"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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My progress

Dover

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I'm glad I found this site. It really helped me start turning things around in my life. Since last year Ive been excersizing a ****load.. I'm 5' 9" and Ive gone from 205lbs to 165. Also Ive been finally conquering my weakass social phobia. I used to be completely terrified of girls. I was afraid to touch them or talk to them or anything and i really envied people who could. On the rare occasion that I would get a girl I would totally scare her off by being super ultra clingy.

Now that Ive lost weight and started to look good Ive finally decided to just stop being a ***** and go out and talk to girls. Its been going great. Ive been reading up seriously with the DJ bible and trying to picture myself succesfully doing everything in it. It's working well too. For example, the other day I was with a girl I hardly knew who is hot. Usually I would have been terrified, but this time I felt much more in control. I was making her laugh and smile a ton. I touched her a lot, and she was touching me back. Also I ran into a girl I kind of know from school who I thought liked me. I decided to just hug her right off the bat before even talking to her. It seemed kind of odd to me, but she definitely liked it. We had a short convo then at the end as I was about to leave she hugged me!

Tonight was the most succesful yet. I was in a restaurant with a HB 8 and I was totally smooth, it was great because it felt totally natural. I was sitting next to her in the booth and we were getting some serious kino. She was loving it too, she kept touching me and whatnot. At one point i put some tic tacs in her mouth. This was freakin sweet. We were hugging a bunch too. When she had to leave, she asked for my number! That was a first!

I know this might seem kind of lame to all you hardcore DJ's out there, but this is seriously the most exciting thing to happen to me in a while. Thanks, sosuave.com.

I'll post in here in a while again with more progress!
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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chicksrock

Master Don Juan
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Good stuff ...keep it up...

your hardwork is inspirational to the rest of the community ;)
 

DJUofS

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Mar 10, 2004
Messages
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Originally posted by Dover
I'm glad I found this site. It really helped me start turning things around in my life. Since last year Ive been excersizing a ****load.. I'm 5' 9" and Ive gone from 205lbs to 165. Also Ive been finally conquering my weakass social phobia. I used to be completely terrified of girls. I was afraid to touch them or talk to them or anything and i really envied people who could. On the rare occasion that I would get a girl I would totally scare her off by being super ultra clingy.

Now that Ive lost weight and started to look good Ive finally decided to just stop being a ***** and go out and talk to girls. Its been going great. Ive been reading up seriously with the DJ bible and trying to picture myself succesfully doing everything in it. It's working well too. For example, the other day I was with a girl I hardly knew who is hot. Usually I would have been terrified, but this time I felt much more in control. I was making her laugh and smile a ton. I touched her a lot, and she was touching me back. Also I ran into a girl I kind of know from school who I thought liked me. I decided to just hug her right off the bat before even talking to her. It seemed kind of odd to me, but she definitely liked it. We had a short convo then at the end as I was about to leave she hugged me!

Tonight was the most succesful yet. I was in a restaurant with a HB 8 and I was totally smooth, it was great because it felt totally natural. I was sitting next to her in the booth and we were getting some serious kino. She was loving it too, she kept touching me and whatnot. At one point i put some tic tacs in her mouth. This was freakin sweet. We were hugging a bunch too. When she had to leave, she asked for my number! That was a first!

I know this might seem kind of lame to all you hardcore DJ's out there, but this is seriously the most exciting thing to happen to me in a while. Thanks, sosuave.com.

I'll post in here in a while again with more progress!
Congrats dude! Sounds like your story mirrors mine very closely. About a year ago, I was petrified of hot girls. I also was afraid of how I appeared which caused me to be scared to speak up in groups. Now I am usually the life of the party, or one of them. I touch girls all the time and am in much more control. Keep at it, it only gets better!
 

Dover

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2nd post time...

Since last post I had a date with the girl who asked for my number. It went ok. At first I spent a lot of time acting like a fool.. I was trying to make her laugh and keep her entertained all the time. She seemed to be losing interest. At some point though I turned it around and stopped acting like such a dumbass... I instead stopped talking so much and started listening and letting her talk. Using the 70/30 ratio thing. Things went much better from there. Too bad I didnt start like that. Well anyway, She came back to my loft and I gave her a massage and we started cuddling a bit. And that was about it, she had to be home by 12 so I had to bring her home, plus i had to get up at 6 the next day. As I dropped her off I kissed her on the cheek.

Then a couple days later she called me again, but i was out of state for the week so I wasnt able to get back to her. I think I'm gonna call her back now as a matter of fact....

Well thats all for now.. I'll check in again soon and hopefully I'll have more good news.
 

Dover

Don Juan
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Oh yeah, forgot to mention. About the massage part. She was just chillin up there sitting with me and I didnt think she was really into me, but i remembered that whole thing about make her say no. So I started massaging her and she really loosened up so to speak. We started cuddling and everything.. Probably would have gone further if she didnt have to be home.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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