"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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My girlfriend's ego is inflating rapidly

GhostWriter

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My girlfriend usually has a lot of guys hitting on her since she's physically attractive. This is something I'm pretty much used to.

However, recently there has been an exponential increased rate at which guys have been hitting on her. This is getting to her head and now her ego is starting to inflate.

How do you deal with this?

I've been freezing her out in order to make a statement that I'm not going to give her any attention if she's going to get attention from several other guys.

It's been working so far as she always texts, calls and wants to meet up when I'm distant. However... I don't want her to get the impression that I'm pouting/jealous. I've spoken through my actions, is there anything else I can do in this situation?

For some reason, I'm starting to feel beta about always acting standoffish.

*I've also been negging the sh!t out of her in order to deflate her ego. What else would you do?

*4 months exclusive sexual relationship. Sex about 4 days a week, she also texts (initiates) me everyday. So I know her interest level is still up there.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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DMEDFISIK

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1) When you fear to lose her, you'll lose her.

2) Just continue working on yourself to be a better person almost everyday. Gym, studying, work, etc.

3) Don't do anything to jeopardize the relationship, like chasing other girls.

4) Don't be too distant but don't be too available either.

5) Don't get too lost in her. Save some of your heart for yourself.

General comment: There's a kind of confidence a man gets which comes from an intrinsic sense of his own value. This confidence can't be shaken by any woman. Furthermore, a true awareness that she isn't the best woman in the world, that she isn't the best you can get, that she has her own flaws and that you are a good catch will mitigate any perception of your inadequacies or subtle unworthiness. Finally, try to see beyond her looks most times--it will keep you grounded.
 

vatoloco

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I would add that you start looking at Plan B in case she's already planning to swing to a new branch.

It may not be the case but when women smell other pussy around you, if their IL is still high, they tend to come back into the straight and narrow.

Though my spider sense is tingling... how are you lowering her IL to the point that she's digging the attention from guys other than you...?
 

bukowski_merit

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GhostWriter said:
However, recently there has been an exponential increased rate at which guys have been hitting on her.
How do you know this? If she's telling you, it's disrespect. There's no reason a woman tells a guy things like this unless she's trying to tool him.


GhostWriter said:
This is getting to her head and now her ego is starting to inflate.
Give examples of her ego going up. Is she treating you badly now? Need examples...


GhostWriter said:
I've been freezing her out in order to make a statement that I'm not going to give her any attention if she's going to get attention from several other guys.
She really can't control other guys giving her attention. Women get hit on all day long (more so if they're good looking, even more so if they're average looking but have a nice body). What she can control is tooling you with it.

Freezing her out might not be appropriate. Better to show her you don't care.

Girl: This guy at work blah blah blah...
Me: Shhh... I'm trying to watch TV....
or
Me: That's nice.... I'm taking a shower now.

No reaction.


GhostWriter said:
It's been working so far as she always texts, calls and wants to meet up when I'm distant. However... I don't want her to get the impression that I'm pouting/jealous.
Women normally interpret distant as = pouting/jealous/angry. It needs to be done when you don't feel like dealing with whatever it is.

Woman giving me heavy drama over and over = freeze out. Not to get her to stop or play some mind game, but because i don't feel like dealing with that.


GhostWriter said:
I've spoken through my actions, is there anything else I can do in this situation?
See her differently.



GhostWriter said:
For some reason, I'm starting to feel beta about always acting standoffish.
Well, it can be very beta.



GhostWriter said:
*4 months exclusive sexual relationship. Sex about 4 days a week, she also texts (initiates) me everyday. So I know her interest level is still up there.
"Exclusive sexual relationship"? ???

4 months???

:D

There's a very good chance she's making her move to "tame her alpha" as some call it. Pushing to make you jealous. Make you uneasy. Give you some FEAR. Confuse you. Etc.

Would put smart money on her wanting more....
Possibly a real relationship.
A ring.
Marriage.
Children.
Happily ever after.

Possibly.

Happens in a lot of FB type relationships. I once had a woman openly flirt with 2 guys right in front of me. She later admited she was just trying to make me jealous because we were in a FB relationship for 2 months and she wanted more. Rare to have a woman admit that; so you often have to look for such things yourself.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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GhostWriter

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As to how am I lowering her interest level enough to where she enjoys attention from other men....

Don't women always enjoy attention? Thus the reason why they keep orbiters around even in relationships?

I posted a month ago where I failed to establish some vital boundaries because of my lack of experience in the relationship realm. This is probably the result of my failure.

I just get the impression of her not being modest anymore and enjoying the attention a little too much.

I will definitely start looking at Vato's plan B, Merit's advice on not reacting = as well as DMED's #2.

I just lose so much respect and attraction every time I have to put a woman in her place. I'd mirror her behavior only to have her wanting to compromise, but by then I don't care anymore because I don't think it should have come down to that in the first place.

Thanks for the replies.
 

zekko

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GhostWriter said:
I just get the impression of her not being modest anymore and enjoying the attention a little too much.
You don't give your ages, but she may be coming into her prime, a time when she is at peak sexual attractiveness. If a lot of guys are ramping up their interest in her, she may be feeling her sexual power. If she gets it into her head that she is going to want to experiment, there may be nothing you can do.

I don't think punishing her for guys noticing her is the answer. If she is attractive, this is going to happen. I proabably like what DMEDFISIK said the most.
 

GhostWriter

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zekko said:
You don't give your ages, but she may be coming into her prime, a time when she is at peak sexual attractiveness. If a lot of guys are ramping up their interest in her, she may be feeling her sexual power. If she gets it into her head that she is going to want to experiment, there may be nothing you can do.

I don't think punishing her for guys noticing her is the answer. If she is attractive, this is going to happen. I proabably like what DMEDFISIK said the most.
I'm 25 and she is 24. I'm definitely not punishing her b/c guys are noticing her, I'm punishing her because she is relishes the attention a little too much.

She is definitely in her prime, I'll just keep doing what I'm doing as it seems to be working right now.

Working on yourself and spinning plates always seems to be the answer eh.
 

Zarky

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Dating multiple women is always the answer, IMHO. "Game" is just the simulation of having multiple women in your life.
 
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