My gf dumped me I was horrible what now?

[wonderer]

My gf of 1.5 years dumped me last night. This was after a series of events where I was unfair. I got another girls number infront of her, didn't see her much, didn't care, then the last straw was making no effort on her bday which was a big deal for her- she went home early from a club we were at and was texting me and calling begging me to come home and I didn't for an hour.

She ended up dumping me because she said I wasn't there for her when she needed me most, she said she was frightened and very unwell. The night before I ended up in hospital and she had spent the entire night with me there, and I couldn't be there for her and come home.

She was hysterically crying, calling me a c*nt, said I ruined her bday, broke her heart, she wanted to kill herself, worst day of her life etc. I didn't know what to say.

I have wanted to end things with her for some time, but felt the timing wasn't right with Christmas and her bday and had planned to try and end it at the end of this month in a way to minimise as much pain as possible, not like this.

I feel awful, I still care about her and wouldn't wish this on anyone, I have f*cked up her life.

Is there anything I can do? Do I go NC forever? Do I apologise then go NC? I feel this would make her feel better.

I don't want to get back with her, I just want to make sure she is ok.

 

[AllDay85]

NC forever guy, no matter how hard it is. There isn't a guy on the planet, who, looking back on his life in his final years, thinks to himself, "i wish i would have stayed talking to that psycho ex."

Think about yourself.

 

[wonderer]

NC forever guy, no matter how hard it is. There isn't a guy on the planet, who, looking back on his life in his final years, thinks to himself, "i wish i would have stayed talking to that psycho ex."

Think about yourself.

Is she a psycho? I disconnected months ago, I am fine. I am worried about her. Everything was very heated, I am thinking of giving her some time, then having one final conversation - we are not getting back together, but I am sorry. Then nc forever.

 

[Albatross953]

Yep, quick goodbye and go ghost. Do the humane thing.

 

[l__i__l]

I'm struggling to understand how she is a psycho from your account of events.
A relationship for 1.5 years is no short time, her reactions to your disrespectful attitude is justifiable.
I'm sure you would not put up with it either, if roles were reversed. (minus the emotions).
It's good you've acknowledged your mistakes, now acknowledge them to her and go NC.
Always end things sooner rather than later.

 

[logicallefty]

No doubt she is psycho. The wanting to kill herself thing is the worst of her part of this. But it isn't all her IMO. I don't agree with you getting another number in front of her. If a GF did that to me I would dump her on the spot and tell her she can explain herself to me in the next lifetime if she wants, but not this one. DONE. Other than that, if it will give you closure then go ahead and have one last conversation with her, then go ghost. Do not let her rope you in to long drawn out contact. Say your words, let her say hers, wish her well, and poof!

 

[Julian]

OP you sound like an azzhole...i can relate

just regret your actions that were wrong...give her a little time...good chance she will come crawlin back if thats what u want but it seems like not

 

[wonderer]

She text me and asked me to come round today, I was convinced I was going to end it, i said my piece and said I dont know how we can move forward with all these problems, she said she does not get enough affection from me and I dont show how I love her, she said she hasnt slept or eaten properly in 4 days and that she wanted to end her life without me, she said she was a f*ck up and had f*cked up her life - I caved, I care about her and couldn't see her in such a mess.

The lack of sleep and food has affected her head, I said this has been physically and mentally draining for both of us, and that there had been a lot of negativity in our relationship and that this could not continue, I said this as a way out in the near future, I am hoping that when I end things it will be a little easier, and nextt ime