"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Need help figuring this out...

hhlowin

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Hey i really am not good at analyzing these types of things so i need someone to help me out here. I think i got it figured out im just not completely sure. ok heres the situation:

There's this girl i have known for a month or two. We see each other usually on a daily basis. Anyways i wasnt interested in her at first but then the attraction started to build and the attraction increased for me. I just dont know if she thinks of me in the friend view or as more. Like we always have a lot of eye contact and we flirt a Lot and we will tickle each other and all sorts of things but then other times she doesnt seem interested at all. i dont know if she's throwing me for a loop or what. like a few days ago i took a sweat band of hers and wasnt giving it to her back on the bus so she came into the seat and we were wrestling for it and we would try to tickle each other to get it. Im pretty sure this means she has some moderate level of interest but im really not sure about it because other times she like wont even make an attempt to talk to me and kind of just seem like shes trying to play hard to get because i catch her staring at me a lot. im kinda confused what do you guys think?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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check_mate_kid_uk

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seems like she likes you, but tell me...how long have you known her for? as this plays a part in it!
 

ohiofutballa

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ok well, you like the girl right?????? Then why are you asking us, just get out there and ask her out. You dont need a play by play analysis:cool:
 

Osiris7250

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she likes you, shes just playn games with you though. you try it; ignore her for a couple of days and see how she reacts. and when she does it to you let her know you dont give a **** and go talk to other girls or guys...

now go and read the bible
 

Porky

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Originally posted by Osiris7250
she likes you, shes just playn games with you though. you try it; ignore her for a couple of days and see how she reacts. and when she does it to you let her know you dont give a **** and go talk to other girls or guys...

now go and read the bible
forget that. ask her out. you've seen what you want, assume you already have it and act like it is yours.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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hhlowin

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Originally posted by check_mate_kid_uk
seems like she likes you, but tell me...how long have you known her for? as this plays a part in it!
I've known her about when school started so about 2 months
 

wcknightjr

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This seems like an ideal situation, except for the fact that it seems like you're 16 at the oldest. Once you get a little older you'll wish girls were giving you these types of signs because you'll know how to react then! Fortunately, you found this site and if you're a quick study you won't do all the AFC things that send girls running for the hills.

Net time you talk to her ACT like you know she likes you. Try to communicate that you've got her cornered, but do go blabbering that you like her and all that mushy stuff. Let her wonder if you feel the same.

Remember, when she backs off and doesn't go after you all the time:
a) she's on her period/ having a bad day
b) she's playing hard to get or
c) she's waitin on you, bud

Act accordingly
 

idiot_boyfriend

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I think I can help:

First, read the bible.

Second, ask her out.
 

hhlowin

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Originally posted by wcknightjr
This seems like an ideal situation, except for the fact that it seems like you're 16 at the oldest. Once you get a little older you'll wish girls were giving you these types of signs because you'll know how to react then! Fortunately, you found this site and if you're a quick study you won't do all the AFC things that send girls running for the hills.

Net time you talk to her ACT like you know she likes you. Try to communicate that you've got her cornered, but do go blabbering that you like her and all that mushy stuff. Let her wonder if you feel the same.

Remember, when she backs off and doesn't go after you all the time:
a) she's on her period/ having a bad day
b) she's playing hard to get or
c) she's waitin on you, bud

Act accordingly
**** you read the situation perfectly, but i didnt get your advice soon enough. it was a wierd situation but we both told each other we liked each other and now we are like in an ackward position. i asked her out and she said yes but no, so im wanderin if i can salvage it. she said we can try it out but dont consider it b/f g/f thing yet. cuz i dont really see her in school anymore and it has just gotten wierd. i do have another girl that wants to go out with me so im not too desperate. i can walk away with another girl. but eh... i dunno... any advice????
 

hhlowin

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btw im not usually the guy who does that, she just had control of me and now i feel like i messed it up cuz now she has a lot of control. im confused what would you guys do?
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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wcknightjr

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Okay, darn it was too late. Hmmm... I think now it's your turn to switch things around on her. Don't call her until she calls you! That should get her back in your court. If she never takes the initiative to call you, it was already a wash and you saved yourself some time. If she does call you, then casually ask her if she wants to go get some coffee on x day at x time. If she says she don't like coffee that's BS cuz they got other stuff so ya next her. If she declines and doesn't at least hint at a later date, same thing.

Approach this one like ya got one foot out the door and if she likes you she'll find a way for you to stay.
 

LikRetsam

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Originally posted by wcknightjr
This seems like an ideal situation, except for the fact that it seems like you're 16 at the oldest. Once you get a little older you'll wish girls were giving you these types of signs because you'll know how to react then!
[...]

Remember, when she backs off and doesn't go after you all the time:
a) she's on her period/ having a bad day
b) she's playing hard to get or
c) she's waitin on you, bud
Shut up, read up. 'Except for the fact that you're 16....'
Dude, you are filled with so much crap that you just spit out without ever thinking about. You are a copy of an imitation. You are not the first and far from the last. The problem is you've regressed so far back into the darkness that the light hurts your eyes.


To the original poster, listen to Porky.
 

LikRetsam

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Originally posted by wcknightjr
Don't call her until she calls you! That should get her back in your court. If she never takes the initiative to call you, it was already a wash and you saved yourself some time. If she does call you, then casually ask her if she wants to go get some coffee on x day at x time. If she says she don't like coffee that's BS cuz they got other stuff so ya next her.
Sigh. Advice like this should be kept for deaf ears.

To the original poster: This girl eather considers you no more than a friend or once had interrest in you but you didn't act so she put you in the friend category. In eather case, you are merely her friend.

I suggest you read a bit of the bible before persuing other ladies.
 

aBAzLLnA

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To those (newbies) who are reading this, take this as a lesson. Do NOT overanalyze the way hhlowin has. Many times it is a waste of energy. Good advice is here except for wcknightjr's. Read up.
 
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