Hi,
I've been an afc all my life. I had relationships and flings here and there but never anything serious, I had ED (pretty damn certain it's porn induced now) and it affected me more than I realized at first. Since the last two times I've been unsuccessfully with a women I've avoided any situation which could have led to sex.
Anyway, not this summer but the one before I reconnected with a work college who I liked and we went on a couple of dates, maybe 5 times. Even though looking back I realize she was really into me, at the time I always convinced myself that she wasn't and being a total AFC I never made a move because I was scared of rejection. Evidently she lost interest and things died down for a while. We never talked about what happened but we stayed friends (working at the same place again and being into the same music scene helped), but only saw eachother in groups not just the two of us.
I've been reading sosuave, the book of pook and other similar stuff over the last month or so and I also stopped porn and masturbation early january to help with the ED.
Lately I liked the vibe between us when we saw eachother. Last friday I asked her if she wanted to hang out and she invited me to her place to hang out and watch a movie. When I left to get there I told myself I wouldn't leave without making a move, that I'd act like a man with her for once and that I'd use some of the stuff I read. But when I got there I was back to my loser self. Overanalysed stupid little things again and convinced myself she's wasn't interested and did nothing again. At least this time I saw what I was doing wrong while I was doing it but I did nothing to stop myself.
Today we were talking on facebook and she said jokingly about something that "it's ok i'm patient", I couldn't help but think maybe it had a double meaning and she was also referring also to my non action when we're together. I still think she does like me and that I could still have a chance with her but I always freeze when we're alone together. Since I always do this I kind of want to address this by writing at least at first, tell her that yes I know and realize I act like a retarded dumbass with her. We never adressed the subject before, never talked about it and I think we need to break the ice. And just so we're clear, no it wouldn't be a huge declaration of love or anything like that. good or bad idea?
A bit about her to give more context. I don't think she's the type of girl who gets hits on alot, she's kind of shy, I think she's beautiful but not the type that most guys will notice when they pass her by. I know she's not into the player type and she didn't have a boyfriend in a while and has no problem being alone. She's smart and won't fall for stupid games, she's sees through it.
I've been an afc all my life. I had relationships and flings here and there but never anything serious, I had ED (pretty damn certain it's porn induced now) and it affected me more than I realized at first. Since the last two times I've been unsuccessfully with a women I've avoided any situation which could have led to sex.
Anyway, not this summer but the one before I reconnected with a work college who I liked and we went on a couple of dates, maybe 5 times. Even though looking back I realize she was really into me, at the time I always convinced myself that she wasn't and being a total AFC I never made a move because I was scared of rejection. Evidently she lost interest and things died down for a while. We never talked about what happened but we stayed friends (working at the same place again and being into the same music scene helped), but only saw eachother in groups not just the two of us.
I've been reading sosuave, the book of pook and other similar stuff over the last month or so and I also stopped porn and masturbation early january to help with the ED.
Lately I liked the vibe between us when we saw eachother. Last friday I asked her if she wanted to hang out and she invited me to her place to hang out and watch a movie. When I left to get there I told myself I wouldn't leave without making a move, that I'd act like a man with her for once and that I'd use some of the stuff I read. But when I got there I was back to my loser self. Overanalysed stupid little things again and convinced myself she's wasn't interested and did nothing again. At least this time I saw what I was doing wrong while I was doing it but I did nothing to stop myself.
Today we were talking on facebook and she said jokingly about something that "it's ok i'm patient", I couldn't help but think maybe it had a double meaning and she was also referring also to my non action when we're together. I still think she does like me and that I could still have a chance with her but I always freeze when we're alone together. Since I always do this I kind of want to address this by writing at least at first, tell her that yes I know and realize I act like a retarded dumbass with her. We never adressed the subject before, never talked about it and I think we need to break the ice. And just so we're clear, no it wouldn't be a huge declaration of love or anything like that. good or bad idea?
A bit about her to give more context. I don't think she's the type of girl who gets hits on alot, she's kind of shy, I think she's beautiful but not the type that most guys will notice when they pass her by. I know she's not into the player type and she didn't have a boyfriend in a while and has no problem being alone. She's smart and won't fall for stupid games, she's sees through it.
. Be more observing of what she does when she's with you, remember your gut won't lie to you. You could either be discouraged because she might actually be sending signs that she doesn't want you or you are just really scared of rejection. I'm quite sure she likes you, but you might be in the friendzone or borderlining it.