my biggest AFC moment - need advice

[dice]

okay so I've been seducing this girl I work with for awhile, when she first started all the guys were hitting on her and I just kept my cool and let them sink themselves which they did. I talked to her a few times on the phone and she was always hanging out with guys or an ex she says is just a friend now, again, I kept my cool and didn't let her think for one second I was threatened. Then we were supposed to hangout a few days ago and I call her up and she says shes with her ex and she's sorry she didn't think shed be hanging out with him that long. I didn't answer my phone for the next week until today. I was a complete **** to her pretending I didn't want anything to do with her, she couldnt figure out why i was acting that way. And then I slipped..

I felt bad about telling her I was too hot for her and such, so I decided to be honest. I dont know if its because I was fed up with her or that I just wanted to see how she felt, but I told her I like her alot and want to be more than friends but that I was backing off because I wanted to save us the grief that would occur if we got together (shes like a female DJ, always courting more than one guy). As soon as i texted her the message I instantly felt the power and respect I had gained with her vanish and I knew i had fukd up. She replied "that makes me sad" and i asked y with no response.

I learned ALOT from this.. always remain the "great catch" no matter what, NEVER let down ur defenses, she must always be chasing you not vice versa. Always keep your mystery.

My question is, is there anyway to recover from this? I even thought about being like HAHA JUST KIDDING but thatd be stupid. My plan is to just not call her until she calls me and take it from there. Any advice would be helpful.

 

[SDBmania]

Hmm. I guess I'm not much help on this one. I'd say you next time this happens, you should just say you were busy.

However, I usually like to tell girls if I have a crush on them within a short time(that is if I really do have a crush on them). I like to get it out in the open right away, so I know what to do next. I don't like having a crush on a girl for too long, because it makes me feel like I'm stalling.

In your case, I'd say most of the DJs here would tell you to ignore for a while and see if she calls you. You could call her in a week or so, but it's probably best to let her make the next move. She knows you are interested, so let her initiate next.

 

[tmpgstx]

Girls like this you treat like crap. They don't have alot in the self-esteem department. If you treat them good, they feel they're undeserving of it so in essence they cling to someone who treats them poorly.

Why would you even want a girl like this? If you just want ONS her, that's one thing. To have a relationship with her would be hell Dawg - no kidding. You'd have to put up with her ex still getting his share of that pie though he's not even officially her bf anymore. You'd have to put up with other guys she'd be courting as you said. You know this girl won't be exlcusive. Don't waste your time.

 

[dice]

she called me last night and asked me if i still wanted to be her friend, i said "ya ill be your friend but im kinda busy now ttyl" she said "call me whenever"... should i be her friend or should i back away ??

btw ya im just looking for a f*** buddy

 

[marceldwayne]

next time something stupid like that happens remember that text messaging DOES NOT COUNT as communication.

i wish u had posted this sooner cuz i would have told you to simply tell her that a friend of urs by the name of Sarah texted that to her on ur phone as a stupid sarcastic joke to get a reaction out of her. Say that this friend of urs is obsessed with u and does stupid **** like this all the time. (for some reason sayinga crazy obssesed stalker did something works like a charm!!)

this would: 1. make it look like ur above her
2. make it look like u were wit a hot girl anyway.
3. SAVE YOUR ASS!!!!

lieing is the best weapon

 

[n00bPimp]

At least you recognize this was a bad choice, its a step in the right direction.

 

[brocollie]

i have the same experience. wrote the same thing and i absolutely agree with u to remain a great catch no matter what. theres no way back m8, its fooked up and she'll never look at u in the same light as she looked at u before. Im totally cold and even ignoring the girl today. I dont give a fvck, she's a bi*ch anyways. :S