"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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My approaches so far...

mrswabe

Don Juan
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Hi everyone,

Here are the approaches I've done in the past six months. They are only quite a few. I know that I have to approach some more in order to 'up' my game.

But before I do that, I will post these previous approaches in order to get some feedback from all of you.

Here they are, as far as I can recall. Note that these were translated from my native language.

Approach 1
This girl about an 8, petite and a dancer figure. 5 years younger than me. She's 17 and I'm 22.

When I first made eye contact with this girl she was sticking her tongue out to me in a childish way, I was surprised she dared to do that. :eek:

I approached her later in that evening -- unintentionally. In my evening class we had a surprise test and I did not have any paper. The bookstore was closed, so I've been asking everyone in the corridors to give me some paper.

Then there was her.

Swabe: Hey, do you have any paper?
Girl: (surprised) I'll look in my bag.

( Thank God! She had some paper. :D )
Swabe: Thank God you have some paper! Can I borrow one from you?
Girl: I can't let you borrow one but I can give one to you. ( wise ass )
Swabe: Well, thank you very much. Your very kind. Whats your name?
Girl: Its zzzzzz
Swabe: zzzzzz, thank you for the paper. I have to go now to my test. I'll be seeing you around.

( I felt that I did not have time to get the proper close since I had to hurry for my test. )


Approach 2
This girl a 9, has been giving eye contact and smiles some days before my approach. I finally got the courage to approach her and here it goes...

We meet at the lobby in our school.
I smiled at her and she smiled back.

Swabe: Hi! I noticed that you don't wear your school uniform.
Girl: Yes, thats because I am cross-enrolling at xxx university.

( fluff talk about her situation and stuff )

Girl: What's your name?
Swabe: It's Swabe, and yours?
Girl: Its zzzz.

Girl: I think I saw you before. Weren't you an accountancy student before?
Swabe: Yes, but then I've changed to engineering.
Girl: Oh! so that is why you look familiar.

( We walked together outside the school building. At this time, I was turning my head about to look for my friends. I was afraid that they would be teasing me. :rolleyes:
I said goodbye to her but I did not ask for her number.
I know now from reading here that I should have asked for it.
)

I will be posting some more... but right now I have to study for a test.
Guys, I would really appreciate your critiques and comments and any suggestions.
Bye for now.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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L777

Master Don Juan
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hey man, sound like xxx and xxx are/were into you. I reckon you just need to get a lil better at closing, but good job anyway!!
 

wheelin&dealin

Master Don Juan
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Good work Mr Swabe!

The next step is to ask for the girls number at the end of any conversation. For example, when you talk to a girl for a few minutes, say "Why don't you write down your number and we'll go do something sometime?" Make this automatic, so that when you are chatting up any girl you always end the conversation with it.

I definitely think you would benefit from approaching more women. Practice by starting up conversations with anyone, guy, girl, ugly, hot, old, deaf... it doesn't matter. This will improve your conversation skills and will make you more comfortable when talking to women.
 

lets_do_this

Don Juan
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I am also from the Philippines, I sent you a PM. Sarge with me if you are in my vicinity. :)
 

Sapiens

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Talagan talaga, maraming ng pinoy dito. Although hindi ng pinoy ako. LOL

Maraming sewrte, kaibigan!

-Sapiens
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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lets_do_this

Don Juan
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Originally posted by Sapiens
Talagan talaga, maraming ng pinoy dito. Although hindi ng pinoy ako. LOL

Maraming sewrte, kaibigan!

-Sapiens
Cool, Sapiens. I've read alot of your post ever since i've been reading here at so suave.

I have learned much about your posts, honestly.

I might need help. Let's converse.

Do you have yahoo messenger? PM me. :)
 

mrswabe

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I never have thought that sapiens was a filipino.

Latest Approach

Ok. It's 2AM as I am posting now.

Just came from a resto-bar. A friend of mine was celebrating his birthday. We were a group of ten, composed of guys and their GFs.

One of my friends knew the owner's daughter. She approached us together with a friend of hers who was a Filipino-Chinese chick HB8.

I tried to be ****y & funny to her.
I said to her: "Why don't you come here in front of us and introduce yourself, as if you were in an elementary class."

My friends were laughing. Aparrently there was no reaction from her. So I leave it at that.

I've noticed that C+F does not work very well here. Or maybe I'm just doing it all wrong.

What do you think?
 

NumenMalefic

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Originally posted by mrswabe

I tried to be ****y & funny to her.
I said to her: "Why don't you come here in front of us and introduce yourself, as if you were in an elementary class."

What do you think?
u insulted her dumbass

that's not c+f

you already have ur head up ur ass with pride.

u should have said: "Grace us with your presense you highness, share ur name with us."

whatever
 

lets_do_this

Don Juan
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Originally posted by mrswabe
I never have thought that sapiens was a filipino.

Latest Approach

Ok. It's 2AM as I am posting now.

Just came from a resto-bar. A friend of mine was celebrating his birthday. We were a group of ten, composed of guys and their GFs.

One of my friends knew the owner's daughter. She approached us together with a friend of hers who was a Filipino-Chinese chick HB8.

I tried to be ****y & funny to her.
I said to her: "Why don't you come here in front of us and introduce yourself, as if you were in an elementary class."

My friends were laughing. Aparrently there was no reaction from her. So I leave it at that.

I've noticed that C+F does not work very well here. Or maybe I'm just doing it all wrong.

What do you think?
I'm from the Philippines, man. C+F Works wonders. You did it all wrong.

You got PM.
 

mrswabe

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Thats a good line. Perhaps I could use that in the future.

Yes. In retrospect, I find that what I did was insulting.
I was trying too hard to please everyone. ( The girl and the gang. ) I fouled it up.

I guess there is a very fine line between C+F and an insult.

Next time, I'll be more conservative with my comments.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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mrswabe

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u should have said: "Grace us with your presense you highness, share ur name with us."
Thats a good line. Perhaps I could use that in the future.

Yes. In retrospect, I find that what I did was insulting.
I was trying too hard to please everyone. ( The girl and the gang. ) I fouled it up.

I guess there is a very fine line between C+F and an insult.

Next time, I'll be more conservative with my comments.
 
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