"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Need help with something.

ConfidentDon

Don Juan
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I have a question. My problem seems to be that I'll go out to the bars on my own (no wing man no friends etc. I find it easier to do my thing that way call me weird) and chat up a few girls but the problem that I've always had is working a room.

By that I mean staying in one bar talking to a whole bunch of chicks that are all in the same room. I usally get into a good convo with one then leave to talk to another one then come back later.

Am I doing this right? And I should just expand and do the same with many woman. Or should I keep my convo's shorter?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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tactic

Master Don Juan
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Keep it as long as it's good.
 

ConfidentDon

Don Juan
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ok maybe my question should be "How do I talk to all these girls without them watching me talk to these girls and think that I'm a player?"
 

Eyes_Of_Fire

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I'm using a similar approach and it seems to work for a few reasons. First of all, before I decided on my style, I reviewed a few fundamental things in my head.

1) Be seen talking to lots of people. When you are by yourself, this can give you the social proof you need. If you are talking to one girl, then, later in the night she sees you talking to another, now she might get a little jealous and see you as the prize. Make sure you throw talking to other guys into the mix. Great way to possibly make a new friend, AND social proof.
2) Be a MAN. That does not mean hanging onto one woman all night long. The goal is to socialize and have a good time.
3) If you talk to one girl, and she wasn't too intrested in you the first time, chances are if you talk to her a second time (later in the evening, another night, etc.), she'll have a feeling of knowing you from somewhere (and since girls run on emotion...). This is simply based upon associative memory.
4) HAve fun! The point is not to get laid (ok, maybe a little) but to have a good time meeting people and riding life to its fullest.

When I take all of the above into consideration, fear level drops (after my first 1 or 2 approaches) and I loosen up and am able to just be myself. If I go into the bar/club/wherever with the idea of getting numbers and/or getting laid, then I usually walk home empty handed or with a flake's #. So keep doing what you're doing, and if something or all of it isn't working out, don't be afraid to switch things up and try something new.

Eyes_Of_Fire

BTW: There are exceptions to every rule, so don't be afraid to use your best judgement and bend the rules to fit the situation.
 
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