my gf kissed another guy - update

[flyinshark]

One week has passed after i've met my "cheating" gf in person. This thread talks about why i have put the word "cheating" in quotation marks.

The way she explained the her kiss with the other guy has surprised me and made me think. This is her version:

--start of story--
They had met on the street he ended up asking her to come in his apartment for 15 mins so they can talk, after which she had to go back home. She did stay for that amount of time and then she put her shoes and coat on, ready to leave his apartment.

At that moment, out of the blue, he surprised her with a short kiss on the lips. She supposedly was so surprised that she didn't have time to react in any way to that kiss. She then left without saying nothing.

He called her for the next 3 days, but she didn't answer his calls in the first two days, not wanting to talk to him after his behavior. On the 3rd day, monday, she picked up the phone just to tell him not to call her ever again because he abused her trust and the fact that she had told him that she had a boyfriend. She supposedly realised that he was a jerk and hated him for trying to kiss her despite him saying that he respected the fact that she had a bf.
--end of story--

Then, she called me to tell me what had happened the friday before (the kiss), and the rest you know from the other thread.

In the light of this version of the story, i felt like i should give her the benefit of the doubt. Not that i buy the story completely, but it made me think that MAYBE that's what really happened, and in that case it wouldn't be fair to break up with her, as she maybe was just a naive victim to a player.

I think i have enough dandruff on my shoulders from scratching my head thinking whether this story is true or not. I now wanna know what do u guys think of it.

Any thoughts about this story?

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Originally posted by flyinshark



They had met on the street he ended up asking her to come in his apartment for 15 mins so they can talk, after which she had to go back home. She did stay for that amount of time and then she put her shoes and coat on, ready to leave his apartment.

At that moment, out of the blue, he surprised her with a short kiss on the lips. She supposedly was so surprised that she didn't have time to react in any way to that kiss. She then left without saying nothing.

Why did she even allow the above to happen? I didn't read your other thread, but the real question is why was she even going to a stranger's appartment? Wether the story is a lie or true, it really doesn't make any sense. Was she really interested in checkin' out his stamp collection?

 

[Tkman]

lol, your girl is a ho3 ... only ho3s go to strangers apt !

"because he abused her trust"

what trust ? the 15 min trust ... give me a break !

 

[trancer]

im not sure why you keep coming back here with this. You need to make your OWN CHOICE. Are you going to make or break your life with this chick over **** you read on the net?

People on here will make decisions based on the circumstances, but are you prepared to look past that and know your own gut feelings?

Is she really that good? Do you want a chick that can so easily get caught up with another guy when your in a relationship?

 

[Dominant]

The previous two posts are right on target.

Even if this girl was completely truthful with her story, which she probably isn't, she doesn't sound very mature.

In terms of a girlfriend, she sounds like bad news.

Move on man.

-Dominant

 

[MindOverMatter]

didn't u call her on sunday and make a joke about whether he kissed her or not yet, and she said "no he's not like that", then later u found out she did.

she lied once, what makes you think she's telling you the truth now?

and in that case it wouldn't be fair to break up with her, as she maybe was just a naive victim to a player.

lol man, listen to yourself.

 

[arq-dj1]

and the kiss lasted 25minutes?


or was just 2sec kiss with her not even moving her mouth?


if u can answer this questions you will know what to do

 

[flyinshark]

Originally posted by Gangster Of Love
Why did she even allow the above to happen? I didn't read your other thread, but the real question is why was she even going to a stranger's appartment? Wether the story is a lie or true, it really doesn't make any sense. Was she really interested in checkin' out his stamp collection?

This guy wasn't a total stranger. They had met a few times before, so he had gained enough trust from her to be able to convince her to come in his apartment.

Originally posted by MindOverMatter
didn't u call her on sunday and make a joke about whether he kissed her or not yet, and she said "no he's not like that", then later u found out she did.

she lied once, what makes you think she's telling you the truth now?

quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
and in that case it wouldn't be fair to break up with her, as she maybe was just a naive victim to a player.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

lol man, listen to yourself.[/B]

While thinking of a way of explaining to you why she lied, i had a revelation!

OMGF! I know it's very LATE for me to realize this, but if she really was pissed off at him and felt like a victim, she would have called me right away on friday, or on saturday the latest, telling me "omg, flyinshark, this f***ing bastard just tried to kiss me..i thought he was a friend...AH, the jerk!"

The fact that she didn't call me, and the fact that she lied to me on sunday means that she was feeling GUILTY. You don't feel guilty when somebody abuses your trust, do u?? She was guilty because she probably wanted that kiss to happen and maybe even actively participated to the kiss.

That's it, she's gone!

 

[flexion_]

Often when you do something bad people will tell a lesser version of the truth just incase some rumour gets back around.

I can't think of any possible reason for a girl to go to a guys' appartment that is innocent. Hey it would be different if there were a group of girls or something...

 

[Kerensky]

I read your post, and the AFC inside started crawling out.

But then I promptly beat the shiat out of him.

Why?

If it was so innocent, why'd she hide it from you for THREE DAYS. wtf eh? She shoulda told you and as her 'protector' figure, she shoulda came to you and told you about it so you coulda done something. I think she is lying....put this behind you, and never visit it again. Stick with your decisions.

When jumping a gorge, it isn't those that decide to jump across that die. It is those who change their mind in midair.

Good luck mate.

 

[penkitten]

Originally posted by flyinshark



Any thoughts about this story?

honey, sit down cause i have to tell you something:

she IS NOT your girlfriend any more .

stop this insane madness.

no one kisses someone else on accident.

when your girlfriend kisses someone else, that is it. that is the end of your relationship.

i wish you the best of luck and hope the next girlfriend will not be a cheater.
you did nothing wrong and didnt deserve this.

 

[Kerensky]

Re: Re: my gf kissed another guy - update

Originally posted by penkitten
honey, sit down cause i have to tell you something:

she IS NOT your girlfriend any more .

stop this insane madness.

no one kisses someone else on accident.

when your girlfriend kisses someone else, that is it. that is the end of your relationship.

i wish you the best of luck and hope the next girlfriend will not be a cheater.
you did nothing wrong and didnt deserve this.

penkitten, you're surprisingly objective. And I respect that.

 

[Luveno]

Flyingshark,

you're right. Nobody feels guilty about something they didn't do. She did something wrong..she got wrapped up in the moment and kissed some guy. It was her choice, and she wasn't thinking of you when she did it.

Good for you making the decision to drop her.

 

[christz]

uhh yeah how many months have you been dateing this girl? because i damn sure know this is a new relationship and not an LTR

 

[penkitten]

i think you made yourself a wise choice there flyingshark

good ridins to that kind of drama.

next!

 

[coder]

Congrats, flyinshark for finally stopping the self delusion. You knew the truth all along, but did want to swallow it because it hurt. It hurt your heart and your ego. When the ego gets hurt, it fight back with self delusions to protect itself. Don't let it. A few months ago my sister died because she, her husband, her mother and my dad all deluded themselves rather than face an ugly truth. It was a real eye opener for me. When your intellect tells you one thing and your heart tell your another, listen to your intellect. Take care, my friend, there's a much sweeter girl right around the corner!

 

[flyinshark]

Originally posted by christz
uhh yeah how many months have you been dateing this girl? because i damn sure know this is a new relationship and not an LTR

I had been with her for 5 months.

 

[white_hype]

get her phone and call the dude, i guarantee his number is in there (prlly a different name) if you dont want to let her go

but if it was me i'd laugh at her and say BYE

 

[CLOONEY]

Damn, another cheater, what a surprise

 

[penguin]

....Wh....Why is this still going? I am confused.

She has her own mind, and she cheated on you. She made the decision. Repeat this to yourself. She made the decision.

And guess what? She made the decision. Nobody forced her to go anywhere with him.

By now she should be nothing but a memory for you.