"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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My Dilemma with trying to pick up girls

FreeStyleZ

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Well first off im black at a prodominately white school. Alot of the white girls here had never seen any black guys back at home, so they dont really go for them. So my dilemma is that most of the girls that are attracted to me physically are black, but im not "ghetto" like they're used to so they don't go for my personality. With white girls they arent physically attracted to me and alot dont give ya a chance due to your looks. And if a girl is attracted to me physically then she's probalby expecting me to be a lot different than I am, so im like a walking contradiction. Anyone had experience in a situation like this? (most likely not), i dont think theres much to do really.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Mercenary

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You just need to be confident in who you are. Do not worry about the internal poltics of the people around you.

Just as you fear these women might be sterotyping you, you are also guilty of doing the same to them. Give people some credit.

If you've learned nothing else from this site you should at least know that it is HOW a man carries himself rather than what a man looks like that will ultimately rule as the factor that determines his success with women.
 

FreeStyleZ

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Very true, but do you not think where people are from has something to do with the kinda guys they are attracted to? What I said wasnt to stereotype all girls, just was stating my experiences with them thus far.
 

Mercenary

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Yes, I know what you're saying. Some people will say that they prefer a certain "type" of person... or they don't have exposure to other cultures. If they aren't open to new things it's their loss.

What I meant when I mentioned sterotyping is just that these girls don't have to understand or know certain people of cultures in order to appreciate them.

I'm sure that for every one girl who might not give you the time of day because of your race, there are at least two who probably are attracted to you but might be intimidated because they assume that you might not give them the time of day...

The best way to combat this from happening is just to open up to people and give them less room to assume and generalize.

good luck
 

syemour

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HAhahaahhah, thats like my exact same situation. All I can say is just be persistent. All your doing when talking to the girls is separating the cool ones from the not cools ones. And from the looks of things it looks like there are gonna be a lot of not cool ones. F^ck em. Dont even let that bother you when your talking to them.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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FreeStyleZ

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lol yeah it sucks... im 6'4 and black so i look ghetto and attract girls who end up not vibing with my personality, then detract girls id probably get along with.
 

thejuice

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Pick a girl...
Hey, freestyle, where you from? Dude, dont worry about them not giving you a chance. You should show them why they should
 

FreeStyleZ

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I go to Frostburg State University which is in the western part of maryland. I'm actually from Silver Spring which is near DC...
 
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FreeStyleZ, I have the solution!

Tell these white girls that you are on the basketball team and are going to the pros soon - they'll be in your jock like babypowder!!!!:D
 
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Vigilante7

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Originally posted by PuertoRican_Lover
FreeStyleZ, I have the solution!

Tell these white girls that you are on the basketball team and are going to the pros soon - they'll be on your jock like babypowder!!!!:D
LMAO!

Yo freestylez, i cant tell you how to dress cause its whatever fits your style, but i know what you mean...i knew this one black kid who was SOOO WHITE that i called him Oreo for 2 years...

and when we went to the dance this nerd was getting approached SOLELY cause he is black

girls expect you to be 'ghetto' and 'hard', but fuk them and do what your comfortable with.....might be a contradiction but whatever suits you....

Its the same with the hood, so many people there have no personality whatsoever and they act hard....but then u see one person who has a great personality and different and they automatically right him off from being gutter......
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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DJ_Dork

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Freestylez, because you're in a predominantely white school and you're one of the few blacks there. You do not need to pick up or approach any girl. Trust me, Patience will win. Do whatever you're doing but appear more outgoing/athletic, masculine traits.. They will flock to you.
 

FreeStyleZ

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Well, just last night was great. Im thinking of making a field report but it'd turn out too long. Basically what happened though was a few girls came over, one from out of town who was a stripper and into black guys. I neg'd her constantly the whole night and everything on this website worked to perfection. Few examples are like when some AFC guys would tell her how pretty and beautiful she is, and she'd say "HOW AM I BEAUTIFUL???" id get loud and say "THATS WHAT IM TRYING TO FIGURE OUT MYSELF". Or when she'd grab my ass id tell her "this aint no petting zoo" (got this one from another source though)... or just ****y stuff like when she'd bend over and tell me i can grab her ass (she wanted me to) id tell her "no thats ok, wouldnt want to give u the pleasure of you having my hands on you". Made out and hooked up with her that night, was pretty damn fun.
 

FreeStyleZ

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About the friend of yours being an oreo. Yeah i know some of those guys.. but i dont really fall into that category. I have alot of black friends here too, but im just the type of person that can get along with anyone of any race.
 

ManOMan

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Freestyle

Just as a side note, I know ALOT of white HOT babes who have either been with black guys or talk about how they would like to experience it.

You need to get the idea out of your head that white women dont like black guys. Some don't, Most dont care
 

FreeStyleZ

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I never was trying to give off that impression as a "general" statement, i was just referring to my experience thus far and what it seems like from the girls ive talked to here. I mean how else can you interpret when a girl tells you "I woulda never guessed from your appearance that u'd be so nice". But like i said, last night was a good change around.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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TheInfamousCBear

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Originally posted by FreeStyleZ
Well first off im black at a prodominately white school. Alot of the white girls here had never seen any black guys back at home, so they dont really go for them. So my dilemma is that most of the girls that are attracted to me physically are black, but im not "ghetto" like they're used to so they don't go for my personality. With white girls they arent physically attracted to me and alot dont give ya a chance due to your looks. And if a girl is attracted to me physically then she's probalby expecting me to be a lot different than I am, so im like a walking contradiction. Anyone had experience in a situation like this? (most likely not), i dont think theres much to do really.
Thats just the way it is...We had this white guy we used to hang out with here, and everywhere we went, girls would be all over him, cause he was one of those boy bandish looking types, and most of the girls here go for that stuff...But if I go where there are alot of black folks, there isnt any problem getting play from black girls...Funny thing is that if a white dude went to a school thats mostly black, it would be hard as hell for him to get play, so this happens to everyone...But like people said, dont let it get you down, just keep doing your thing...
 

myfriendblu

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Free,
One of my best friends is a black cat just like you that grew up in a white area and has mostly white friends(my crew). However, he is quite the DJ and one hell of a decent guy, so he has no problem picking up girls. One thing I have taken notice to, that since he is well-spoken and more frat boy than urbab hip hop, alot of black girls don't really give him the time of the day. no biggie though. He is a hit with the latino girls, the asian girls and there are quite a few white girls out there that he hooks up with as well. I have also noticed that the couple of black girls, ther are only a few, that grew up around us in a predominatly white area, and are more intrained into white culture, and into him BIG TIME. If you ever meek another black girl in a similar situation as you, you will be quick to notice an instant attraction. Plus, there are plenty of white chiks out there to date. You just have to go out there and be a DJ and not fear rejection.
 
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