"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Need Expert DJ Advice--Cold Approaches

Brian Drake

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Hi, guys. I'm new to the forum and enjoying it so far, and I hope y'all can provide some needed advice. I have just come out of a six month relationship with a girl and my head is quite messed up (wasn't my decision to part); however, I am rebuilding my confidence and have an opportunity this weekend to attend a wedding where there may be plenty of single women to interact with.

My problem is, I've never gone into a situation like this cold. In the past, the women I have dated have come from my general social circle, so there has never been a need for "intro lines" or anything like that, which means I am untrained in that area.

For those DJs who have gone stag to events and proceeded to collect phone numbers, hook up, whatever, what is the best way to approach these new targets of opportunity? I'm reading up on conversation starters, and since it's a wedding the bride and groom can be an ice breaker, but I'm looking for expert opinions.

Thanks, guys!
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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vatoloco

Master Don Juan
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Brian Drake said:
I'm reading up on conversation starters, and since it's a wedding the bride and groom can be an ice breaker, but I'm looking for expert opinions.
"Sooooo, did you sleep with the groom too?" Works wonders for me! :D

Haha! Just fvcking with you, man! I'd love to give you detailed advice but unfortunately you...
...have just come out of a six month relationship with a girl and my head is quite messed up (wasn't my decision to part);
so your emotions all over the place right now.

My best advice for you right now is to hit the "End" key on your keyboard and read the DJ Bible. Don't even worry about this wedding. You are not at the stage where you can efficiently work a wedding.

Good luck to you man.
 

Brian Drake

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You know what? I think you might have a point. I do have a sense of "hurry up and get another girl" going through my head which is probably a bad thing, right? Thanks for the wake-up.
 

theunflushables

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Vataloco is right, take some time for yourself. You don't need to be looking for the next girl right away. Take care of yourself first.

However, this shouldn't stop you from being social at the wedding. Talk with everybody. You don't need to have an objective in mind other than to have fun. Who knows, you might make some new friends to hang out or networking connections for your profession (or future profession if still in school). And if anything, its good practice for when you are ready to get back out there again.
 

vatoloco

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Brian Drake said:
You know what? I think you might have a point. I do have a sense of "hurry up and get another girl" going through my head which is probably a bad thing, right? Thanks for the wake-up.
Hey, you get kudos for realizing your current state. Most guys would be like "OMG! I need to get me a new girl asap! I CAN'T STAND TO BE ALONE!!"

Like our unflushable friend has already mentioned, just go to the wedding and have a good time with your friends. Don't even worry about picking up girls. Don't attend the wedding with the "I need to get me girl now!" mentality. Women have this 6th sense that picks up a man's desperation and makes them run for the hills.

Now, if a girl is constantly trying to talk to you and/or repeatedly asking you to dance, then you have a live one and you need to number close and/or kiss-/fvck-close, depending on the situation. :up:

Good luck!
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

schttrj

Master Don Juan
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Mar 26, 2008
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Brian Drake said:
Hi, guys. I'm new to the forum and enjoying it so far, and I hope y'all can provide some needed advice. I have just come out of a six month relationship with a girl and my head is quite messed up (wasn't my decision to part); however, I am rebuilding my confidence and have an opportunity this weekend to attend a wedding where there may be plenty of single women to interact with.

My problem is, I've never gone into a situation like this cold. In the past, the women I have dated have come from my general social circle, so there has never been a need for "intro lines" or anything like that, which means I am untrained in that area.

For those DJs who have gone stag to events and proceeded to collect phone numbers, hook up, whatever, what is the best way to approach these new targets of opportunity? I'm reading up on conversation starters, and since it's a wedding the bride and groom can be an ice breaker, but I'm looking for expert opinions.

Thanks, guys!
Opener: Hi
Attitude: Calm and Normal
Belief: She wants you to approach her and may be she is going to be your future wife someday
 
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