"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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My X is killing me...

Bratt2230

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Seriously, my ex-girlfriend is killing me..

after a serious, and VERY NICE relationship, we broke up and she has now found a new BF.

To make this post short.. any tips on how i can possibly get her back, while she is having a BF?

- and well, i cannot BS her, since she has known me for 2 years, and she can see right trough me, which is the reason i actually want to get back together.

any old post/articles about this topic?? ..

regards

.. Answer to Question 1;

It is actually "complicated". age both 18. - today just about 4 months ago, but read this;


- what happened, after 2 weeks of arguments, she decides to brake up, and i was like "ok(didn't care)" which made her go NUTS, 2-3 days later, i start dating this other girl, which apparently changed my X's from Angry, to completly heartbroken (IM NOT A JERK, IT JUST SOUNDS LIKE IT) afterwards, i changed between this new girl and my ex 2-3 times (and the last time me and my X had sex, was a 3-4 weeks ago).

What happens, she starts dating this new guy (from her class, about 1 month ago) - THIS IS NOT A REBOUND RELATIONSHIP, I AM 90% SURE - and is now together with him 24/7, f*cking and kissing him and kind'a Ignoring me, which is killing me...


- why do i want to get her back?
Because she was AMAZING in Bed, our personalities MATCH and because she is a HB10 (i still do not know how i managed to get her, no BS, she is 10)


so now, i guess out of pure jelousy, i want her back.


SORRY FOR THE BAD ENGLISH!


Edit; i forgot to mention an important fact.. the reason i am so frustrated is, the guy she is dating, and Fvcking, is a guy she KNOWS i disliked very much, in fact i hate him :) ...
 
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"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Tiguere

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How long since brake up? How dumped who? Age of both?
 

scorpio1138

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don't make any attempts to call or text her.

leave it up to her.

it's going to be painful for you for awhile, there's no getting around that.

but there's a good possibility that she will be very curious why you suddenly stopped contacting her.

She might even decide after awhile that this new guy is not for her and go back to you.

don't apologize to her or be sorry or admit to anything. Be a MAN! Be Strong!
 

Bratt2230

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scorpio1138 said:
don't make any attempts to call or text her.

leave it up to her.

it's going to be painful for you for awhile, there's no getting around that.

but there's a good possibility that she will be very curious why you suddenly stopped contacting her.

She might even decide after awhile that this new guy is not for her and go back to you.

don't apologize to her or be sorry or admit to anything. Be a MAN! Be Strong!
Actually, i kinda did the opposite to START with, because of my damn lack of selfcontrole when it comes to this girl.. it is only this girl /My X\ who can make me act like a freaking moron...

but what i wanted to say is, that from this day, today, i am NOT going to take contact with her for about a month, and then come back as a friend, and try to.. well.. convert her mind, if she is still not interested.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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5string

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Let me get this straight. You want her back because:

1)She's gorgeous
2)Great in bed
3)You are jealous

So the F what? Get over it. Even after you know she's been banging that other guy you still want her? Lame.

Sounds like desperation to me.

Gonna be a little hard on you here but you need to hear it.

Unfvck yourself right now, and go find another gorgeous girl who's good in bed. That will fix your problem. Let me ask you this. If you were eating a cheesburger, got up from the table and came back to finish it and found out some other guy had taken a several bites of it in your absence, would you finish eating the cheesburger?
 

Bratt2230

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5string.

I must ask you one question - even so i know exactly what you are trying to say, and i appreciate your answer!! - BUT, it sounds like you are telling me only to **** virgins (-: ..

But yeah... this is PURE desperation, combined with DEPPRESION, because i back then, really felt this special connection, and like she was SPECIAL ... But when thinking about her, fvcking that other guy, seriously... that is screwing with my mind... FRUSTRATION is the word i am looking for :)
 

Nkognito

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Yea this is going to be hard man but you're going to have to give up on her. Even though you think this is not a rebound she is still with this guy and ANY involvement in trying to sabotage the relationship will make you look worse and here is why.

Everytime you think you're being covert and plotting her new boyfriends demise, she is actually comparing you to him. You'll come off as needy, clingy and it will reinforce her decision to no longer be with you. What you need to do is blow it off, be the better man. If you to run into each other and he is with her, shake his hand, introduce yourself, lean over and tell him "watch out she bites". Be happy, keep the convo short and cut it off bounce out of there.

Ex's always come back, she will once she finds out the new guy is not like you. Keep you patience but focus on yourself and don't worry you're 18 man! you are going to go through a lot more of this in the next 15 years so get used to it.
 

Bratt2230

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NKOGNITO:

Thanks man, actually, that was what i need'd to hear.. Boostet my mood, and i guess you are right, i should forget her, move on, and well.. "be the better man" ;)
 

5string

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Petari said:
5string.

I must ask you one question - even so i know exactly what you are trying to say, and i appreciate your answer!! - BUT, it sounds like you are telling me only to **** virgins (-: ..

But yeah... this is PURE desperation, combined with DEPPRESION, because i back then, really felt this special connection, and like she was SPECIAL ... But when thinking about her, fvcking that other guy, seriously... that is screwing with my mind... FRUSTRATION is the word i am looking for :)
I'm not telling you to just F virgins. You have oenitis my friend. As I said, she's moved on and banging somebody else and the thought of it is rattling around in your head. You are minfvcking yourself by your own design because of your desperation!

Desperation can ruin a man. Move on. You'll be just fine after you get your next girl.

Now get out there and find her.
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

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Bratt2230

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5string said:
I'm not telling you to just F virgins. You have oenitis my friend. As I said, she's moved on and banging somebody else and the thought of it is rattling around in your head. You are minfvcking yourself by your own design because of your desperation!

Desperation can ruin a man. Move on. You'll be just fine after you get your next girl.

Now get out there and find her.
I will try to do so! thanks!
 

5string

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Petari said:
I will try to do so! thanks!
There ya go! Trust me, you find a new girl and start having fun with her, your problem will be solved.

And if your old girl tries to contact you, don't go there. :nono:
 

Bratt2230

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5string said:
There ya go! Trust me, you find a new girl and start having fun with her, your problem will be solved.

And if your old girl tries to contact you, don't go there. :nono:
i wanted to ask you this..

The next TXT messege i get from her, should i IGNORE it, or how?
 

Nkognito

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5string said:
And if your old girl tries to contact you, don't go there. :nono:

^ Quoted for truth, remember Petari, you're the prize, she needs to chase you. :up:
 

loveshogun

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Petari said:
age both 18
Let me tell you something about being 18, from one of my stories:

Kid, don’t you know why there’s so many love songs
out there? Isn’t it obvious? Well, then I’ll tell you why.
Your situation is not unique. Your feelings are not special.
Everything you’re going through right now is something
that someone, somewhere has felt. And ninety-nine out of
a hundred of them, like you, think it’s special. That it can’t
die. Get over it, or life will pass you by just like it does
them.
There are billions of people on this planet. By 18, every one of them has gone through what you've gone through - the smart ones, over time, learn to take it as a learning experience.

It's a whole wide world out there. At the age of 18, you have much bigger things to worry about (like getting your priorities straight so you're not a f*ck up at the age of 22) - the only problem is that no 18 year old in the world knows that instinctively.

This is the difference between a boy and a man - knowing what cards need to be held, and what cards need to be folded for new ones.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Bratt2230

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Nkognito said:
^ Quoted for truth, remember Petari, you're the prize, she needs to chase you. :up:
just to ask again ;b


The next TXT messege i get from her, should i IGNORE it, or how?:rolleyes:


LOveshogun;


It is just my first time to actually be "heartbroken", but well, just like with AA, you just have to get rejected to DONT CARE, so i guess i have to get heartbroken once, to learn about it, and never be it again.
 

5string

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Petari said:
i wanted to ask you this..

The next TXT messege i get from her, should i IGNORE it, or how?
How? Easy, just don't answer. It will be tempting, but don't.

It will drive her crazy, but so what? You are a good guy right? She had her chance with you and fvcked it up.

And when you go out there and find a new girl, why not find a few more? Have fun whilst you're young.
 

saab1981

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dude, just totally cut all contact from her, do as much as you can to be around other women, see if you can get some interest going.
 

Nkognito

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Petari said:
just to ask again ;b


The next TXT messege i get from her, should i IGNORE it, or how?:rolleyes:
Yea as with 5String, just blow her off because texting is just a ego check to make sure you're not on suicide watch. Think of your worth, and that is you're worth calling. So if she calls, kick it to voicemail, give it a day and call her back. It will most likely go to voicemail so keep it short with a simple "Hi (name),Looks like I missed your call. I'll check my voicemail when I get a chance. Call me if it's important, take care".

If the girl wants to be with you, she would not be with him. If you let this affect you and she see's it, just an ounce of it then she will drag you through the mud. Right now you have your whole life ahead of you .
 

Bratt2230

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.

Its funny, all i need'd was a few arguments, and i am convinced...

Yeah, as you guys says.. If she REALLY wanted to be with me.. i guess if she loved me. she would Be with me, or atleast show it, and i have found other good arugments for why i MUST leave her alone.

Thanks Guys ;)!

I alredy like this forum bettter than the others, here you atleast get an answer within a day. :D
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

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