CGE333
Senior Don Juan
I don’t know about you all but I was able to get some great bonding time in with the family over the weekend. It helps that HBO had back to back Stallone movies. First up was “Over the Top”, in which Stallone plays a truck driving arm wrestler. During the movie Stallone drives a truck around, arm wrestles, and bonds not only with his son but also with some of the guys he holds hands with, and then drives the truck some more. I defy you to name one person who has seen that movie who did not immediately enroll in their local truck driving school. I feel this movie will do for truck drivers what Roadhouse did for bar bouncers and Showgirls did for topless dancers.
Next up was “Cobra”. In this one Stallone plays a renegade cop willing to work on both sides of the law to defeat evil, think Lethal Weapon without a storyline or script. Stallone is tasked with protecting Bridgitte Nielsen, who was being hunted down by evil bastards who wanted to kill her all because of her nappy hairdo (at least I think that is why they were chasing her). I swear LA can be such a tough town. There is one steamy sex scene here where we see our hero is quick on the draw in more ways than one. They certainly could’ve named this one Spitting Cobra. Finally after witnessing a fellow cop make about a dozen calls from pay phones only to have the evil murdering bastards show up 30 seconds later, Cobra our tough-talking Einstein, figures out there is rat in the police department, and only moments I might add after Helen Keller figured it out. The movie ends with one fantastic, balls to the wall, all out fight scene, where Stallone dispatches the bad guys one by one (because they aren’t smart enough to all come at him all at once). When it was over I swear the family had tears in their eyes, but in between sobs I managed to say, “Thank god that Cobra is on our side”.
I tell you, this Stallone guy can act, and I have a lot of credibility here as I was the first one in the family to recognize the natural acting ability in that future Academy Award winner Corey Haim. The frustrating thing is that you know on some director’s desk in Hollywood there is an underdog boxer wins the Heavyweight Championship story or a Vietnam Vet still fighting the system script that Stallone would be perfect for.
Next up was “Cobra”. In this one Stallone plays a renegade cop willing to work on both sides of the law to defeat evil, think Lethal Weapon without a storyline or script. Stallone is tasked with protecting Bridgitte Nielsen, who was being hunted down by evil bastards who wanted to kill her all because of her nappy hairdo (at least I think that is why they were chasing her). I swear LA can be such a tough town. There is one steamy sex scene here where we see our hero is quick on the draw in more ways than one. They certainly could’ve named this one Spitting Cobra. Finally after witnessing a fellow cop make about a dozen calls from pay phones only to have the evil murdering bastards show up 30 seconds later, Cobra our tough-talking Einstein, figures out there is rat in the police department, and only moments I might add after Helen Keller figured it out. The movie ends with one fantastic, balls to the wall, all out fight scene, where Stallone dispatches the bad guys one by one (because they aren’t smart enough to all come at him all at once). When it was over I swear the family had tears in their eyes, but in between sobs I managed to say, “Thank god that Cobra is on our side”.
I tell you, this Stallone guy can act, and I have a lot of credibility here as I was the first one in the family to recognize the natural acting ability in that future Academy Award winner Corey Haim. The frustrating thing is that you know on some director’s desk in Hollywood there is an underdog boxer wins the Heavyweight Championship story or a Vietnam Vet still fighting the system script that Stallone would be perfect for.
Fantastic review!