"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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My "GF,BC" Just contacted me for the first time in 4 weeks, advice before i respond.

Plain & Simple

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Ok well i dont know how many of yall read the thread that i made one time but anway u dont have to, this is what happened me and this girl started "going out" but outta nowhere she stops calling me and i stop too i was the one that made all the calling and whatnot until i decided that that was enough.
She was also very demanding and just kind of thought her **** dont stink kinda girl, so we didnt talk for like 4 weeks.


Now out of nowhere she sends me a message thru myspace ( coincidence that i took her off my top friends last night too)
She says :

. hoLa . .. yoU kno . i miss yoU a littLe biT . whaTs uP wiTh yoU . ?? . we dont taLk no moRe . . gReg wAs telLin me how yoU dId a sHow ThE OthEr nIghT . . thAts good . . i guess . . aNd how yoU aLwaYs busY . buT thAts noT bAd . cuz i am busY aLot now too . i have night sChooL again . . aNd mY parenTs aLwaYs got me doin someThin on the weekends . . espeCialLy sundaYs . . . im about to get a weekend job so im not goin to be wiTh them anYmoRe . so im trYin to sPend as muCh time as i cAn now . . . . hope to be abLe to see you soon . or aTLeasT geT in touCh . . laTer . .

Ok now where do i go from here i just got the message.

Should i let her wait and suffer, or should i contact her?, if so how long do i wait...?

Lol It feels so good to be in this position:) it feels like total control.[/b]
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Plain & Simple

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Im also suspecting that now that valentines day is coming she wanna get close...i do not like valentines day
 

Cremasta

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There's no heart behind this message... she sent the same thing to everyone she knows and hasn't seen for a while.

Ignore it, if she really wanted to catch up, she wouldn't stop at a myspace message.
 

Plain & Simple

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interensting although in this situation i know for a fact that wasnt the case.
i like the way u think though
 

thirtyplus

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Next. Next next next next next.

There is so much equivocating and lack of risk-taking in that message it makes my physically ill.

Let some other poor slob deal with her lousy attitude.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Plain & Simple

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true true,
 

92 GSR-4

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yep I wouldnt reply and see if she takes it further.

Remember women will give you just enough attention to keep you going and then shut you out again. They toy with guys, and thats how they make themselves feel good...sad to say.
 

tobby

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Remember women will give you just enough attention to keep you going and then shut you out again. They toy with guys, and thats how they make themselves feel good...sad to say.
This guy's got the geist of it. Most women do this stuff all the time. (My sister did this stuff alot too). There's usually 1 or 2 reasons for it:

1. She's just a good person, thought about you, and wanted see how things were going. Women never are good at telling the truth, instead of being honest, they do some ****ty thing like "not calling anymore" or suddenly vanishing.

2. She's single/hasn't found anyone else yet, and wants a surrogate (sp?) boyfriend for the time being. Someone to take her out, pay attention to her, etc. until she finds someone else.
 

MacAvoy

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Exactly, ignore her. If your truly busy with other stuff, your not sitting at home checking your myspace waiting for her to message you. Let her make REAL contact by calling you, then when she asks why you didn't respond to her msg, say what msg
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Microphone Fiend

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Cremasta said:
There's no heart behind this message... she sent the same thing to everyone she knows and hasn't seen for a while.

Ignore it, if she really wanted to catch up, she wouldn't stop at a myspace message.
what he said...trust me.
 

Plain & Simple

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^^^like i said i know for a fact that that is not the case...
 

juslen

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She is trying to save face. She feels guilty about not talking to you anymore and she is lonely. So she sends you a myspace message because its simple and it allows her to contact you without worrying about rejection or reaction.

She is feeling you out. Hoping you will contact her again and act as if everything is fine, and forgive her. It appears to me that she has a low self esteem.. and that she cant function without having a guy in here life.

The real question is. Why did she stop talking to you 4 weeks ago. And who was she with, or trying to be with in those 4 weeks. I'm sorry to say this. But she was most likely looking for better options and she they fell through. If not.. she has emotional issues and figures she can try to get back with you.

Its a lose lose situation for you. Yeah you get a power trip. But thats simply the deception of lust and control. You are playing a game that neither of you will win. People just don't stop talking to one for no good reason. If you two were dating, and the phone calls stopped. Then it never really was a true relationship.

I suggest that you find a new girl. Demote this one to friendship status. See her when its best for you. Don't play her games.

my 2 cents.
 

Plain & Simple

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juslen said:
She is trying to save face. She feels guilty about not talking to you anymore and she is lonely. So she sends you a myspace message because its simple and it allows her to contact you without worrying about rejection or reaction.

She is feeling you out. Hoping you will contact her again and act as if everything is fine, and forgive her. It appears to me that she has a low self esteem.. and that she cant function without having a guy in here life.

The real question is. Why did she stop talking to you 4 weeks ago. And who was she with, or trying to be with in those 4 weeks. I'm sorry to say this. But she was most likely looking for better options and she they fell through. If not.. she has emotional issues and figures she can try to get back with you.

Its a lose lose situation for you. Yeah you get a power trip. But thats simply the deception of lust and control. You are playing a game that neither of you will win. People just don't stop talking to one for no good reason. If you two were dating, and the phone calls stopped. Then it never really was a true relationship.

I suggest that you find a new girl. Demote this one to friendship status. See her when its best for you. Don't play her games.

my 2 cents.
Believe me she has already been dropped to friend status not even only friend status when i see u on the street if i see u a quick hi , how u doing and bye.
Although i doubt it she was probably trynna get with somebody and her plan didnt work out so as u said now shes trying to see what she can do with me... little do she know that her is not an option in my bench.

I might use her in the future for some quick head anytime i feel horny or whatnot but for now she is not gonna hear from me.

oh and believe me its worst when u logg back on to ur myspace and u see that the person was online but that they didnt reply to u , shell feel like **** then:)
 

DJDamage

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She knows that you liked her and at this moment for some reason's she can't attain guy number 1 attention or guy number 2 or 3's attention. Thus it all comes back to the guys who gave her constant attention at the bottom of the barrel, and that is what she is after. As soon as you start something with this one and she starts getting attention from the guys that REALLY make's her panties wet (that is the reason she stopped calling you the first time, so drop the ego on this one k??!!), she will be out of you life the same way she left the first time.

When it comes to women, if it ended in the trash the first time around you are better of seeking newer and exciting women and not go back, because you will find yourself in the same pradicement.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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