"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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My stupid problem

trippychip

Don Juan
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Alright well last night i went to this all ages club thing so i can get ready for the real deal in 2 months. A bunch of diff hot girls approached me, and it went great. I mean i made em laugh and teased em and i dunno whether they were drunk or what not but they were goin crazy with the kino. So after all this great success i still couldnt seem to approach a chick on my own. Its such a pain in the ass, i don't understand it. What the hell should i do?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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JoeyCalves82

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It's definitely not easy at first, dude...For some people the fear of approaching never goes away entirely, but anyone can learn to reduce it dramatically...I suggest you get as much exposure to clubs/bars - even malls or schools - wherever there are girls that you might like to meet...Just being there, especially if you're conveniently "in the way," (like standing near the entrance so girls will have to brush against you to pass), will help you...

Just put yourself in these environments, and after 50-100 girls have initiated conversations with you, or have at least given you some clue of permission (like eye contact with smiling, or an apology for brushing against you), you'll go in for the kill - and even if your anxiety never totally goes away, it will literally get easier to approach with every girl...Good luck.
 

TizZle

Senior Don Juan
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Sounds like a confidence problem. Start small just by saying hi to the hotties. Once you get past that I'd suggest either striking up a convo with some hotties or approaching some girls at work. Ever to go "hooters" during the day ? they aren't real busy and the girls are hot. Usually they are just sitting around when they have nothing to do.
 

PRMoon

Master Don Juan
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If you don't believe in your abilities no one else will. Nerve is something everyone has but if you don't use it, it'll never do you any good. What do you have to be afraid of? I mean it's not like you're about to double tap somebody, you're just going over to meet them. Interaction is no big deal, don't think about it, don't worry about conciquences. You have a responsibility to yourself, so just go in and get down to buisness.
 

TizZle

Senior Don Juan
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They are a person just like you.
They have feelings just like you.
Most women rely on feelings more than you.
You are using the logic that women want to be approached( which that is true)
Women want to be wanted by men.
Men want women.


I don't see the conflict here besides the fact that this guy isn't too confident in his abilities. Just approach and have fun. It isn't the end of the world if a woman rejects you. You'll get better. Just build some rapport and guage interest level on that and what actions you are taking. AKA KINO. alright?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

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