"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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My first "rejection" and a sad realization

apprenticedj

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During the past few weeks I was hooking up with a chick I met at a bar. She was my first piece of ass since separating from my wife 6 months ago. In fact this was my first ever bar hookup/f-close, EVER (I was in a LTR/married for the bulk of my prime bar years so far, 22-28). I wasn't overly attracted to her, she did have a nice big booty but overall no better than HB5.5. We slept together about a dozen times and everything was cool. Anyway, she hit me up the other day saying that she has recently started seeing someone and that she enjoyed our time together etc. No big deal really but for some reason I found myself a little butthurt. I responded with polite indifference so I maintained my frame, no AFC behaviour, left the possibilty open for fvcking her in the future. But INTERNALLY I felt a little pissed, she was blowing me up all day, wanting to hang out every night and then all of the sudden this. And what's worse is I didn't really like her, I felt that I was "better" than her and her text kinda kicked my ego abit. This definitely made it clear to me that I need to develope a thicker skin to "rejection" so ANY TIPS would be greatly appreciated.

Now my realization: I'm 90% sure she went back with her EX, doesn't matter, she could be banging Obama, the WHO is irrelevant really but it got my mind working on the subject of "single" women. Last week I was fvcking her and now she's seeing somebody else, presumed the ex. And I'm sure she's telling this person that she wasn't seeing anybody else besides them, just working on herself, hanging with her girls etc and depending on his AFC-ness he might be inclinded to believe her. But she was literally swallowing my babies last week!!! In my days before I found this awesome forum I might have believed her too! But now I'm starting to see a different side of these delicate creatures and it ain't so pretty. And you know what? I'm glad I had this epiphany now before I started drinking some "single" girls koolaid. A further realization that I need to encapsulate my heart in a deep layer of ice and take EVERY SINGLE WORD that comes out of a "single" womans mouth with a grain salt. It's a cold world fellas and I haven't even ventured out far, maybe I should just stay out of the woods?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Bokanovsky

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apprenticedj said:
But INTERNALLY I felt a little pissed, she was blowing me up all day, wanting to hang out every night and then all of the sudden this. And what's worse is I didn't really like her, I felt that I was "better" than her and her text kinda kicked my ego abit. This definitely made it clear to me that I need to develope a thicker skin to "rejection" so ANY TIPS would be greatly appreciated.
You would care much less if you were spinning other plates. Losing a $100 bill means nothing when you've got a billion in the bank.
 

VikingKing

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Yeah man. things that are common don't have much value, things that are scarce (or perceived to be scarce) have more value.
 

hockeyfreak79

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So you banged her a dozen times in a couple weeks? You gave her to much attention & lost the frame, she's riding the c0ck carousel yet again. Spin plates, get the ONEtis out off your system. HB5....Baah she's a backer burner FB just use protection or just move on.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Albatross953

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Dude, she did you a favour. Warmed you up then left!

Does she have any cute friends you met?

I vote you go back in the woods. There's more in there then low class 5s!
 

sylvester the cat

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So although you are pretending to be indifferent, you are not really indifferent?

If you are not genuinely indifferent, which you said you weren't, then pretending doesn't mean sh!t.

i don't know what you do with that knowledge but apparently according to some highly respected members here, its true.

Might as well end things now OP. There's no hope for you.

Either that or continue to pretend being indifferent. As long as you don't stop pretending to be indifferent there is no way she will be able to tell and so in her eyes you will have been indifferent thus making you in some way indifferent on a very real and genuine level. there. i did it!
 

Tictac

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Sly,

Rejection always sucks. But it's a big part of being a Don Juan. If you're not getting an occasional rejection and failing with some of the women you meet, you're not trying very hard and you are settling for what you do get.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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apprenticedj

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sylvester the cat said:
So although you are pretending to be indifferent, you are not really indifferent?

If you are not genuinely indifferent, which you said you weren't, then pretending doesn't mean sh!t.

i don't know what you do with that knowledge but apparently according to some highly respected members here, its true.

Might as well end things now OP. There's no hope for you.

Either that or continue to pretend being indifferent. As long as you don't stop pretending to be indifferent there is no way she will be able to tell and so in her eyes you will have been indifferent thus making you in some way indifferent on a very real and genuine level. there. i did it!
You're right, I guess I'm not really indifferent but pretending to be, sorta "fake it til you make it" but this one is done. I'm not holding out hope or anything, I'll never call or text her again but if I see her out in a few months I'd be more than open to tapping that juicy booty again.
 

sylvester the cat

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apprenticedj said:
You're right, I guess I'm not really indifferent but pretending to be, sorta "fake it til you make it" but this one is done. I'm not holding out hope or anything, I'll never call or text her again but if I see her out in a few months I'd be more than open to tapping that juicy booty again.
well according to this thread (see below), you're f*cked mate. sooner or later you're going to go running back to her begging her to take you back,

unless you become genuinely indifferent. i would suggest pretending to be indifferent until you become genuinely indifferent but apparently that wont work.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=209317
 
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