"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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My first oneitis since my awakening

Celadus

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Well, I thought I was cured of this "the one" crap. I don't think she's the only one, just a good one...If I wasn't around her everyday I'd get over her quickly. I just see potential.

I work a night job with a bunch of college kids. There's one girl thats 19. She's cute in a smoky, sexy kind of way. We've been giving each other the eye for the past two weeks. And she was making comments like (we work in a call center) "I like talking to singles because I can relate, but I don't want too"

I just couldn't find an opportunity to talk to her one on one to get her number until tonight. It lead to a lot of awkward tension. Unlike the other girls I deal with, I actually like this one and was too nervous to talk to her around others.

She's the spitting imagine of me when I was 19. Partying a lot, drinking and trying different types of drugs but she's not an attention ***** at all. She's not good at being a girl at all.

Today she went to take a smoke break and when she came back, the gay guy next to her said "Did he follow you?" and she said "No" in an angry voice. Yesterday, I went to talk to her but she went to the bathroom instead of a smoke break and she saw me and told the gay guy. She said "I messed up. I usually smoke a cigaratte first" Today, a few minutes later she started talking outloud about her never having a boyfriend and she can't imagine getting married.

The problem is that I'm her oneitis too. And she's really awkward around me. I asked for her number tonight and she gave it to me and started babbling "What do you want to do? What do you want to do?" And I started acting awkward. I screwed up and said "hang out" instead of "date". We are both about 13 mentally when it comes to each other. She's a partying female AFC...or something.

Any suggestions on how to handle this? I'm definitely going to keep talking to other chicks but this one is tough to be around....I thought this crap was over. :crazy:
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Serialized3

Master Don Juan
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Well, I think saying "hang out" was actually better than saying "date". It's my experience with college girls that they'd rather hang out and get to know you and have it all low pressure and ambiguous (friend? date?) than to add the pressure of the label "date" and the idea of "girlfriend" and all that on them. She already sounds like she's somewhat nevous around you, and by making it a low pressure type of situation she'll probably find it easy to become more comfortable with you.

And you've only known her for about 2 weeks already, if I read that right, and you're already overanlyzing her and making all these assumptions about her. You should probably try to stop thinking about her so much (spin plate's as the players here say, or pay more attention to your hobbies or something). You probably already know how fickle 19 year old party girls can be.

So:

1. Don't overanalyze and assume. Just go with the flow and try to enjoy her company.
2. Keep it low pressure.
3. Don't get your expectations up too high.

Hope I helped.
 

Celadus

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Jesus. I got my mojo back. I was just stressing over being in a new area and having to carve out my piece of the world. I just hate not getting what I want. I slept with her and immediately lost interest. :)
 

KontrollerX

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I think you did alright man.

Just try to remain calm and follow Serialized advice LOL.
 
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