"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

need advice for this situation

D

dj ben2

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 2, 2006
Messages
341
Reaction score
3
Location
sydney, australia
ok so i have been seeing this girl for about a month, we've known each other for few years but we started going out not long ago and everything ws going well, she was pursuing me and i was the prize. unfortunately i got drunk on a few occasions and let it be known to her my feelings too soon, showed a bit of neediness and things have been going downhill. not long ago i got the LJBF speech how she doesnt feel the vibe anymore and i pretty much just said yeah whatever thats cool i dont care.
now in these situations i usually just cut all ties and only talk to them when they make contact and start going out again.
problem is shes coming to bali with me and my family in a week and a half for 2 weeks and doing this wont be possible. plus we're going to be in the same room and bed =O lol question is i do actually still like her and i want to know how i should act while at bali without ruining my chnaces even MORE. i was thinking about completely changing my attitude and acting aloof, being friends with her but not showing any emotion like ive gotten over her already
i usually learn from my mistakes and dont ask for advice but this situation is quite the wierd one
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

I

iliketennis

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 19, 2009
Messages
300
Reaction score
8
be polite but don't talk to her much until the trip. then have some drinks
 
J

jophil28

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 18, 2006
Messages
5,216
Reaction score
278
Location
Gold Coast. Aust.
dj ben2 said:
..she was pursuing me and i was the prize. unfortunately i got drunk on a few occasions and let it be known to her my feelings too soon, showed a bit of neediness and things have been going downhill. not long ago i got the LJBF speech how she doesnt feel the vibe anymore and i pretty much just said yeah whatever thats cool i dont care.
Click to expand...
Who is that smug idiot on this board who preaches ," Alcohol = sex "
 
D

dj ben2

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 2, 2006
Messages
341
Reaction score
3
Location
sydney, australia
jophil28 said:
Who is that smug idiot on this board who preaches ," Alcohol = sex "
Click to expand...
alcohol giveth but also taketh away =D alcohol has got me laid many a time =D

im planning on just playing it cool and not showing any emotion towards her and if nothing changes in the 2 weeks we're there just dropping the idea of getting back with her. anyone else have any input?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

D

dj ben2

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 2, 2006
Messages
341
Reaction score
3
Location
sydney, australia
because i liked her and she is a really fun person who i wouldnt mind staying friends with anyway.... like i said we have known and been friends for quite some time. plus why are you quizzing me on somthing i havent even asked about?
 
W

Warrior74

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 25, 2008
Messages
5,106
Reaction score
230
dj ben2 said:
because i liked her and she is a really fun person who i wouldnt mind staying friends with anyway.... like i said we have known and been friends for quite some time. plus why are you quizzing me on somthing i havent even asked about?
Click to expand...
What? You are kidding me right? I know you are 19, but seriously, you need to grow a pair and tell her straight up, you booked this trip for you guys as a couple and it would just be awkward if she came now. Then invite someone else if you paid for it all. Trust me, she'll gladly take blue balling you, chumping you out and hopefully meeting some other guy on a vacation, its not awkward for her, but she knows it will be for you. Ruining your chances more? I see no chances to ruin.

I'm going to say it. You are skating on the edge of oneitis. Taking a chic who dumped you on a vacation with your family pushes you right over the edge.

Do what you normally do and make no exceptions. Treat her like you would any other girl who wasn't interested. Because she just treated you like she would any other guy she wasn't interested in. You doing anything more is chump behavior and everyone knows it. Time to be a man. Good luck son.
 
D

dj ben2

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 2, 2006
Messages
341
Reaction score
3
Location
sydney, australia
Warrior74 said:
What? You are kidding me right? I know you are 19, but seriously, you need to grow a pair and tell her straight up, you booked this trip for you guys as a couple and it would just be awkward if she came now. Then invite someone else if you paid for it all. Trust me, she'll gladly take blue balling you, chumping you out and hopefully meeting some other guy on a vacation, its not awkward for her, but she knows it will be for you. Ruining your chances more? I see no chances to ruin.

I'm going to say it. You are skating on the edge of oneitis. Taking a chic who dumped you on a vacation with your family pushes you right over the edge.

Do what you normally do and make no exceptions. Treat her like you would any other girl who wasn't interested. Because she just treated you like she would any other guy she wasn't interested in. You doing anything more is chump behavior and everyone knows it. Time to be a man. Good luck son.
Click to expand...
i usually would but circumstances alter exceptions. she paid for her own ticket. went halves in all accomodation and gets on with my mum who would not let me do something like that.... ive already stopped the texting and calling and she has already started calling me rather than the other way around and yes i have already started to treat her like a friend again and nothing more
 
J

Joe Stud

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 23, 2009
Messages
685
Reaction score
16
Location
Upstate NY
Benny, these guys are right... especially the warrior (rep).

I know its hard... and humiliating. But it will be better for you, and you will later feel more pride.... if you tell her you dont want her to come with you. Bring someone else... even a buddy (wingman).

ps... if she was really an honorable person, she would politely back out anyway.

edit to post: as I posted this, your above post showed up, so i see you are stuck. so I guess you just treat her like a cousin, and enjoy your vacation. that includes gaming chicks.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

D

dj ben2

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 2, 2006
Messages
341
Reaction score
3
Location
sydney, australia
so i suppose no one thinks theres anyway of reigniting her interest so i suppose ill just have to give up that idea oh well ill still have heaps of fun
 
O

omega05

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 18, 2009
Messages
654
Reaction score
10
Location
chicago
you're still looking for some way to hopefully re-ignite her interest and we are telling you to leave her alone
 
V

vatoloco

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 5, 2010
Messages
1,408
Reaction score
65
dj ben2 said:
so i suppose no one thinks theres anyway of reigniting her interest
Click to expand...
Dude, you've been LJBF'd. You're out.
 
J

JustLurk

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 1, 2010
Messages
301
Reaction score
2
dj ben2 said:
so i suppose no one thinks theres anyway of reigniting her interest so i suppose ill just have to give up that idea oh well ill still have heaps of fun
Click to expand...
It's not impossible, but not likely.
Unless you actually want her as a friend I'd say go for it anyway and have it be either the friend**** ends or the relationship begins.

But you could keep her around as a girl 0 friend.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
Top