Need Help fixing this problem

[Chillyman]

Okay recently went to prom with this girl i think is a ten, but because of this i was hesitant throughout half of it. after a while i warmed up and got close to her, she responded positively. Buuuuuuuut when we were walking out to my car i gave her the top to my suit to keep her warm, she kept pressing up against me, and me being the social outcast who never had a date before didn't know what to do.

When we got to my car i opened the door for her she got into my car and openly started flirting with me and started singing along to the song that was currently playing "One more time -Daft Punk" which lead me to sing along also.

When we got to her house, she said she had a great night and lingered in my car for a little bit (with me not picking up the obvious clues like usual) she said goodbye and i'll see you monday, and ran to her door.

Now afterwards it all came rushing back to me, and i realized i messed up BIG TIME. So here comes Monday, and she acts all the same, and as we are walking out to our cars i decide to ask her the question:

"So is there any chance at a relationship here?"

Her response?

"Listen i don't want to date in high school with all the drama, and i really like you as a friend and don't want to lose that...because i really like hanging out with you, your a nice guy."

The problem is I know that she wants to do a relationship, but is trying to bar herself from it because she lives with her mom four hours away during the summer. but i know for certain that she likes me. The only slight problem is that i have APD (Avoidant Personality Disorder) I always second guess myself, ridicule myself, and will often times come up with lies about why i can't be with her, or that the people i like are doing behind my back. (like being unloyal why i keep thinking this last one i dunno)

After reading several guides from this site (after having to explain to my best friend what the friendzone is) I realized how bad i am in dates, and i have made several big mistakes that could've prolly lead to a relationship or at least a fling.

ANYWAYS back to the main story. this leaves me with several options:

1. take this as a defeat, and try to forget about her.
2. Break out of the Friend zone, and claim the Prize.
3. take her as a friend (which will be very hard)
4. try to go out with other people (i really can't do this being an atheist in a very religious town its very hard getting a date as everyone knows i am *those damn little birds!*)

i personally want to do #2 mainly because since chances are we will hardly see each other during the summer, giving me large amounts of time to change my appearance and attitude, and completely surprise her. *i should prolly mention that she is the exception, while she is religious *to an extent* she isn't Christian but a Wiccan,*

 

[Chillyman]

We're *group of friends also going to the new wolverine origins movie this friday, and next week were all planning (a group of friends also) to go to the nearest SCEA (boffing) tourney in a nearby town.

 

[Analyzeit]

Just as a warning heaps of people are going to post on this saying:

You Have Oneitis, get over her.

It's really hard to get out of the friend zone, don't bother.

And she said "Listen i don't want to date in high school with all the drama, and i really like you as a friend and don't want to lose that...because i really like hanging out with you, your a nice guy."

And that comment sounds like either she plain doesn't want to go out with you and next month she will have a boyfriend and you'll still be a friend/Emotional Tampon or that your firmly and she has told you this, that your very deep in the friend zone

Now I'm SURE (if you haven't, do!) you've read some articles and a few threads and you will immediately understand why i've just said this because your problem is very common.

But if you've studied what oneitis is and you've studied what the friendzone is and how to know your in it and you really think you don't have oneitis or you really don't think your FIRMLY in the friend zone then try number 2 but at the same time you really should do number 4 and i don't want to hear your sh!tty story about religion and how it hard to find girls that ain't. That sounds like pvssy talk to me

If nothing has happened after at least a month, there's no point trying after that become her friend and get to know all her (hot female) friends.

But honestly you can keep trying, people do get out of the friend zone. 2 weeks ago i got out of a 2 year friend zone and i was trying to be honest but what i did and you should to is have other girls there to and just have her as a long term goal or a possibility. I'm a lot easier on guys that ask this question then other advice givers, Do go for her but just don't let her hinder your relationship with other girls! if you let her do this then you just screwed yourself over and you'll realize this if you just have this one girl on the table for a long time and you will be p!ssed off thats why i'm telling you now!

There is a possibility and a good one that you will be in the friend zone for ever so do not have her as your only one and only option

 

[intrextrovert]

Get her drunk and make a move or just wait until she's showing you interest again. I wouldn't hold my breath on her, just be a guy and take the opportunity if it's ever there.

And just kiss her when you're feeling it, no talking bs

 

[Chillyman]

Just as a warning heaps of people are going to post on this saying:

You Have Oneitis, get over her.

It's really hard to get out of the friend zone, don't bother.

And she said "Listen i don't want to date in high school with all the drama, and i really like you as a friend and don't want to lose that...because i really like hanging out with you, your a nice guy."

And that comment sounds like either she plain doesn't want to go out with you and next month she will have a boyfriend and you'll still be a friend/Emotional Tampon or that your firmly and she has told you this, that your very deep in the friend zone

Now I'm SURE (if you haven't, do!) you've read some articles and a few threads and you will immediately understand why i've just said this because your problem is very common.

But if you've studied what oneitis is and you've studied what the friendzone is and how to know your in it and you really think you don't have oneitis or you really don't think your FIRMLY in the friend zone then try number 2 but at the same time you really should do number 4 and i don't want to hear your sh!tty story about religion and how it hard to find girls that ain't. That sounds like pvssy talk to me

If nothing has happened after at least a month, there's no point trying after that become her friend and get to know all her (hot female) friends.

But honestly you can keep trying, people do get out of the friend zone. 2 weeks ago i got out of a 2 year friend zone and i was trying to be honest but what i did and you should to is have other girls there to and just have her as a long term goal or a possibility. I'm a lot easier on guys that ask this question then other advice givers, Do go for her but just don't let her hinder your relationship with other girls! if you let her do this then you just screwed yourself over and you'll realize this if you just have this one girl on the table for a long time and you will be p!ssed off thats why i'm telling you now!

There is a possibility and a good one that you will be in the friend zone for ever so do not have her as your only one and only option

hmm you bring up some valid points, but i know for certain this isn't oneitis, I've had oneitis before, and it lead to me being used very badly, Even though it sounds like oneitis by how i wrote it, heh its not, the last girl i was chasing after kinda beat that oneitis=bad.

 

[Chillyman]

and chances are i won't be able to pick up on any girls *at least the good looking ones* they don't tend to hang around places i do. so really this is just to keep me occupied as a get better looking scheme with a potential payoff that i'd like. If it doesn't work like what i want it to, so what i'll at least have a friend, and hopefully will look better for the other girls.

 

[Chillyman]

hmm after some thought i might have fallen into oneitis, but with it being so near the end of the school year I tend to get demoralized when it comes to girl for some reason.


any ways to fix this?