my hb9.5 Oneitis told me that she "needs time to think"

[skip2mylou781]

yup I was falling for her and then she dropped THAT bomb!

however, unlike DasaniWater, here is what happened:

Throughout telling me that she is confused and needs time to think (because of her stupid ex bf crying and trying to win her back), she threw in the lines that she really cares about me and doesnt want to lose me, bla bla bla, she wants to possibly be with me later

to which I said "you were awesome, we coulda been great, but I am moving on so dont expect another chance with me"

we'll see how that works out.......she seems to be missing me already, but **** i dont even know

 

[G_Nice_06]

man i've been in that boat many times

 

[skip2mylou781]

ive been in that boat many times too.......and every other time, i acted AFC'ish and told her i need her and want to be with her - none of those times worked

so this time, im doing 100% different thing, and i HATE playing this stupid game, because I actually DO want to be with her and only her

 

[Docs]

Throughout telling me that she is confused and needs time to think (because of her stupid ex bf crying and trying to win her back), she threw in the lines that she really cares about me and doesnt want to lose me, bla bla bla, she wants to possibly be with me later

I'm going to post this later, but I cracked a LJBF. She has weak trust in guys, so we started talking about past relationships and stuff, so I asked her how much she trusted me, and she said she did, so I told her to take my hand.
We talked for a bit and I shared to her some of my trust issues with girls cheating and all (or basically, bring me to her page).

And after that, I asked her to give us a shot, and she said this.
"Well...let me think about it.......yeah"

lol. I might be onto something.

 

[skip2mylou781]

so what are you saying about my current situation Docs?

 

[Nighthawk]

She's either playing hard to get or isn't sure. Either way, maintain high status by pulling away as you've done.

 

[skip2mylou781]

as i pulled back in that convo we were having, she threw in the line "I guess if you can easily move on, then you dont have strong enough feelings for me"

i HATE how shes trying to use her ****ing ******** bullshyt on me

 

[Docs]

"I guess if you can easily move on, then you dont have strong enough feelings for me"

You're totally right girl! I got loadda strong feeling, but I move on quick.

Yeah, I did forget my opinion didn't I.
Well....her interest isn't high in you. She seems like she wants to string you along like her ex...so by pushing her away, that's a good thing you did.

Really, she wants to play games with feelings and crap...start teasing her with your feelings, and how she has to start competing for you.

 

[mrRuckus]

as i pulled back in that convo we were having, she threw in the line "I guess if you can easily move on, then you dont have strong enough feelings for me"

i HATE how shes trying to use her ****ing ******** bullshyt on me

They expect you to be a movie star wuss who chases them down instead of a real man who can take it or leave it because he realizes there's millions of other chicks that can be his bride. Or whatever you're looking for. I've even explained this to a woman before but they're ill equipped for logic and will hear none of it.

The "one" stuff is nonsense.

You (general you) can easily move on because you're a man and don't have to sit in bed for a few days with rocky road and a box of tissues.

She was just baiting you. It doesn't matter if she thinks you don't care enough.

 

[skip2mylou781]

without sosuave (and the articles i read about this) I would deff have been telling her i love her and that i need her and ect ect..........I know that what I am doing now should probably work in getting her, but GOD i hate this "game"

telling her my true feelings = gaurantee she'll be turned off and not come back

pulling away further than she is = a good chance she will return and be interseted

I HATE GAMES

 

[Docs]

Well, you could try the one thing maybe 0.000015% of the times it worked...
or, play games back
or, FANCy!

 

[d9930380]

I think the big questions are:

How long have you been going out with her?
Did she dump the ex and for what reason?
Is she over the ex or thinking of getting back with him?

It sounds like you where the guy she used to make the other guy realise what a mistake he's made in losing her.

If you tell her you love her then she will break it off immediately because she doesn't want to REALLY hurt you and have you doing something nasty out of vengeance. If you play hard to get then she will be able to walk away without really caring what she's done because she will think it hasn't hurt you.

Either way mate, I think you're ****ed. But yea I suppose the walking away option saves your dignity and could give her a little head-**** that might increase her interest.

 

[skip2mylou781]

here is the email she wrote me - who can analyze this? (i saw her for 3 weeks, saw her about 7 times, fvcked her 3 times)

i want to be realistic as well. and the reality is, that i do care about you, no so much that infact it scared me. but so much that maybe one day it could. (not a bad thing)

i know you dont understand my reasoning for what i want. and i am sorry for that. i know how i feel about you. and i know how i feel about danny. and while i do love him, i'm no longer in love with him. i did not accept that ring, and i never plan to.

if you want to just pick up and move on, then please do so. it is only my fault if that is the case. i would never expect you to just wait around for me, we never got that serious. and i know just becasue you wont come crying to me and buy me expensive things in hope of forgiveness, does not mean you dont care. i would not expect anything like that from you in the first place.

i was very happy, and you were a BIG part of that, and i thank you for making me feel so. and it is something i truly do not want to loose, but like i said i need this time. so please dont wait for me, i would not want to. besides, i know you wont. but there honestly has to be a reason why i felt the way i did with you so soon, and while i cant put my finger on it, i know it means something. i think that is why i dont think i will loose you completly, but if i do, so be it, MY FAULT!

so thank you for trying to understand me the best you could. and thank you for making me feel so beautiful and special. you were one of the very few men that i know that could make me feel that way! you were always so amazing to me!

 

[Heyzeus]

to me that sounds like the typical girl trying to avoid feeling guilty. The typical girl technique of trying to drop a guy without hurting his feelings by saying it was all her fault and that she feels bad and that you were great or amazing but she needs her time etc.

This way she gets to break up and she doesn't feel any guilt from doing so.

But, i am not an expert on these things, i could be wrong, so don't necessarily take my word on it. That's just the impression i get.

 

[skip2mylou781]

to me that sounds like the typical girl trying to avoid feeling guilty. The typical girl technique of trying to drop a guy without hurting his feelings by saying it was all her fault and that she feels bad and that you were great or amazing but she needs her time etc.

This way she gets to break up and she doesn't feel any guilt from doing so.

But, i am not an expert on these things, i could be wrong, so don't necessarily take my word on it. That's just the impression i get.

refer to my other thread about her and how her AFC ex bf was trying to ruin shyt with me and her

 

[Docs]

She's all messed up in her head. I'd keep my distance for a while at least (if you're considering it). She has to sort herself out by herself...so send her the I'll be around, call me when you're ready.

-And then move on with your life....when/if she comes back, then you can decide.

 

[skip2mylou781]

HEY DOCSs - good advice, i said the following in reply to her email that i jsut posted:


"I'd always be amazing to you, hopefully you do whatever ends up making you the happiest........I know I'll be happy no matter what, so if you want me to share some of that happiness with you, feel free to join me - and if it is something special that we had, then I might still be available to share it all with you my XXXXX. Just be happy too, thats the end result that I want you to reach. You can talk to me whenever you want, hopefully I'll still be around."



I hope those "ill still be happy no matter what" and "hopefully I'll still be around" were good enough of a game to play on her to make her feel like she'll lose me......

 

[ObieJuan]

as i pulled back in that convo we were having, she threw in the line "I guess if you can easily move on, then you dont have strong enough feelings for me"

You say:

"Well, you already know how I feel; I'm not going to sit here and play games with you- and it sounds like you've already made up your mind. Bye."

It's over, anyway- might as well get the last word...but believe me when I say she's going to try to turn it around on you.

Indifference is the biggest weapon you have in your arsenal. By remaining unaffected by her words you can demonstrate your ability to be a man. Why play games when you can meet other people who are more worthy and want to spend time with you? Life doesn't revolve around women but it sure is nice to have 'em here and there. She may be a great girl but she's made her choice. There's no going back now.

 

[Docs]

skip, that wasn't bad at all. Focus is on you, and her having to decide to share in your wealths, or live her own.

Awesome.

 

[skip2mylou781]

skip, that wasn't bad at all. Focus is on you, and her having to decide to share in your wealths, or live her own.

Awesome.

not clingy at all right?