My father - by Krang! 
Figured I might share this with you guys since it was a real eyeopener for me.
My dad has always been the fun guy who everyone wants to hang out with and can talk to anyone anywhere and get them to like him. As I became older, my late teens and now early twenties I noticed that he could speak to girls I would only dream of approaching and strike up conversations and make them giggle and laugh. He will get discounts any time he buys something and when you go with him downtown people smile and say hi to him everywhere!
I mean my dad's an old fart - he is 60 years old and looks the part, bald head and dresses like something from the early 80's, no style or class whatsoever. His hair is usually in a mess and sometimes he wont shave for a couple of days if he isn't working. How can he instantly connect with just about anyone and have HB9's nervous and giggling like schoolgirls in his presence!?
I started conciously analyzing and observing him and I noticed some stuff I guess I've been blind to before because I known him all my life
1: He will smile at anyone he makes eye contact with
2: He will try to make eye contact with everyone he meets
3: He will always, and I really mean always start a conversation with people he meet about anything. It can be the guy at the gas station, the person in front of him in line at the supermarket or just the random girl that he meets in a doorway.
4: He always start conversations with a joke and a smile
5: On the rare occassion someone WONT speak to him he couldn't care less!
Hanging out with him is a freak show. He will neghit any random girl, like the other day we were grabbing some lunch at "mister sandwich" and the girl in front of us ordered a full size sub sandwich and my dad instantly goes "Nooo way! A small girl like you could never eat that - I'm three times your size and I can barely eat a half size AND I'M FAT!". The girl starts laughing and goes "It's not for me, it's for me boyfriend". My dad: "I can see why he would need to resupply his carbs with a girlfriend like you". Again she laughs and hits him playfully, my dad: "If I was a few years younger and didn't risk a heartattach..." She goes "aaaaw" and gives him a hug and kiss on the cheek!!! WHY is this HB9 hugging and kissing my 60-year old father and not me the 24-yeard old handsome guy!?!?
I really started thinking how can he pull stuff like that off without people being totally creeped out? The thing is he comes across as so genuine and honest you really get the feeling that he is a warm, ****y funny nice guy! And you know why? He is! It is so integrated into his personality that he doesn't have to act or use any techniques - he is just being himself. The strange thing is his jokes aren't really funny - he is no stand-up comedian, it's stuff ANYONE could think of from the top of their head, but he conveys such a strong confident and warm presence that people can't help smiling and laughing!
Well tough luck for me I figured, I just didn't get thoose genes. So I ask my dad "Have you always been so relaxed around people and confident speaking to anyone and everyone?" he goes "No way! I had a really bad stutter when I was younger and was so shy I couldn't speak to almost anyone afraid of making a fool out of myself!" - So how did you fix that I asked him? He tells me "Well my dream was always to join the airforce but they wont accept you if you stutter seeing that the radiocommunication gets messed up - but I wanted it so bad that I took all my savings and went to see a speech therapist for several months, doing all kinds of weird speech exercises in front of the mirror every night and eventually I had overcome my inhibition. I applied to the airforce and among over 800 applications I was one of the 16 accepted as a fighter pilot that year. That was an enormous confidence booster and I also found out that I was a damn good pilot. The friends in the airforce respected me for my skills and I found out that when I was relaxed and comfortable in a crowd I was a pretty funny guy to be with!"
Today my dad is a chief pilot instructor for a major airline company and trains around 100 new pilots every year. His job is to educate and evaluate people, they come to him to learn and ask for help - his outgoing attitude and huge confidence has become so integrated into his personality that I have a hard time imagining him ever having problems speaking to anyone!
So I guess what I'm trying to convey is that if the shy stuttering boy with no friends in school can become this alpha-male guy so can anyone. What was the factor that made him change - his dream. A silly childish dream that he refused to let go off even though it seemed impossible at first - and fullfilling that dream gave him the confidence to take charge over EVERY aspect of his life. He left the airforce for 30 years ago but he still is that ****y crazy funny fighter pilot guy, he is the person he wants to be and it made all aspects of his life skyrocket to new heights! What is YOUR dream and what will it take for YOU to reach it?
Figured I might share this with you guys since it was a real eyeopener for me.
My dad has always been the fun guy who everyone wants to hang out with and can talk to anyone anywhere and get them to like him. As I became older, my late teens and now early twenties I noticed that he could speak to girls I would only dream of approaching and strike up conversations and make them giggle and laugh. He will get discounts any time he buys something and when you go with him downtown people smile and say hi to him everywhere!
I mean my dad's an old fart - he is 60 years old and looks the part, bald head and dresses like something from the early 80's, no style or class whatsoever. His hair is usually in a mess and sometimes he wont shave for a couple of days if he isn't working. How can he instantly connect with just about anyone and have HB9's nervous and giggling like schoolgirls in his presence!?
I started conciously analyzing and observing him and I noticed some stuff I guess I've been blind to before because I known him all my life
1: He will smile at anyone he makes eye contact with
2: He will try to make eye contact with everyone he meets
3: He will always, and I really mean always start a conversation with people he meet about anything. It can be the guy at the gas station, the person in front of him in line at the supermarket or just the random girl that he meets in a doorway.
4: He always start conversations with a joke and a smile
5: On the rare occassion someone WONT speak to him he couldn't care less!
Hanging out with him is a freak show. He will neghit any random girl, like the other day we were grabbing some lunch at "mister sandwich" and the girl in front of us ordered a full size sub sandwich and my dad instantly goes "Nooo way! A small girl like you could never eat that - I'm three times your size and I can barely eat a half size AND I'M FAT!". The girl starts laughing and goes "It's not for me, it's for me boyfriend". My dad: "I can see why he would need to resupply his carbs with a girlfriend like you". Again she laughs and hits him playfully, my dad: "If I was a few years younger and didn't risk a heartattach..."
She goes "aaaaw" and gives him a hug and kiss on the cheek!!! WHY is this HB9 hugging and kissing my 60-year old father and not me the 24-yeard old handsome guy!?!?I really started thinking how can he pull stuff like that off without people being totally creeped out? The thing is he comes across as so genuine and honest you really get the feeling that he is a warm, ****y funny nice guy! And you know why? He is! It is so integrated into his personality that he doesn't have to act or use any techniques - he is just being himself. The strange thing is his jokes aren't really funny - he is no stand-up comedian, it's stuff ANYONE could think of from the top of their head, but he conveys such a strong confident and warm presence that people can't help smiling and laughing!
Well tough luck for me I figured, I just didn't get thoose genes. So I ask my dad "Have you always been so relaxed around people and confident speaking to anyone and everyone?" he goes "No way! I had a really bad stutter when I was younger and was so shy I couldn't speak to almost anyone afraid of making a fool out of myself!" - So how did you fix that I asked him? He tells me "Well my dream was always to join the airforce but they wont accept you if you stutter seeing that the radiocommunication gets messed up - but I wanted it so bad that I took all my savings and went to see a speech therapist for several months, doing all kinds of weird speech exercises in front of the mirror every night and eventually I had overcome my inhibition. I applied to the airforce and among over 800 applications I was one of the 16 accepted as a fighter pilot that year. That was an enormous confidence booster and I also found out that I was a damn good pilot. The friends in the airforce respected me for my skills and I found out that when I was relaxed and comfortable in a crowd I was a pretty funny guy to be with!"
Today my dad is a chief pilot instructor for a major airline company and trains around 100 new pilots every year. His job is to educate and evaluate people, they come to him to learn and ask for help - his outgoing attitude and huge confidence has become so integrated into his personality that I have a hard time imagining him ever having problems speaking to anyone!
So I guess what I'm trying to convey is that if the shy stuttering boy with no friends in school can become this alpha-male guy so can anyone. What was the factor that made him change - his dream. A silly childish dream that he refused to let go off even though it seemed impossible at first - and fullfilling that dream gave him the confidence to take charge over EVERY aspect of his life. He left the airforce for 30 years ago but he still is that ****y crazy funny fighter pilot guy, he is the person he wants to be and it made all aspects of his life skyrocket to new heights! What is YOUR dream and what will it take for YOU to reach it?