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Need advice, she said she's going on a date

vier20

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Hi, I'm in need of some advice. I'm in the process of getting to know a girl, a HB 9. We're in the really really early stages, exchanged phone numbers and getting to know each other.

So today she wrote me an email, casually mentioning that she has a date for Sunday. That's it, no more detail. Then she said I should call her monday because she hadn't talk to me at all this week. We have some distance between where we live, so it's not easy for me to take her out.

I take it that means that she's still interested in me, and that she's just dating around because we're not in a point in the relationship where we can't date around anymore. I need to email her back, so how should I respond in a way that shows that I'm not threatened by her going on this date? Should I make light of the situation, by somehow being ****y and funny?

Thanks for the responses, you guys are great!!
 

Porky

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She's playing mind games with you and you guys haven't even gone out yet.
 
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Why did you exchange numbers? Not to be 'friends' I hope!

Call her and do not mention the date with this other dude (I assume it's a dude - can't assume nowadays).

Call her and meet halfway - if she is interested she'll make the effort!

Communicate thru phone and not e-mail.
 

backbreaker

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Do what I do.

LIE!!!

Say, "Are you serious? I have a date too. I hope yours goes well, as I do hope mine goes well too" or something along thoose lines.


I think she is interested, but this is a classic mind trick pretty women use to weed out the non-contenders. Most chumps get fustrated and dwell on the fact that a pretty woman has a date. Hell, I am suprised when a pretty woman doesn't have a LTR, I am greatful when they are just dating other people.

Besides, do you really want a girl that is home by herself every night? We are s upposed to be chasing the best of the best, not the leftovers.
 

vier20

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Thanks for all the suggestions!

I agree with you that she is playing mind tricks. She's pretty and she knows it. So I guess I will first write back to her, saying something like "Have a good time, try not to think about me the whole time during the date". Is that a good idea?

And I probably won't call her, and let her call me. But what if she doesn't call? Should I call her, or NEXT her?
 

Pimp-sicle

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Originally posted by vier20
Thanks for all the suggestions!

I agree with you that she is playing mind tricks. She's pretty and she knows it. So I guess I will first write back to her, saying something like "Have a good time, try not to think about me the whole time during the date". Is that a good idea?

And I probably won't call her, and let her call me. But what if she doesn't call? Should I call her, or NEXT her?

Uhh...did you not listen to the advice that was just given to you? Respond back, but DO NOT ACKNOWLEDGE THE DATE!!!!! Makes you look a little insecure. Just make it short, witty and to the point. Tell her to have a great weekend and end the e-mail. Call her Monday and set something up. If she flakes or tells you she can't make it, then leave the ball in her court. After all she did tell you that she'd have time Monday, so if she suddenly doesn't, then don't make an effort.


And FYI, your NOT in a relationship with this girl, you 2 exchanged #'s. That don't me shiat, unless she goes out with you. She's definitely playing the game to try and get a jealous reaction, hell she's trying HARD for you to react to the fact that she has a date. Don't mention it though, shows her that your calm, and unphased by her games. Don't lie and say you have a date to, that will come off as fake and you trying to one up her. Let her boast about dates all she wants, and you my friend should be out getting more #'s. If you go on a date, DON'T SAY ANYTHING. Just let her play her game and you play the women and like magic, they'll all want you because your not begging for their time.



PIMP
 

vier20

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You're right, I see the light now :) That's exactly the mindset that I want to get into, not to be phased by her little games. I'll definitely go out and get other #s. That will help with not worrying about her going on a date.

From all you DJs experience, is it to be expected that pretty girls play these kinds of games?
 

Dictatorsaurus

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It seems to me that you are her "backup" plan. If things don't go too well during her date, she wants to try you out (Just like trying shoes out before chosing a pair).

If I were you, I would give her a call and ask HER to call you on Monday. She has a phone and she certainly knows how to use the darn thing. If she doesn't call you on Monday, that would show that she is either not interested or playing mind games. And in that case, you're better off without her. Beauty is important, but it is not everything.
 

What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.

You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Chrispy

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There was this girl that told the guy she had a date that evening and could not go out with him. The guy shrugged it off and asked what she was doing after that date.

Moral of the story? Shrug it off, ask her out, and see if she wants to go. If not, then you 'next'...
 

vier20

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Update on the story:

She emailed me after her date, and proceeded to tell me that it went ok, but doubt there will be a second one.

So I guess that's my cue to make my move right? I plan to call her or have her call me, and talk about her weekend, without even mentioning the date. Although I'm a little curious because it was a guy she met on the internet. Now I feel like a backup though, like what Dictatorsaurus said...

Thanks for all the good point of views!
 

Dictatorsaurus

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Since she said there won't be another date, it probably didn't go well. Or else, she would have gone out again.

The hardest steps for guys are the first few ones because sadlly, one wrong move and things can turn ugly.

You don't need to mention the date with her. What you have to do is show her that you have dignity and you don't put up with crap. Next time you see her, be nice and fair. But don't feel it is your responsibility to entertain her. I have learned that the more I let go and the less I care, the more successful I become. I have learned that after making alot of mistakes.

Good luck.
 
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