My anxiety

[kk2004]

As I get wiser and perhaps more confident, so I would like to believe, I am starting to get a little annoyed and even bothered by my anxiety. Know I have tried to find out what some of the things that trigger my anxiety, when I am around certain things or when certain things happen around me, I tend to feel anxiety and tension and my breathing becomes irregular and my blood pressure goes up. Now what this has to do with being a Don Juan is that it makes certain situations which require you to do certain things harder and difficult then they have to be, since I'll start to feel anxiety at the wrong times and it feels like an automatic response, probably triggered by wrong ideas and wrong self talk.

This anxiety gets in the way of me being able to relax and feel comfortable. A must have to be a Don Juan.

Some of the triggers which I believe set off my anxiety.

1)Being in Crowed Places (Malls, booksotres, downtown streets...) (Anxiety gets worse if I am in a place where the people most are in my age group 19-21..Im 19) (Clubs produce alot of anxiety)

2)Making eye contact with or sitting next to Attractive Females (The prettier they are the worse the anxiety) (thinking about talking to them produces alot of anxiety, enough to make me not talk to her)

3)Walking on the Street doesnt produce as much as anxiety as the two above but I still feel I am more conscience and aware of my actions then I should be.

Where does this anxiety come from?
How can I get rid of it?

Ive tried the bootcamp but the saying HI to strangers is quite anxiety producing in itself so its hard to get started on that. Maybe a Bootcamp -Lite if there is one.

 

[DonJuanMonk]

Try to look at it from a 3rd person point of view.... then breathe out slowly from your belly not through your chest... Do this 10 times, Move slower do things slower - your body is in a "flight" mode as it wants to escape the crowd/tension - Approach slower and you will begin to see things clearly.

That's my method and I have huge anxiety and I hate crowds. I just put up with it.

 

[kk2004]

ic

Its very annoying though and makes approaching and talking and feeling confident very hard.

 

[LionOne]

Now that I look at it, for me anxiety was the matter of not really knowing what to say or to do in some situations. It was confusing, I wasn't in charge of my own life and felt very anxious in many situations.

Before I had any skills I did nothing.

Then I happened to discover the DYD-ebook and it changed my perception to world. I started to improve myself and study all the material. I gained enough skills to actually see what's going on in the social situations. At the same time I met some cool new friends and learned much from their frame.

After I got some skills I did what I could.

It was a huge amount of work to get my fuked up inner game together and to really understand all the concepts. Now I don't feel anxious anymore as I *know* that I can handle any situation.

The most important lesson I learned from the cool friends: Relax. To relax properly I had to learn enough skills to make me feel comfortable. When you relax you become more aware of your surroundings and sort of get in rapport with yourself.

Now that I can relax I do what I want.

Visualisation is a good tool to get over anxiety. I view it as a tool to install new behavior. Before you go to sleep make a few scenarios in your mind of the situations that makes you feel anxious. Ask yourself, what is that which makes me feel uncomfortable in this situation, and then visualize yourself being relaxed and doing everything cool.

 

[roy01]

My strategy for dealing with approach anxiety has been to first brainstorm some memories that totally crack me up before even going out to approach. These funny memories can be anything - events earlier in your life, something you saw on TV or heard on the radio, etc.. Doesn't work every time but I've noticed a greater number of approaches every week since I started doing this.

Now I need to think of some way to keep the tension away when I'm talking with women. I often get nervous and frustrated when I run out of things to say and really don't like using any canned material. I cannot really use the previous "trick" for approach anxiety here because it requires me to take a "time out" by taking a deep breath and closing my eyes before thinking of something funny; that'll be too awkward and makes my nervousness quite obvious.

 

[Bloke]

This has close to NOTHING got to do with women

See a doctor about it, my brother & sister suffered from these panic attacks as well.