My Girl just broke up with me over facebook?!

[Swashbuckler]

Stayfly - It's just how she did it. I stayed up to 7 a.m. yesterday morning with her, and then heard the entire day about how she was sick and tired. Then she comes over after she got a little nap and everything is good we're spooning and making out.

Then I read a message 30 mins about how her school needs to come first, and if we're meant to be, we'll be together some day.

F That. I don't need that bs; I know she wrote that while she was sick and absolutely exhausted, so I'm like you live by things you decide. If you're going to act without thinking things through, then be prepared.

So I got her into a needy talk to me state of mind, and I deactivated my facebook, and I'm disappearing for awhile, so I can get over her, and she'll be constantly thinking about me and was it the right move.

The messages on facebook were retarded. "You're an amazing man" "You're incredible" "but just not now"

Then I was like I don't think we can be friends, so went into "I don't want to lose you" Bvtch if you didn't want to lose me then why the f' are you breaking up with me over facebook?

I'm sorry any girl who breaks up with you 3 days after you take her home to meet your family, and then she does it over facebook there's something wrong.

 

[kingsam]

this is very common- two people date in college then move back home , to the opposite ends of the country , and so it doesnt work out!

this broad is lacking some common courstesy if she thinks it ok to say that over facebook rather than face to face....good riddance
.....its probably better your rid of her now, than trying to keep it going and the RL goes all bad and you two end up really hating each other...and beleive me she definately has been thinking about this for a while

ON to a new chapter in your life!

 

[Igetit!]

Stayfly - It's just how she did it. I stayed up to 7 a.m. yesterday morning with her, and then heard the entire day about how she was sick and tired. Then she comes over after she got a little nap and everything is good we're spooning and making out.

Yeah,this kind of breakup does suck. And with her making out and spooning with you,that would deceive you into thinking that things were going ok.


The way she did it sucked,but my question is this....

Weren't you two going to break up anyway?


I mean you said that you'll be graduating soon and moving 4 hours away.

You weren't going to try and maintain a relationship with her from 4 hours away,were you?


She knows that you graduating and moving away in just around the corner.


Who knows,maybe she thought that you were going to break up with her first,so she decided to beat you to the punch.

Then I read a message 30 mins about how her school needs to come first,

Well we all know this is bull.

If you introduced her to your family,then obviously you two had been dating for a while.

So if you two had been together for a while,then why is it NOW all of the sudden that she need to put school first?


What,school wasn't important to her at the beginning of the relationship?

and if we're meant to be, we'll be together some day.

Translation:We'll NEVER be together again.

The messages on facebook were retarded. "You're an amazing man" "You're incredible" "but just not now"

An "amazing" man? "You're incredible"? She's laying it on kinda thick,ain't she?

This is basically the equivolent of when a guy asks a girl out and she starts telling him that he's "nice",or "sweet",or a "good person".



I guess she thinks that by trying to inflate your ego,it'll soften the blow of her rejecting you.



One thing that threw me off was when she said that she needs to focus on school,but yet,she wants to hang out with you a lot.



Just how does that work? She said that school needs to come first,but yet she wants to hang out with you a lot?



Uhh....wouldn't the hanging out with you a lot interfere with her focusing on school?




If I didn't know any better,it seems like she wants everything to be exactly the way it is now with you,only WITHOUT any sexuality between you two.




You can hang out as before,talk to each other as before,maybe even frequent some of the places you used to take her when you two were still dating,but all of it WITHOUT anything sexual going on.



If that's the case,then she's lying.


She's not doing this because she wants to put school first. She doing is because she no longer has any attraction for you.



She needs to put school first? Ok,so what's she going to do,stay single and celibate until she graduates college?



Oh pul-leeease.

 

[Kailex]

You actually replied to that over facebook?

I read this whole thread wondering if anyone was going to say anything about this.

There's absolutely NO way I reply back to her about this on Facebook, or at all, until she has the gall to actually come through with at LEAST a phone call.

So after she does her little Facebook shtick, she wants to meet you?

Why?

And she doesn't want to lose you???

BTW, Swashbuckler, I'd have to agree with Igetit! though. You were going to be 4 hours away... in the end, this girl did you a FAVOR. Now you get to move to a new place where you'll be completely free to meet whoever you want.

I know it sucks HOW she did it... and if one of US men did it, we'd be called cowards, but it's just the way women are.

And of course, she's using school as an excuse, we all know that's not the real reason... but in her mind, she'll always use that as HER excuse whenever someone asks her why she isn't with you anymore.

In my case, I would have responded with silence, because that would have just driven her NUTS.

 

[stayfly]

Stayfly - It's just how she did it. I stayed up to 7 a.m. yesterday morning with her, and then heard the entire day about how she was sick and tired. Then she comes over after she got a little nap and everything is good we're spooning and making out.

Then I read a message 30 mins about how her school needs to come first, and if we're meant to be, we'll be together some day.

F That. I don't need that bs; I know she wrote that while she was sick and absolutely exhausted, so I'm like you live by things you decide. If you're going to act without thinking things through, then be prepared.

So I got her into a needy talk to me state of mind, and I deactivated my facebook, and I'm disappearing for awhile, so I can get over her, and she'll be constantly thinking about me and was it the right move.

The messages on facebook were retarded. "You're an amazing man" "You're incredible" "but just not now"

Then I was like I don't think we can be friends, so went into "I don't want to lose you" Bvtch if you didn't want to lose me then why the f' are you breaking up with me over facebook?

I'm sorry any girl who breaks up with you 3 days after you take her home to meet your family, and then she does it over facebook there's something wrong.

I understand how you feel.

Try thinking about it from her perspective though. It would have been extremely difficult to do but was actually the right choice considering the circumstances and now you're punishing her for it?

Are you acting with love or with fear right now?

 

[Zarky]

Keep in mind the girl is very young. But I think you did the right thing. No sense in having her sending you sh!t to remind you of her. Concentrate on your other sh!t and then start dating other women. Breaking up in college or wherever is hard to do. Did it once and I still remember the pain 15 years later.

 

[Sir Psycho Sexy]

good job man

rep +1

 

[Swashbuckler]

Apparently, she read my book and really loved it, and she sent me a text saying "I wish you would have just let me give the book back because now [her roommate] is mad at me." Funny how she broke up with me THEN read my book...

I haven't responded at all. She tried hitting me up on aim, didn't respond.

 

[amoka]

Am I the only one who is interested in reading this girls' facebook breakup message?

 

[thewickedm]

nope you are not, im up for it too, but *looks around at the people waiting to tear it apart* i think its safer, though not necessarily wiser to not share it OP

 

[Swashbuckler]

It really doesn't matter; here is the first break up message. I deleted a reference to where I'm going to work.

"Ok so I've been wanting to talk to you about everything with us lately but its been hard cause of everything else that has been going on. I'm just thinking maybe we should slow down and maybe just be friends for right now. Im saying this because I dont know if I can handle being in a relationship with all my school work. These past few days have been hell. I've loved having you around but you distract me so much. I really need to concentrate on my school work. Also I've been thinking about how you're going to be leaving at the end of may, that will be so hard and I dont know if I can handle being in a long distance relationship during my senior year. You need to focus on graduating and getting that awesome job at [big company].
I really want us to be friends! This is not me saying I dont have feelings for you cause I completely do! I just think this relationship will cause my school work to suffer and I can't pay $40,000 a year to not do my very best. These past few weeks have been completely amazing! Thats why I really don't want to lose you as a friend but it is completely up to you. I would love to hang out with you as much as possible when I'm not going crazy trying to get work done.
My work just needs to come first right now.

Just please know that I really didnt want to do it like this but I couldnt seem to bring myself to tell you in person and that I really do care about you! You are an amazing person and if its meant to be between us then we will be together in the end, but right now I just cant handle a relationship.
I'm sorry! "

I'm slowly but surely getting over her. I'm purrrdy good right now. I've been staying at my friend's house. I'm waiting for my roommates to be like "Where are you? Are you safe?" She sent me a text today wanting to know when I'm giving back her DVDs. I didn't respond. I don't really give a fvck if she gets them or not; I'll give them back to her roommate so she can give them to her before I move.

 

[todays_news]

you'll have good spells and bad spells when it comes to getting over her.

my advice would be to spend as much time with family and friends as possible, keep busy, maybe get a hobby? gym perhaps? or like me I've started editing photos and designing basic webpages with gym sometimes too. Also get back in the game for finding more women!

4 hours distance, is not healthy for any relationship. and its tough, but breaking up over facebook? Come on man, cup your balls and have a good feel, because you can do better than any b*tch that does that.

Me and my ex broke up 2 months ago, I still think about her. But at the same time, I spend time with my mates, getting smashed meeting new people, new girls and having a ball. Its not all bad man, just remember!

Feel free to PM aswell brah. These things take time.

 

[stayfly]

she seems like a nice girl and she did what she felt was right (and probably was right as it allows you to both focus on ur study and let's you pursue other women if you choose).

why are you acting like such a dikk again?

just cause it was on facebook? or cause she met ur parents?

either way it doesn't make much sense to me. apart from you maybe getting some pleasure out of trying to make her feel like shyt for breaking up with you but that's fukking childish so I hope that's not what ur intentions are.

 

[todays_news]

she seems like a nice girl and she did what she felt was right (and probably was right as it allows you to both focus on ur study and let's you pursue other women if you choose).

why are you acting like such a dikk again?

just cause it was on facebook? or cause she met ur parents?

either way it doesn't make much sense to me. apart from you maybe getting some pleasure out of trying to make her feel like shyt for breaking up with you but that's fukking childish so I hope that's not what ur intentions are.

are you kidding me? are you that blind? when you break up, you do it face to face. its rule one of breaking up.

its not about whether she's nice or not, who gives a ****? this site is about its posters, not other people's feelings. He's cut up about breaking up, and your lecturing him on making her feeling shyt?

Women are manipulative, how do you know she even meant all of what she said? Dont be so naive....

 

[Swashbuckler]

Todays_news hell yea! That's what I'm saying.

I don't believe a lick of it. Apparently, she's going out of town over her birthday, and I know before we were dating she was in the midst of a long distance relationship with a guy in 700 miles away. I'm about 90% certain she's going to the wedding with him.

It's aggravating that she doesn't have the gaul to tell me straight up she is going back with him. People can get away to much with a false "School" excuse these days.

 

[stayfly]

are you kidding me? are you that blind? when you break up, you do it face to face. its rule one of breaking up.

its not about whether she's nice or not, who gives a ****? this site is about its posters, not other people's feelings. He's cut up about breaking up, and your lecturing him on making her feeling shyt?

Women are manipulative, how do you know she even meant all of what she said? Dont be so naive....

so what ur saying is if she broke up with him in person then everything would be different and he would be acting like a normal person?

but because it was on facebook that changes everything?

 

[stayfly]

Todays_news hell yea! That's what I'm saying.

I don't believe a lick of it. Apparently, she's going out of town over her birthday, and I know before we were dating she was in the midst of a long distance relationship with a guy in 700 miles away. I'm about 90% certain she's going to the wedding with him.

It's aggravating that she doesn't have the gaul to tell me straight up she is going back with him. People can get away to much with a false "School" excuse these days.

wait, it's because you think she's lying now that ur acting like a dikk?

I thought it was because it was on facebook or cause she met ur parents?

which one is it bro?

I'm curious about another thing too. has there been any other times were a girl broke up with you and you didn't act like a total dikk? if so, how were those breakups different to this one?

 

[todays_news]

so what ur saying is if she broke up with him in person then everything would be different and he would be acting like a normal person?

but because it was on facebook that changes everything?

no the fact that she did it on facebook, rubs salt into the wound. Its not cool, its rule one, everybody knows that.

And no if she did it in person, it might be easier for him to respect her as a friend. But at the end of the day, she broke up with him. She doesn't necessarily deserve his respect just from that, it all depends on how he chooses to deal with it.

And I really dont believe he is being a ****? In what way is he? Does it matter? As I said, this site is about supporting and giving advice to the poster. Its a community, do you or anyone else really give a **** about the girls feelings in all of this? Especially after she wrote over facebook? Hell, even if he was being a ****, I could kind of see his viewpoint.

 

[todays_news]

Todays_news hell yea! That's what I'm saying.

I know before we were dating she was in the midst of a long distance relationship with a guy in 700 miles away. I'm about 90% certain she's going to the wedding with him.

You shouldn't of got with her in the first place man, and if thats your feelings then you know you're making the right decision by moving on, and finding a new girl.

It's aggravating that she doesn't have the gaul to tell me straight up she is going back with him. People can get away to much with a false "School" excuse these days.

Well as i said, thats just a sad proportion of women. They're not all like that, but you should think as though they are haha. Move on my friend, this girls just a headfvck.

 

[Swashbuckler]

I'm at a friends place bouncing in and out of a party whilst making mexican food, and she texts me something I thought all along. This is her text word for word:

"Ok I completely fvcked up. And I hate what I have done. I've missed you so much and I hate being without you. I really hope you will talk to me. I want to try to fix everything that I've broken between us."