"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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My RA situation

The Cooler King

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So I'm in college.
And I got this cute little RA from India.

I feel I have laid out c&f pretty nicely with her.

She has a boyfriend but I think hes back in india (I always go for the ones taken...its tough :( ).
Even with that tho she's still pretty flirty. I dont know if she knows what shes doing, her being from a different country. But she sat on my lap twice...that was so damn nice too.

She also did that to some other guys too....

For awhile now we been eating lunch together.
Lately tho we havent...a break if you will between us.

Yesterday we did. And she told me to meet her at 2:30. I got there at 2:32 and we crossed paths as she was walking arm in arm with I think another guy RA.

She points at as if you would a bad dog and said dont talk to me, you have to learn to be more on time.

And I'm like I'm two min late!
I said this while walking towards the dining hall.

She utters some words to the guy RA, and I heard the guy say he wants you.

I'm just like no, I want just want to eat, while still making my way to the dining hall.

She then breaks off with the guy and follows me.
"Why are you following me?"
"Oh, dont be so full of yourself"


The lunch went well, was scarstic with her.

She takes off her jacket and had a shirt on showing some of her chest (idk if this is a sign).

And said that she wanted to work out at 10 that night (funny how she knows I like to go at 10).

And I'm like cool...me too.

We decided to go but I never went...I instead got high on my belcony right before I was going to go.
hahhaahhaha

But then she IMs me while I was sleeping...she was asking if I was awake, and thats it.


I think these might all be signs of some sort.
Am I reading them right?

Any advice on what to do next?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Marlimus

Senior Don Juan
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with women who have boyfriends, play it cool, and just lean back. Be out of her reach. Why? Because a woman who has a BF might find you attractive, and therefore give buying signals, but if you try to cash in the chips, you get the cheek turn, in spite of whatever signals you got.

Also, the stuff you mentioned is fairly insubstantial. My advice is to start pulling away gradually. Call her less and less, make her believe you got somebody else. Confide a fake secret in her, and when she listens, thank her for being such a good friend.

From my experience, women with boyfriends are not worth it unless they meet you halfway, or initiate altogether. Only then will you know if she is serious.
 

The Cooler King

Don Juan
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Originally posted by Marlimus
with women who have boyfriends, play it cool, and just lean back. Be out of her reach. Why? Because a woman who has a BF might find you attractive, and therefore give buying signals, but if you try to cash in the chips, you get the cheek turn, in spite of whatever signals you got.

Also, the stuff you mentioned is fairly insubstantial. My advice is to start pulling away gradually. Call her less and less, make her believe you got somebody else. Confide a fake secret in her, and when she listens, thank her for being such a good friend.

From my experience, women with boyfriends are not worth it unless they meet you halfway, or initiate altogether. Only then will you know if she is serious.
Ya I rolled around with one that had a bf for 2 years.
Then right after that she went back with him and suddenly felt bad for cheating on him...she even is saying that its not cheating.

A few times my RA kept asking me if I met any girls. I just kept going of course, who do you think I am?


Can you explain the false secert bit? I'm a little confused.

And she always asks me how everything is going (its her job as an RA I guess). So next time I should thank her for it?
 

ShizamDaMan

Master Don Juan
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Let me tell you, as an RA it is generally frowned upon to date/fraternize with residents. Not that it stops anyone from doing it. If anything, I am more interested in nailing female residents just cause I'm not supposed to. Give a big middle finger to the man :)

Just keep working it like normal. Just cause she's your RA doesn't mean she isn't a normal girl. If she doesn't like her BF that much and you play your game right I don't see why you couldn't hook up with her.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Centaurion

Master Don Juan
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residential advisor
 
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