"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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My one problem (help required)

loonyjuice

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I'll try to keep this brief.

I'm in my twenties and I've only had one LTR and a couple of short-lived gf's before. I've been to this site a few times before, and I've read a lot of stuff. It's starting to make sense and has made me realise how many opportunities I've missed in the past. I also realise that I'm more interesting to women than've ever believed.

However, I have one problem that I need help with, and fast (there's too much background to explain), but basically, I've met a girl (duh) and I don't want to mess this one up.

Can anyone explain to me clearly how I'm meant to go from friend to something more?

I need suggestions of how to set the mood and what lines you've sucessfully used before hand. I've seen the signs and know that I've a chance with her, but without some words of encouragement, reading articles on here that explain how to get to the kissing point but then stop short with words like go for it. I know i'm over thinking this, but I need some guidance.

I should explain that I see this girl regularly at a martial arts class, and that I don't want to make things awkward for either of us.

Please can someone explain how to setup a situation where I can test her or make it easier for me? I've already been on a few 'dates' that weren't dates, just hanging out and I'm looking to set up another probably thursday/friday, I'm keen to have something planned for then because I am aware that she may become bored or lose interest with my inability to make an opportunity.

I can explain more if needs be.

Thanks in advance.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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SickAgain

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Yeah Phat Rabbit is right. You're putting too much pressure on yourself. But I think the only to really get this chick is to get yourself out of the friend zone ASAP. I do not suggest saying sh!t like hey i like you or buying her flowers, but be more communicate through body language and actions. And be a bit more flirtatious in your conversation.
 

loonyjuice

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Thanks guys. I knew your responses would be as they are, and I'm aware of what you're saying. It's not quite like that, it's just that she is so different from a lot of women you meet - there's so much to explain! I've been trying to game a lot of different women, but they are all garbage in comparison.

She has men falling over themselves to be with her, and I now think I have a chance because I've been playing it cool and being light hearted. I'm not pinning my hopes on it, I'm just over-excited at the propect of a chance with her, but I'll be honest, I'm still pretty clueless with terms like flirt and romance. I guess I need to read more, but I'm kinda in a hurry to do something, and hopefully not stupid. I can always get to this point with a girl - like I said, I'm now aware of how many chances with hot women I've missed, and I'm only just starting to see how it all works, but I've had a lot of the painful rejections at this point as I'm inept at being quite so smooth with the kiss. For my one LTR I just jumped on her at some traffic lights, and it worked, but she told me that she wanted me to do something for ages before hand, and I can see it in this new girl now.

I have tried to do some kino, and she initiated it originally when I got her to come shopping with me to pick out some clothes and I'm looking to arrange this again, if possible. Although the cinema or a drive to the country are also posibilites that we done before.

The main problem is that if this was just some random girl in a club it would be a lot easier, but because she's familiar and I see her often, I'm looking to make it light hearted. I guess you're right I should try to flirt more - I always give good eye contact and I'm not afraid of her sh!t tests.

Wow didn't realise I'd written so much - I'd love to meet up with one of you guys and chat about this sort of stuff properly.

Thanks.
 

SickAgain

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Loony you strike me as a cool and humble dude, so I'm gonna give you honest advice. You're playing the nice guy role too strong. The bad news is if you keep doing it the way you are she's gonna lose interest eventually. The good news is you can still be a nice guy, but grow some balls and act on them. Show initiative. Surprise the girl. Be spontaneous. Even though you say this girl is special, you really don't know that. She might be a complete b!tch in disguise.

In any case, if I were in your position, I'd get her in a scenario where both of you have had a few drinks and are less inhibited and can act on your feelings more naturally, albeit probably a bit more sloppy. You can't be scared to f*ck this up. I actually enjoy trying new but stupid tactics on girls just for their reactions. But that's a difference story.

In conclusion, I honestly hate giving advice because everyone has different lives and situations from mine, but some things are constant and will always hold true, so I will end by saying all because a girl will spend time with you doesn't mean she's attracted to you. You have a "seduce" (for lack of a better term) to attract her. There are probably many old posts that could teach you that stuff.
 

Captain

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loonyjuice said:
I don't want to mess this one up.
It doesn't matter if you mess up, there are plenty of other women out there. Worrying about not messing up will hurt your game. Don't get attached to one women, the more you go after, the less each one will matter.

I don't want to make things awkward for either of us.
It will be more awkward when she puts you in the friendzone and you randomly asked her out 6 months later.

Make sure you kino escalate (touch her, and escalate the touching), don't act like an AFC, don't hide your sexuality, and make your move nice and early.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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