"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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My ego is getting too big...

I-am-someone

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 30, 2004
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41
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the Netherlands
Okay, here's the deal.

Over the last year, the amount of IOI's I've been receiving has gone from maybe 5% of women, to about 95% of women.

I walk into any random place, where women are, and I have eye-contact. The 6s become shy, the 9s give straight eye-contact back.

I start talking to any random girl, and I get immediate giggles, playing with her hair, women kino-ing me before I kino them, everything.

AFC's would think this sounds like heaven. But it isn't.

It's addictive. Once you've felt that feeling, it must continue.
Once it stops (it's not always "on") you suddenly feel like sh!t.

I feel like my ego is getting too big. I have a girlfriend, with whom my relationship has been going in ups and downs. Now, I'm treating her with absolutely no respect whatsoever. I'm being a complete a$$hole, and I can't even help it. I've basically become the kind of person I used to hate.
It's even gotten to the point, where this is starting to affect my scholastic performance. I spend so much time flirting, that I spend less and less time on school. Half the projects I do, I do together with girls - and that usually just means flirting, having fun together and massive kino'ing. Whereever I go, girls approach me and start talking to me.

Basically, my ego has become dependant on female approval, and to be honest it's not a very stable state.


Why the fvck am I writing this?? Not to boost my ego!

It's because I'm beginning to hate this way of life.
I want more control over my own ego/self-esteem, and I want to be able to properly fulfil my obligations to school. I've been addicted to drugs in the past, and I've kicked the habit, which was easier than this.

Anybody got some advice for me?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
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Galt's Gulch
I-am-someone said:
...Anybody got some advice for me?
Just because you can beat off every day it doesn't mean that you have to.

Let's see Confucius come up with something better than that! :woo:
 

Rex Man

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 18, 2005
Messages
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Location
Midwest
Don't worry, I've been through exactly what you're describing.

Sometimes all the girls are looking you're way and you can't do wrong. Other times no matter what you do, it doesn't go like it should.

It still happens to me but what you should do is this; on one of your 'off' days divert your attention from women competely. If you keep focusing on the 'off' situation you will only make matters worse trust me.

worry leads to desperastion, but if you don't let the off times get to you, you won't have anything to worry about. :yes:
 

BluEyes

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2006
Messages
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9
Forget girls for afew weeks and focus on yourself. Get better at whatever it is you like to do, and try out new things. Take bartending classes, take guitar lessons, whatever it is you've always wanted to do.

Time to relearn that you can also have confidence and fun away from females.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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