[--My questions for normal people w/ a social life, etc --]

[[R]eality]

I'll try to keep this short.

I have several questions, but they are only for people who have normal, healthy social lives and are older than 20. If you're a 25-yr-old-virgin, this is obviously not for you.

What should I make of these recurrences?

This often happens: I would see a woman in some random situation like on a street/beach and comment something to her or say something to her and she wouldn't react, but if I get her attention in a sort of "in your face" way, something like "hey" with a "hey, I'm talking to you and you ignored me" she would start talking cheerfully like "oh hi didn't hear you" etc.
Q: Most times, do you think that's what happens, or is it a conscious ignoring on their part?

This also often happens: I would talk to women, again often those met randomly somewhere, I'd comment and we'd start talking; they would keep up the conversation for about 5-10 minutes, pretty pleasant, etc, and then I'd want to be on my way so I offer to take this somewhere in the future, and almost always hear about their boyfriends. Telling them that it's okay or I'm okay with it doesn't change their attitudes.
Q: I assume they know why a man's talking to them. Why put up this 10-minute act all the time?

This happens, too: I understand that "natural flow" or "natural connection" is a man and a woman making eye contact, and she obviously shows interest like by keeping it or smiling or looking back or whatever. I make eye contact with a lot of women that I find attractive, and try to smile a bit, etc. They almost always turn away, without smiling, without looking back.
Q: Should I take that as a rejection? From so many women? Oh -- but if I do talk to them regardless, then read above to see what happens.

Finally: when women DO look at me alot, although they don't smile, is when I drive. I drive a truck.
Q: Why? Maybe I'm more relaxed when I drive? Maybe it's the truck?


Thank you all for helping me with this. I try not to overthink, but I see these tendencies so often I wonder if I maybe should address them.

 

[sexy_kuta]

I'll try to keep this short.
you are over thinking dude, relac and let it flow..
you have a whole life ahead why stop and think of something small? experiement try new things.. if u say hi to a girl and she didnt reply back.. go up to her and say it again(liked how u did that) trying things like is the only key.
I have several questions, but they are only for people who have normal, healthy social lives and are older than 20. If you're a 25-yr-old-virgin, this is obviously not for you.

What should I make of these recurrences?

This often happens: I would see a woman in some random situation like on a street/beach and comment something to her or say something to her and she wouldn't react, but if I get her attention in a sort of "in your face" way, something like "hey" with a "hey, I'm talking to you and you ignored me" she would start talking cheerfully like "oh hi didn't hear you" etc.
Q: Most times, do you think that's what happens, or is it a conscious ignoring on their part?baicly you are elimating the chances of her sayin no.. some guys would say hi and wouldnt get an answer back, they assume thats a no and would walk off.. but when you get up in there face and and basicly have the additude of " i aint accepting a nO" it shows you have balls. sometimes girls cant act in those kind of situations, their weakness is actions.. and you are embracing that by walking up them and call them out on the ignoring part. and to answer your question.. assume that she didnt hear you. ASSUME THAT< never think negative things always think postive.. assume she didnt hear u so by saying hey louder and get her attention is the best way.. if shes CLEARLY ignoring you like turns around then you have the right to call her out on it.. dont call a girl out on that in most cases becuase its the first approach and there could be many varibles on why she didnt she answer back, so i like said to summ it up. relax, say hi, if she didnt answer back, she must have no t heard you.. try talking louder and move incloser... if she acts like a ho then u have the right to walk away and move 2 feet over and talk to that hot blonde!

This also often happens: I would talk to women, again often those met randomly somewhere, I'd comment and we'd start talking; they would keep up the conversation for about 5-10 minutes, pretty pleasant, etc, and then I'd want to be on my way so I offer to take this somewhere in the future, and almost always hear about their boyfriends. Telling them that it's okay or I'm okay with it doesn't change their attitudes.
Q: I assume they know why a man's talking to them. Why put up this 10-minute act all the time?thier playing hard to get, like i said.. actions is their weak spot..

her: i have a bf
youh really? whens the wedding date with a smile on your face
her: haha we're not gettin married silly
me: (look shocked) ohh really? then it cant be too serious, let me get your number and we can get together"

by saying that u are elimating the chances of her saying NO, its all about experiementing and it looks like u are in the right direction.. keep it up!

This happens, too: I understand that "natural flow" or "natural connection" is a man and a woman making eye contact, and she obviously shows interest like by keeping it or smiling or looking back or whatever. I make eye contact with a lot of women that I find attractive, and try to smile a bit, etc. They almost always turn away, without smiling, without looking back.
Q: Should I take that as a rejection? From so many women? Oh -- but if I do talk to them regardless, then read above to see what happens.no, not a rejection.. the only rejection you find is a "no" and how would u find out? you walk up to her and be like "hi my name is TROJAN MAN, always go for the whole 9 yards not the first yard.. so what she doesnt smile... i like that other thread about a guy ranting about ppl asking "does she like me!" remember that thread? a fellow dj member made a rant about guys asking silly questions. one in particalur, "does she like me" theres NO way of finding out unless you phsyically find out, and thats ASking her out, she can either say yes or no. and u would find ur answer that easy.. same as this situation bro, if a girl makes an eye contact, shes either interested in u or just looking around to get anttention, and how wuld u find out? by walking over to her and ask her

Finally: when women DO look at me alot, although they don't smile, is when I drive. I drive a truck.
Q: Why? Maybe I'm more relaxed when I drive? Maybe it's the truck?
could be many varibles.. you never know.. maybe the truck makes you look more of a man? girls dig men you know.. not boys in civics.. many women could be checking you out.. i tend to find a rule that if a girl looks at u more than 3 times.. then u are an idiot for making her look 3 times.. you should make a move by the second time she looks at you..


Thank you all for helping me with this. I try not to overthink, but I see these tendencies so often I wonder if I maybe should address them.

and last. you ARe overthinking, RElax dude, relax, dont rush things, take your time and work things out. if they dont work out try different approaches.. u can try anything but make sure you are at leasting Trying something, never sit around and do nothing. always explore LIfe, because you only have one chance to do it

d

 

[Delta]

good questions.

i encounter the same things (almost to a T) myself. for me, it's getting to the point where i think cold approaches simply don't work for me or djs are perpetuating a myth or they're all in europe.

delta

 

[chili kat]

This often happens: I would see a woman in some random situation like on a street/beach and comment something to her or say something to her and she wouldn't react, but if I get her attention in a sort of "in your face" way, something like "hey" with a "hey, I'm talking to you and you ignored me" she would start talking cheerfully like "oh hi didn't hear you" etc.
Q: Most times, do you think that's what happens, or is it a conscious ignoring on their part?

Basically, it sounds to me like they just don't see you coming. They may be aware that you're there and they probibly hear you, they just don't realize you're talking to them. If you don't have their eyes before you speak, they'll just assume you're talking to another girl or your buddy. People overhear conversations all of the time.

This also often happens: I would talk to women, again often those met randomly somewhere, I'd comment and we'd start talking; they would keep up the conversation for about 5-10 minutes, pretty pleasant, etc, and then I'd want to be on my way so I offer to take this somewhere in the future, and almost always hear about their boyfriends. Telling them that it's okay or I'm okay with it doesn't change their attitudes.
Q: I assume they know why a man's talking to them. Why put up this 10-minute act all the time?

Again, they may not see that coming. Good looking women end up talking to total strangers a lot because people are friendly to them for everywhere they go. I mean, that day you talked to her she probibly had a nice/pleasant conversation with a cab driver too. Most times they don't mind because a little chit chat with a smile goes a long way for them. Find yourself a good looking girl and I'll gaurentee she knows a place where she can get some free sh1t, even if it's just some pimple-faced kid selling hotdogs in the park. These women don't get connected by being anti-social. So, just because she is being friendly and paying attention doesn't mean squat when it comes to sexual attraction unless there are other visual indicators to back that up.

This happens, too: I understand that "natural flow" or "natural connection" is a man and a woman making eye contact, and she obviously shows interest like by keeping it or smiling or looking back or whatever. I make eye contact with a lot of women that I find attractive, and try to smile a bit, etc. They almost always turn away, without smiling, without looking back.
Q: Should I take that as a rejection? From so many women? Oh -- but if I do talk to them regardless, then read above to see what happens.

You'd be amazed at how insecure some women really are, especially the very attractive ones. Sometimes a smile/grin from accross the room could insinuate you're making fun of her. Like you and your buddies are joking about her or something along those lines.

Keep first eye contact to just that. Save the smile for when you are approaching her.

Finally: when women DO look at me alot, although they don't smile, is when I drive. I drive a truck.
Q: Why? Maybe I'm more relaxed when I drive? Maybe it's the truck?

Who knows. Could mean anything. They could be checking it out because it's a nice truck. They could be checking it out because it's the biggest piece of sh1t they've ever seen. They could be looking because it has a distinct sound and people naturally just look. Whatever. Unless they show an obvious interest, it means nothing at all good or bad.

 

[skip2mylou781]

if you really want my HONEST opinion, id say it all comes down to one thing:

LOOKS

i have no idea how you look, but as a general fact, lets use a scale of 1 to 10 (1 worst, 10 best):

if a guy who is a 7 approaches a girl who is a 9, most likely he will get what happens to u - ignored initially, the bf line, ect ect, simply cuz the girl DOES NOT CARE TO KNOW that guy, but is scared to tell him to fvck off cuz she doesnt know how much of a creep he could be


on the other hand, lets say a guy who is a 9 approaches a girl who is a 7 - i GUARANTEE YOU she will notice the compliment he gives her, she wont give him the bf excuse, ect ect..........because she simply will WANT to get to know him due to thinking hes hot.'

you follow?

 

[skip2mylou781]

oh and the worst looking a guy is and the better looking the girl is, the more negative reactions/ "i have a bf" lines u will hear

on the other side, if the guy is a 10 and the girl is a 5, and if hes crazy enough to hit on her, she will 99% of the time say she is single (even when she isnt!!!!).......unless she is in a serious serious relationship that truly truly makes her happy

 

[AlekNovi]

MAN Good job on managing to get 2 quality replies (out of 4), I guess "ask and it will be given" works

I would have written a reply (as someone who has experience), but chili kat, and sexy kuta have responded very well, and I agree on all counts, nothing to add.

Please do ignore the KJs and trolls about to come. They're attracted to ruining quality threads, like moths to a flame

 

[skip2mylou781]

its a well knwn fact that a beautiful hb9 girl does is not interested in having some 5/10 guy approach her and start trying to get to know her - what purpose does he initially serve her??? SHE serves him the purpose of being beautiful to him, but what is he offering???

 

[mrRuckus]

i think skip copies and pastes his answers.

 

[ChrizZ]

I know lots of guys that are a 4 or lower that approached HB9-10s and are now dating them.

IT DOESN`T COME DOWN TO LOOKS!

looks don´t matter if you have game and high status. Let´s say someone looked like Brad Pitt and someone looked like Danny Devito. If the guy that looked like Brad Pitt was totally boring and shy he wouldn´t get any *****. The Danny Devito guy however would get lots of ***** despite of his looks because he has an awsome personality. Looks only help you to get noticed a little faster by attractive women, but that´s all.

 

[AlekNovi]

I know lots of guys that are a 4 or lower that approached HB9-10s and are now dating them.

IT DOESN`T COME DOWN TO LOOKS!

looks don´t matter if you have game and high status. Let´s say someone looked like Brad Pitt and someone looked like Danny Devito. If the guy that looked like Brad Pitt was totally boring and shy he wouldn´t get any *****. The Danny Devito guy however would get lots of ***** despite of his looks because he has an awsome personality. Looks only help you to get noticed a little faster by attractive women, but that´s all.

We all know that man , you shouldn't waste energy trying to change the mind of a KJ or a troll. I'm a 5 btw (hot or not proves it over and over), and do almost exclusively cold-approaches.

 

[skip2mylou781]

you guys dont get it!

i usually see hot guys with hot girls, average looking guys with hot girls are rare, and YOUR definition of average might be some hot girl's definition of GOOD LOOKING (i know that my hb9.5 loves a guy with a hairy chest and a little fat (but with muscle too),which would be me, so even tho I am a 7 on average, to HER i was more like a 9)

also, an average guy who is dating a hot girl most likely did not meet her RANDOMLY thru an approach, but more likely met her thru work, friends, or some common interest

a hot girl will not randomly magically wanna bother getting to know an ugly guy

refer to my memorable 20 page thread about LOOKS if youd like lol


keep in mind, the MAJORITY of couples are close in the looks catergory IN EACH OTHER'S EYES

 

[[R]eality]

Regarding looks, this 5/10 stuff is moot as far as I'm concerned, because I've always heard compliments regarding my looks from all sorts of people and almost never a bad word from anyone. So I'm not Bill Gates @ 17 approaching..

Also, looks don't matter as we all know because we've all seen average guys with hot girls. And vice-versa. So they don't matter. I, personally, have had gorgeous women, and it wasn't because of status or money; I came from middle class and at that time was in college. Both women that I'm thinking of, who were both very very attractive, at least 9's, commented on looks, but pretty quickly it was about a normal human connection with the two. They reciprocated interested and I, encouraged by that, relaxed and was myself and we hit it off.

I want to replicate that. I wonder how.