"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

My shink's hamster

gov87

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 4, 2014
Messages
83
Reaction score
2
I'm not sure whether BB is a troll or not but I will say this for him if he's being honest and for others who may be reading...

I understand many our against "shrinks", but please don't let these opinions keep you away from one if you think you could benefit. I really don't like the stigma attached.

As far as the shrink you seeing BB with a woman who is obviously trying to manipulate you, find a new one. You should already have a nagging inside you which is your instincts... follow it.

So, where does my opinion/advice come from on this- my experience. I started seeing a guy around a year ago and it has been tremendous, I cannot deny it. I only go maybe once a month now but I make sure to go in ever now and then to keep on track til I'm really comfortable. You have to make sure you're seeing someone you can trust tho... I cannot stress this enough. I suggest seeing a male, obviously bc they will be able to relate better.

I understand where some people see talking to a therapist as a bad thing, but you all need to understand that everyone's experience is different and that other's map to a healthier life will require different approaches. For me, I needed someone to validate my thoughts/feelings and also help me start to be able to realize where my patterns came from. Knowing that there were reasons for why I thought that way and being able to confirm this with a safe person, has helped me get to where I am becoming better and better at self-validation... which leads to confidence and all other sorts of traits that are masculine that we possess naturally. Unfortunately, the world today has several potential roadblocks that can inhibit us from embracing them.

Along with reading forums like this and other good information, I feel like I'm actually taking control of my life whereas other times I thought I was but I was actually being led by the ways of a dillusioned society.

Again, I have no hate for people against therapy but please don't discourage anyone that might benefit from a little.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Peaks&Valleys

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 11, 2013
Messages
1,956
Reaction score
355
I honestly don't get how she's trying to manipulate him.

backbreaker said:
been going to this woman for 3 years we have a pretty good report and we shoot the **** sometimes
backbreaker said:
We got on the subject of men and women or what not and she was telling me that men think they know what women want but they don't, beucase well my boyfriend has a pot belly and he's so confident.
So she's saying that men think it's about their looks, but instead she says women are attracted to a man's confidence and what not.

I think that's good advice.
 

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
16,793
Reaction score
10,019
gov87 said:
I understand many our against "shrinks", but please don't let these opinions keep you away from one if you think you could benefit
That's the thing, I can't imagine a situation where I could benefit from talking to a shrink. That doesn't mean no one else would, but it's not for me.

Peaks&Valleys said:
So she's saying that men think it's about their looks, but instead she says women are attracted to a man's confidence and what not.

I think that's good advice.
You could get the same observation from Reader's Digest. I've been hearing that same statement my entire life, going back to 50 years ago.

A man should have confidence, yes. But beyond that, I think the whole thing gets a little silly. Let's say I have $80 worth of confidence. But oh wait, here comes another guy, look, he has $120 worth of confidence. The girls will like him better for sure. :rolleyes:
 

taiyuu_otoko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 10, 2008
Messages
5,773
Reaction score
4,875
Location
象外
zekko said:
You could get the same observation from Reader's Digest. I've been hearing that same statement my entire life, going back to 50 years ago.
The fundamental dynamics of male-female relationships ARE pretty simple. Guys like young women with good looks. Girls like established men with power.

EVERYTHING that is an indication (about youth or power) is going to cause attraction.

Luckily for men, there is really NO END to the amount of attraction you can create, so long as you continue to improve yourself.

However, because this NECESSARILY involves improving your social skills which NECESSARILY requires getting out and talking to girls A LOT, most guys would prefer to make it much more complicated, imagining there's some deeply mysterious red pill theory that takes complex brain power to understand.

Which keeps them safely on the sidelines debating all the endless facets of "game."
 

glass half full

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 2, 2012
Messages
894
Reaction score
285
Shrinks are different just like anyone else. I had taken my stepson to one in 2007 and I was impressed with him, he seemed to think like I did. He couldn't help my stepson, cause my sillyazz wife waited too late (he was 14) he needed to go when he was much younger.

When I needed to go, he was booked up for two months, so I saw the other one. He sucked, had a very expensive office though...

I called their home office and scheduled ahead for the good one, they wanted to now why, so I told them. Two months or so later, the guy went ape on my shrink and left all pizzed...

Like anything else, you need to shop for the "right fit".
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Top