My first LTR (PS: She didn't kiss me on the first date)

[ARrocket]

TL;DR: I've been dating this girl, and I had to move very slowly to get her. So don't always assume if she doesn't suck your c0ck within 10 minutes of meeting her, she's an attention wh0re.

Gentleman,

Haven't been around here much lately. I know nobody actually gave a sh!t (or noticed), but I'll pretend someone cared. I've gotten into a LTR with a girl I met on a cold approach back in January. I'm not here to brag - she's a 7 when she tries, if I'm to be honest.

She's nearly 3 years younger than me, and grew up in Asia...been living in my city for 5 years now. She seems to have a lot of those traditional views, but one can tell that her time over here has opened up her mind a bit more.

I'm her first everything (believe me, I had the blood-soaked sheets to prove it...yuck). She didn't gave me the cheek when I tried to kiss her after the first date, and Sosuave brainwashed me thought that meant she wasn't interested. Well, I took her out again, and proceeded a bit more slowly. First, hold her hand...then hold her...then kiss...etc. Took 2 more dates. Took 2 more dates before a full-on makeout session. Took 2 months for sex (but, we didn't see each other much due to being busy with school, so really, like 10 dates).

Maybe this is normal in her country, but I guess she assumed we were in a relationship after we had kissed - she began referring to me as her boyfriend, although we hadn't had any sort of conversation. I didn't really see this coming, and I hooked up with a few other girls during this time. She could sense that I wasn't really being genuine with her (somehow), and decided she wanted to break things off because I was 'making her feel stupid.'

Well, I decided to swallow my pride and some of my DJ training, and reached out to her. Told her I want to be with her.

So far so good. No sh!t tests, always counteroffers (and apologizes) if she can't make plans I set up, and although she was very inexperienced and wanted to move slowly, she made an effort to move things forward. I respect that, and genuinely enjoy spending time with her.

I'm not saying this is some sort of fairytale, and I know there's a pretty high probability that this won't last all that long. What I came to say is that every girl is different, that there are "good" girls out there (especially for the younger DJs out there), and she can still like you even if she doesn't kiss you on the first date. I've said it many times, and I'll say it again: YOU have to decide for yourself if moving at her speed is worth it for you.

That said, I'm gonna try to visit more often, even though I see this board has gotten out of hand over the past few months

 

[Mr Wright]

Congrats dude!

There are no real rules that you have to follow, you can break any rules you like as long as you are going for what you want.

 

[bigneil]

Although a girl might not kiss you on the first date, she should still be highly attracted.

 

[DragonBlood]

I'm not here to brag - she's a 7 when she tries, if I'm to be honest.

At least your honest, because I think most of the 'DJ mindset' is for HB8-9 who play all these games and have lots of options.

Probably never met someone so suave as you before AR and she was taking things slow from a place of fear. Next guy wont be so lucky lol.

 

[BeDJ]

There are other forums that give better advice for pursuing LTR's. SoSuave is a community that encourages young men to develop Game; becoming mentally and emotionally grown as to not fall in the traps of life. Striving to be a man who commands respect from all those around him. Understanding the dating mechanics to avoid crippling mistakes. Desiring commitment and intimacy is not the goal of SS.

I have to ask, why do refer to your relationship as a LTR?

What glares at me is that you became exclusive with her AFTER she wanted to break things off with you. Do you think that she would have left you if she wanted to be your GF? This is the biggest SH!T TEST beginning DJ's fall for. Her reason was irrelevant, the medium is the message.

 

[JohnChops]

Thank you AR. If a girl doesn't fvck you after the first date it doesn't mean she's not interested. Seriously sometimes moving to fast to push a girl to a lay could drive her away. You just have to recognize which girls are the ones you go slow with and the ones who you bang on the first date.