Need advice

[luber873]

Second post here. Need advice about a situation with the girl that brought me here. Girl I work with was super interested, would move mountains to see me, sex, etc but was hot/cold, didn't know if she wanted a relationship. We saw each other for a month until she broke plans with me and I went super AFC and acted like an idiot by blowing up her phone. So she said we'd never be anything after that.

No contact for about a month or so and I'm working other chicks. We had a work HH recently where she initiates convo and we reconnect. At the bar she initiates dancing and is very flirtatious. She also dances with another guy from work and he kisses her (I didn't care since we aren't anything and act totally indifferent). It's like she was testing to see if I'd get jealous by dancing with this other guy. When I dance/flirt with other girls she gets jealous, comes and smacks my ass, and is waiting until I'm done with other girls to dance with me. We end up leaving together and she keeps saying "I really like you" (we were both pretty drunk).

So I give her a ride home the next day and she says "let's talk soon." This was a few days ago and we haven't contacted since. Do I hit her up today and say let's get a drink, meet at my place to chat?? How would you guys handle the next move?

 

[SeymourCake]

I would not accept the behavior she was trying to do to you at the club to get you jealous. I would ignore her for a week or two. That will drive her insane. In the meanwhile, spin some plates.

 

[luber873]

Bump.

So I shot her a text to chill and got the "Sunday dinner with family response." I replied "cool. Later this week." She said that sounds good. Do I let her initiate?

 

[zinc4]

i would just let her come to me and focus on other chicks...

 

[luber873]

I expected more than two responses lol. Difficult situation?

 

[Cremasta]

(I didn't care since we aren't anything and act totally indifferent).

You didn't happen to notice that this part of your game worked best did you? You know what to do, you just need to be consistent.

Make her work!

 

[VladPatton]

Common situation. Try not to be eager. Let the relationship takes it's course. Don't push for anything. Not all girls wanna get wifed up and be married in a year. Go out with her, bang her, have some fun, and take each outing as it's own entity. Keep texting to a minimum and use it just for setting up dates rather than lengthy communication. Save that for face to face. Be willing to walk if she is done with you, or when you yourself have had enough.

 

[HalfPUAHalfAFC]

She said "let's talk soon", not you.

Why would you contact her to set up this talk? That's her job.

Your work is done.

In fact, if she does contact you for "the talk", it will be best if you are too busy to see her then. If you jump at the day/time of her suggestion, the frame is still all her's.

She's playing with you (add on her jealously ploy). You gotta show you have a backbone.

My advice is one of two things: (1) If she contacts with something like "hey, let's meet for drinks tomorrow and talk", just tell her you're busy then and suggest another time a few days from then. If she REALLY wants to talk, she'll agree.

(2) If she texts you, wait an hour or two and text back, "call me". That's it. If she does, then you start off (with a bit of aloofness), "So, you wanted to talk. What's up?" And let her go on with whatever inane hamstering she's gonna throw at you.

You gotta get her to comply with your desires and demands to even have this talk. Quit chasing her.

If you get it to the point of actually having a conversation, she'll make it all your fault. Be ready for that.

Don't argue with her. Hear her out, tell her you do not cotton to such games and behavior and if she'd like to hang out again, set your terms. If she refuses to play along, wish her luck, no hard feelings, and tell her you're going to pursue other options. She's gonna have to chase you know and prove her worth. If she doesn't want to, she wasn't worth the time anyway.

That conversation should be no more than 5-10 minutes tops.

 

[luber873]

It should be noted she didn't mean "the talk". I posted about this chick a while back. We work together and she was showing a lot of interested. Hung out a few times, went on 1 date, but moved very fast. We were spending 3-4 days a week together within the first month, sex, basically gave me every sign she wanted a relationship. Would pick me up (don't have a car), cook for me (breakfast/dinner), would buy me things, etc. Then she broke plans with me and caused drama when we saw each other out so I acted like an idiot by blowing up her phone with stupid texts.

NC for awhile and we meet at this HH. She was displaying the intent of making me jealous but came back with me and it wasn't awkward at all. We just seem to "click".

 

[GotED?]

How old are you and this girl?

Sounds like high school love sh!t or immature 20-25yr old dumbarse sh!t.

Lots of immaturity and game playing involved. Do you really want this kind of girl to fook your mind day and night if you get in too deep??

If you want to play the King, then you got your Drama Queen.

Watch and guard your emotional investment, never be invested emotionally.

Exodus

 

[luber873]

"Sounds like high school love sh!t or immature 20-25yr old dumbarse sh!t."

Both in the latter age bracket. I'd say I'm mature, but just have stupid AFC moments like us all. I didn't discover/read/care about anything this site teaches until this girl. Dating this chick was a shock to the system.

 

[luber873]

Quick update here to get y'all's thoughts. She randomly dropped by my office mid week to say hi and we chatted for a bit. Went on a 30 min walk together and it was not awkward at all. She brought up numerous things we used to do together, complimented me by saying I look more muscular/fit, and was laughing/joking with me.

Is she maybe interested again?