Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Narcissism

STR8UP

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Oh yea, I'm in the same boat.

My biggest problem is the deeply imbedded idea that for some reason everyone around me gives two sh!ts about what i say and do. If I could get over this I could go much farther, much faster.
 

A1SteakSauce

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I am definitely NPD. It has kind of worked for me, though, b/c if you get ppl to buy into your image they will promote you. Like, you act like you are rich and then they will pay you more, but if they thought you were poor they wouldn't hire you in the first place. Etc.

Actually, one good thing is to find ppl better at stuff than you and hang with them. It bruises the ego but keeps reality in check. Shaq doesn't need shoe lifts, but he does need Kobe. The other thing is, call yourself on your fantasies. You think you are a steet fighter? Try 60 seconds in a boxing ring, and then you'll remember what a wuss bag you really are. I believe NPD thrives in a lack of exposure to reality. Just like AFC fantasies.

A1
 

Demon

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Originally posted by Starman
Yea..it is a misnomer..Narcissus was a greek mythology character who fell in love with his own image and died..but true narcissists only wish EVERYONE loved them and admired them as much as they think they do.
Even that's partly incorrect.

Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy: Egoism

If you can understand Stanford's articles on Egoism, you'll have a better understanding of me and others around you. Some aren't true Egoists, but I am.
 

IntermediateDonJuaner

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This is not a flame post so please don't take it personally

Still remember the post written by Pook called "Killed that desperation"?

What did Pook say? He said "In order to get rid of your desperation, you need to believe and act like a great catch. In this way, you will not be desperate anymore and start seeing yourself as a prize instead of the girl as a trophy."

Isn't this called as narcissim? To be more specific, if you refer to the DSM-IV, there is a theory called "Loss of reality testing". In simple terms, it's called "insanity".

For example, a 25 year old man believed he is jesus so he started standing against the wall and spread his arms across as if he's on the cross. He resists all attempts to end his cruxification as he believes he is here to die in order to help the people on the earth.

Another example, a 43 year old man believes that he is Napoleon. So when he walks, he acts as if he's the most important person on earth and that everyone must respects him.

It shows clearly that the above cases are cases of people who are seriously mentally ill. If you're going to act like a great catch, then you're a candidate for the psychiatric ward . God bless you!

P/S : Remember I am not flaming any of you here. Because your problems deal with narcissim not "loss of reality testing" but they certainly do relate to each other a bit. I just want to point them out to make everyone aware of it.
 

legolas

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Originally posted by Starman
Legalos, Im way smarter, faster, better looking and more anatomically gifted than you are. SO dont feel bad :(
Oh yeah, you're way too friggin Naricssistic :D Hahahahah

Let's dub this the DJNPD Forum :D
 

Matt Rogers

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Yup, we should form the Narcissists Anonymous!

IDJ. I think you are right in saying that Pook's advice on being a great Catch is dangerous for people with Narcissic tendencies. Our problem is we have created a false self, a superior self, to hide and cover our insecurities. We seek others as a method to validate this false self. The solution is to see ourselves as we are, as imperfect humans, and recognise we have room for improvement. We need to get outside ourselves and take more of an interest in others.
 

Starman

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Demon..Your Egoism is a philosophy on the motives of human self sacrifice and altruism. Its a theoretical model. Narcissism is a clinical disorder.

IDJ - Pook said "You are the great Catch!" That isnt narcissim. Narcissism is when you think "I am the greatest catch EVER, I dont care about anyone one else, only to get the things I want in life, no matter how much I have to lie , manipulate, step over people, or do things ,morally wrong to Get there!"

Pook wrote that in Hopes of making the reader boost their self image and self confidence..Yes, you are the great Catch, but are you the GREATEST catch?? Should you be competing with others? NO!

The premise of pooks statement is to believe in yourself regardless of how many others are out there.
 

Aurelio Tiziano

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.....

This thread is very original.

I am staring to think I have some form of narcissism.


I was wondering if anything of what I do is for myself or just to impress someone.

I was going to buy a car some time ago, a sports car, and I had an image of myself cruising by university and everyone staring in awe.

When I lerant that the parking near university is actually very far, and hence very few college people would see me cruising, I suddenly was mcuh less interested.

I know it sounds crazy, even to me, but that's how it is.
Even when I go to the gym, I realising I actually find it hard to work out and quite tiring, but the idea of me with a strong muscular body that attracts chicks gives me the strength to endure.

I think it is a great limitation to one's self develpment. If you can enjoy things only because you know someone is watching you or envying you, then it is difficult to reach personal enlightenment



Cheers ;)
 

Pook

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This Narcissism stuff is bunk.

The problem (if anyone) has is not narcissim but chick thinking. When you go around desiring attention, extravegent praise, attempting to impress everyone, wanting to be the center of the world, getting muscles so everyone will look at you, and so on, is you acting like a girl.

Before you came to this site, you probably didn't think in the sexuality realm as you do now. You will take notice of your appearance more, how others react to you (in real world, it is called 'being observant', only in the world of psychology is it condemned as 'narcissism'), living out your imaginations rather than tossing them aside for dull reality, interested and focused on their feelings than others (rather than being a nice Guy sponge to soak up others' emotional blood), and seek and desire personal achievements.

If you took the OPPOSITE of these traits, you get something that doesn't resemble a Human.

Guys who enter this 'sexuality' zone often start off acting like a chick (because sexuality is the woman's turf). Look at you guys! You are letting an internet test define what you are! Shall we go through some chick magazines with more tests to define your other traits? Gee, if you are narsisstic, perhaps you have other 'plagues' as well. Let us take all the tests and find out.

The problem is not narcissim. The problem is chick-thinking. You are in absorption mode now, not action mode. It is a phase. Everyone goes through it. I did. Even those jocks who got all the chicks in high school did (they wanted to get the touchdown and be the 'star' in school).

Psychology is not the endless fountain of wisdom of human action that it pretends to be. I've found it had no answers for the mysteries of sexuality. Lots of theories, yes. Lots of psycho-babble, yes. But why DO chicks go for the jerks? Why did those chicks go for that BUM there but not the 'alpha-male' of finance over there? What are the answers to the poets? (poetry of course rides on the wave of sexuality) If psychology is a correcting mechanism, why are there more and more 'broken' people emerging? Why has all matters of sexuality entered a total meltdown these recent years and points to an increased decadence? And why is it that a single play of Shakespeare contains more truths on human action than an entire library of psychology?

The point is that psychology is very limited and stuffed with a lot of babble. It is nonsense on stilts. Psychology, with all its disorders and theories, only wants to shine like a finely cut stone; it rarely illuminates anything.

Remember guys, don't let ANYTHING steal your joy. Not even an Internet Test.
 

Starman

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Pook, have you been doing beer bongs through a colostomy bag again??

"If psychology is a correcting mechanism, why are there more and more 'broken' people emerging?"

ummm perhaps, since men are exiting the "macho" phase and beginning to open up and discover themselves without putting forth a psuedo "Im Tough, nothing penetrates me" shield..yet feeling like Sh1t the end of the day?

chick thinking. That is just ridiculous.

I never knew learning about oneself is considered "chick thinking"

If this is the real POOK, your words are being discreditied more and more as you spew nonsense about something that makes reletively no sense to you


and demon..I read your egoism article..you just dont seem to get it..
 

Starman

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whatever dude,

nice trying to explain a behavioral model..with a theoritcal one..I'll bet you havent even read the article you posted yourself

I dont need a dictionary, I have the DSM 4 sitting rigt here on my desk
 

cestmoi

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I've had most success in discovering and solving most of the problems in myself (including narcissm) thru two resources: emode.com and queendom.com.

Queendom: Its filled with great psychology tests. After doing all their free tests I decided to take on a 1 month = $14 subscription with which you have unlimited privileges to every singles test.

In the 30 days period I did every single test they have (over a 100 extensive tests). Some of these can take upwards of an hour to complete. They're quite detailed. After first month I cancelled and saved all results for reviewing later.

What you get after the test is a great extensive analysis.

PROs: Covers every possible aspect of your character
CONs: Almost no solutions on what to do to improve or solve the problem. Hasn't been updated in years !!!

Conclusion: Great for discovering everything you wanted about yourself. Basically you get for 14$ so many analyses it would take thousands of $ on a therapist.

emode.com: Similiar to queendom, but with alot less psychological tests. It mostly has "for fun quizzes" like " the which rock star you're most alike test". Just ignore those and do the PHd Certified tests.

You can do every test absolutely free. But you only get limited results. If you do get 1 month membership trial (5$) you can do all the tests then cancel. You'll get really extensive analysis and reccomendations which when printed come about to around 15 pages. They're like mini books on the subject and I must admit I've improved some parts of me thanks to these analysis. I definetely boosted my confidence with the personalized tips from my personal confidence report.

PROs: Free for just the results, Regulary updated and very well designed.
CONs: After the trial unless cancelled it will automatically rebill at 10$ a month and their site is built in such a way that they send you additional info every 2-3 weeks as well as update and create new tests every 4-5 weeks. This obviosly means they want you to renew each month.
 

cestmoi

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I agree with most of what you said Pook except for the psychology part.

I am studying social psychology as something related to what I study at college. And would it surprise you if I tould you that psychology says the exact same things most of the DJ bible says?

The Nice-guy syndrom and one-itis are all registered in social psychology and ethnology. Gold diggers? Yep. Extreme masculinity as the source of sucess in the dating game?-whole buncha studies on this.

Perhaps you've got popular women's quasi-psychology (Oprah, Cosmopolitan) mixed up with academic psychology. Its funny you should be saying psychology is the false answe, when it has infact been giving the same answers you have.
 

Demon

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Originally posted by Starman
whatever dude,

nice trying to explain a behavioral model..with a theoritcal one..I'll bet you havent even read the article you posted yourself

I dont need a dictionary, I have the DSM 4 sitting rigt here on my desk
You obviously do need a dictionary since you don't know what narcissism means.

Nice trying to explain fact with your psychiatry crap.
 

cestmoi

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Originally posted by Demon
Nice trying to explain fact with your psychiatry crap.
It's psychology, not psychiatry. Can't ya tell the difference? (edit:) without a dictionary?
 

Starman

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Demon are you breathing through a sh1t cannister ?

Where do you think Websters gets its definition of narcissism from?

I think I know where my belief in a definition goes..either to a dictionary..or a manual that is backed up by 300+ psychiatrists

you are more like a retard than an egoist
 

icepick

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Starman, no offense, but you are the perfect example of why colleges require (or should require) off-topic "elective" type courses like literature and philosophy. It seems as if you studied psychology (or some other form of social science, maybe even a hard science.)

Unless you are not giving much thought to what you post here, it also seems apparent that you have not taken any philosophy classes. It seems to me that you are one of those (and there are MANY) people that subscribe to the infallability of science.

Not to be mean, but you should do yourself a favor. Pick up some books on philosophy, or take some classes at a local college. Hell, even some literature or non-western history might be able to help you out.

Science is not the alpha and omega that our society portrays it as. Just because the so-called "Scientific Method" is used does not mean that truth is the product of any experiment or study.

There are many other perspectives out there, each one IS as valid as the next. (As much as science trys to claim otherwise, but there are many things that science is at a loss to explain.)

Actual truth lies in the mind of man. Don't close yourself off from other ways of thinking, you are doing yourself a disservice.
 

Starman

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Ice Spic,

Philosophy is the brother related discourse of psychology.

What makes you think I havent studied Philosophy?

Nietchze, Hume, Kant, Aquinas, Plato, Soc, Kant, Descartes, Ive studied them all..

Im just saying reading about philosophy to cure Obsessive thinking or Depression is more a distraction than actual self help.

Jeez, how did you gather I had no insight into philosophy from my posts? You're a real socratic arent you?
 
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