We often hear hype surrounding "naturals". These are men who are good with women without too much conscious effort. But what is really going on with them, and how can YOU become a natural? I'm going to demystify that for you.
Naturals are men who can relate to women in a normal way. They don't do anything special. This can be frustrating for some men who want to find out what it IS that they do. But the first thing to realize is that naturals never come from a place of having to ask this question. Why? Because they don't care about the outcome. It never occurs to them to be analytical and try to "problem solve" their way into a woman's pants. It just places too much darn importance on the issue to even consider it. Plus it goes against the carefree vibe and just having fun. So you would never see a natural posting on a seduction forum because seduction (a form of strategy to get girls) is irrelevant in his world. It's just not the place he is coming from at all.
There's a community of men who see naturals as a set of behaviour patterns to be picked apart and studied, in true reverse-engineering fashion. This may appeal to some but it contradicts the outcome independence that is responsible for that natural behavior in the first place. The result is that it doesn't work well. Yes, emulating certain personality traits you see in naturals CAN give you some success, but if those traits are not your own then the success won't last. It's not real. It's a form of manipulation. And this can result in an identity breakdown down the road. Furthermore, it is totally unnecessary. Naturals are attractive people because they are completely real. This leads me to the following very important piece of advice for anyone wishing to be a natural.
The ONLY thing about naturals anyone should be concerned about copying, is their ability to only be what their natural personality dictates. Some of them may be flirty, some might be more Don Juan'ish, some might be ****y and funny, and some might just be very low-key and chilled out. But essentially they are all unattached to the outcome, and their real personality is what you see.
You don't need to be flirty, or a Don Juan, or ****y and funny, or whatever. Unless any or some of these traits are naturally your own, stay away from them. It is supplication otherwise, even if it's just inside your head. Have a look at the following examples showing this fallacy. These are common headers you see in the seduction community:
- "How to be the bad boy women love"
- "The 10 worst mistakes to avoid with women"
- "How to be the best Lover she ever had"
- "How to be a PUA"
Now here are some common examples of community advice which may appear to be on the right path, but are only thinly veiled as such:
- "Go out and have fun and show that you're not needy.......(but upon taking a closer look).......do this to get girls"
Similarly,
- "Go out and have fun with your friends........to get girls"
- "Be indifferent.......to get girls"
Clearly, the seed of neediness is still present in the above examples.
Now, this is what the advice should be, through and through, with no ducking out before the finish line:
- "Go out and have fun and be non-needy.......and that's all that matters"
- "Go out and have fun with your friends........and that's all that matters"
- "Be indifferent.........and that's all that matters"
Now I want to point out that desires are real and there is no point in denying that, BUT, any desire you do have should be on a VERY low burn, something which may or may not happen and is inconsequential to your already healthy mindset of not wanting anything from anyone and just being social and being YOU.
This is much more powerful and REAL.
Look inside yourself and figure out who you really are, and BE that person, with no attachment to outcome. THAT is how you become a natural.
Naturals are men who can relate to women in a normal way. They don't do anything special. This can be frustrating for some men who want to find out what it IS that they do. But the first thing to realize is that naturals never come from a place of having to ask this question. Why? Because they don't care about the outcome. It never occurs to them to be analytical and try to "problem solve" their way into a woman's pants. It just places too much darn importance on the issue to even consider it. Plus it goes against the carefree vibe and just having fun. So you would never see a natural posting on a seduction forum because seduction (a form of strategy to get girls) is irrelevant in his world. It's just not the place he is coming from at all.
There's a community of men who see naturals as a set of behaviour patterns to be picked apart and studied, in true reverse-engineering fashion. This may appeal to some but it contradicts the outcome independence that is responsible for that natural behavior in the first place. The result is that it doesn't work well. Yes, emulating certain personality traits you see in naturals CAN give you some success, but if those traits are not your own then the success won't last. It's not real. It's a form of manipulation. And this can result in an identity breakdown down the road. Furthermore, it is totally unnecessary. Naturals are attractive people because they are completely real. This leads me to the following very important piece of advice for anyone wishing to be a natural.
The ONLY thing about naturals anyone should be concerned about copying, is their ability to only be what their natural personality dictates. Some of them may be flirty, some might be more Don Juan'ish, some might be ****y and funny, and some might just be very low-key and chilled out. But essentially they are all unattached to the outcome, and their real personality is what you see.
You don't need to be flirty, or a Don Juan, or ****y and funny, or whatever. Unless any or some of these traits are naturally your own, stay away from them. It is supplication otherwise, even if it's just inside your head. Have a look at the following examples showing this fallacy. These are common headers you see in the seduction community:
- "How to be the bad boy women love"
- "The 10 worst mistakes to avoid with women"
- "How to be the best Lover she ever had"
- "How to be a PUA"
Now here are some common examples of community advice which may appear to be on the right path, but are only thinly veiled as such:
- "Go out and have fun and show that you're not needy.......(but upon taking a closer look).......do this to get girls"
Similarly,
- "Go out and have fun with your friends........to get girls"
- "Be indifferent.......to get girls"
Clearly, the seed of neediness is still present in the above examples.
Now, this is what the advice should be, through and through, with no ducking out before the finish line:
- "Go out and have fun and be non-needy.......and that's all that matters"
- "Go out and have fun with your friends........and that's all that matters"
- "Be indifferent.........and that's all that matters"
Now I want to point out that desires are real and there is no point in denying that, BUT, any desire you do have should be on a VERY low burn, something which may or may not happen and is inconsequential to your already healthy mindset of not wanting anything from anyone and just being social and being YOU.
This is much more powerful and REAL.
Look inside yourself and figure out who you really are, and BE that person, with no attachment to outcome. THAT is how you become a natural.
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