

We just talked, I acted nonchalant, oh cool you got a boyfriend. Problem is, when she said boyfriend, I relaxed and didn't give a sh*t anymore. I talked to her just as a friend. We talked for 2 hours(I know, no talking long on the phone but hey we're friends). I said my BS, she said her BS but conversation went great though. She said her boyfriend is in between jobs a.k.a no job. She is Asian but yet she says she thinks most likely she is going to marry a white guy????? This girl is 28. She is a law studnt. I have a strange feeling she is holding on to this guy and if a better one comes along who fits her status, she will dump this guy.

Man the games girls play.
 
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drtk

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vonbock said:
here's the update.

I call her back. I asked how weekend was. First words out of her mouth was that she had to cancel because she had to go out with her boyfriend and his father. She said it was either potential fututre father in law or friend. She had to pick potential father in law. ?????? I know now why she was busy fathers day, It was her boyfriends father. Why the heck would she say she would go to coffee on Saturday night with me if she had a boyfriend? Hey we have a lot in common though, I think I will hold on to her as friend, who knows how many friends she has. She told me that she has friends that she can introduce me to.

We just talked, I acted nonchalant, oh cool you got a boyfriend. Problem is, when she said boyfriend, I relaxed and didn't give a sh*t anymore. I talked to her just as a friend. We talked for 2 hours(I know, no talking long on the phone but hey we're friends). I said my BS, she said her BS but conversation went great though. She said her boyfriend is in between jobs a.k.a no job. She is Asian but yet she says she thinks most likely she is going to marry a white guy?????

Man the games girls play.
Indeed. Don't next her yet though, let her introduce you to other girls and see if you can get anything out of this. If you're not interested in that, then I'd next her right away.
 

ready123

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you did good in not reacting and being cool even though she dropped a bomb. keep her as a friend if you can genuinely have fun with her without jocking her

vonbock said:
Why the heck would she say she would go to coffee on Saturday night with me if she had a boyfriend?
that's a good question to think about. if you guys are friends, you can ask her and she'll tell you the answer
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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TopPlayerette

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ready123 said:
you did good in not reacting and being cool even though she dropped a bomb. keep her as a friend if you can genuinely have fun with her without jocking her



that's a good question to think about. if you guys are friends, you can ask her and she'll tell you the answer

She probably has issues with her boyfriend and she is intending to use you as a "back up". Many women do that secretively but she was honest with you and told you upfront.
If you stick around long enough, she will tell you about her problems with her boyfriend. Trust me.
But of course it's your call.
 

vonbock

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Ready: I know, when she dropped the bomb, first I stayed quiet and just stayed cool, regained my composure. Then I realized, hey I can't have her so what the heck, have fun with her and our conversations were so fun. I don't go after other guys gf's.

topplayerrette: I know, but just have fun with her, hang out and see if she has other female friends I can meet. I learned one big thing on sosuave. Why next a girl, unless of course she never responds to my calls, when there is a potential you might meet her friends. Boy, I have met many girls this way.
 
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