"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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My current situation...

SoulAngel

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Ok, this my first time in THIS forum. I've always liked this forum for a long time so I decided to tell a story about a situation of mine....^^:;

The girl's name has been changed to [Girl] for privacy sakes^^;;


About 2 1/2 years ago in late august of 2001 I met a girl in my art class named [Girl]. At that point i had secretly admired her then at some point in September i then showed visible signs that i liked her. Then when my birthday came on the 13th, she had made me a cake and i loved it very much. Then during that month we were best friends then i had asked her to be my girlfriend soon after. We had so much in common and we got along really good... we really clicked! We were doing excellent for she is my first real and steady
girlfriend even today. We had encountered some situations and problems but we did do ok on most of them. One thing that would end up later hurting the relationship was that i wanted us to have sex. Her parents wouldn't allow such a thing for her age, but i didn't know any better at that time...i just wanted that from her. It wasn't the only thing on my mind but i had felt that that would strengthen our love. During the summer of 2003 we had officalily broke up because of that. I took it hard like i was natually supposed to since we had been together for a very long time in my mind, 2 and a half years to be
exact. I didn't want to fully let go of her so i still wanted to be her friend. Today as of December 2004, we are extremely great friends. Before the New Year i had moved to another part of the state but i
was still able to reach her by car and hang out and i was doing just that.


Now that i have given you a good picture of us my question is this;
I had and still do really care about [Girl]. Her personality was unique to me, and i loved her a lot and very much respect her and i still do today. I am now in Florida and have been down here for about a half a year now. I have this
feeling inside me of not wanting to fully let go of her. I know how to move on with my life and not be obsessed with her too much like i used to be. My mom says that i should try to not think about [Girl] so much and go on and try to find other girls. But that is just it...i don't want to let go of a love that i had even though we had broken up. During the times we were together after the breakup and before I had moved, sometimes she would hold my hand and allow me to kiss her on the cheek when i leave her house and she hugs me for a while. She knows what i'm feeling. I know that we both feel that since i'm about to move somewhere very far...that we start to realize how
much we really cared for about each other. We are not going to physically see each other again and i feel that i'm going to lose someone really important in my life that could possibly be with in the future. I try to keep in touch of her now and then and she said that she visit me whenever she had the chance. Today as of December, we don't talk very much as in sending emails...she is in college and she is busy and i'm trying to keep busy and continue working on my portfolios for college.

At one point i really cared about this girl and even though we broke up, she still wanted to be best friends and i also wanted that. I just have the feeling that i'm not going to meet another girl as fantastic as [Girl] like that again. I understand that i should accept the fact that we will be distanced...but i just want to keep thinking about a future with me and [Girl]. I keep having the feeling that there was so much potential in our relationship if i hadn't screwed it up by not accepting no for an answer.

What does anyone suggest I should do?

After reading my own post...I might be coming off as a noob here. :rolleyes: but i'd love to hear from the intelligent minds out there about this.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Vincent

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Originally posted by SoulAngel
^^;;
What the hell is that?




You sir, are the shinning example of an AFC.

I direly suggest you read the bible, and get over that slut.
 

GivNothingKev

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I'm not gonna argue, you are pretty much AFC material, but if no one ever learned otherwise, just about every guy would be. Anyway, I haven't been with a girl for 2 1/2 years ever, but I can understand. Especially since you went out with her when you were younger, plus since she was your first, you got extremely attached. When I broke up with my first gf, it was really hard for me to imagine myself with anyone else. But what you really need to do is go read more stuff. Read the Bible about losing oneitis and read more posts and articles. Then just find other girls and you'll get you're mind off of her. Picture yourself with other girls. You might think she was great and really loved you untill you think about it a little bit..

Then you'll realize that her saying her parents "wouldn't allow it" was a TOTAL bullsh!t excuse not to have sex. If she liked you enough, she would have just done it, it's not like she would have had to tell her parents.

Just read the Bible and go test the waters. You'll most likely find yourself MUCH more satisfied.
 

i am me

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I would do what he said /\ and try to get over her. Try as hard as you can to get with another girl and hopefully, this first girl might get jealous. Believe me, they won't admit it, but everyone gets jealous when you see your ex with someone else...
 

SoulAngel

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GivNothingKev & i am me, thank you very much for the honest and positive replies. I've been doing good so far without her and I have kept my mind on other events. I shall look over the Bible some more.

Once again, thank you. Your replies are very much apperiacted
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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