"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Music choice affecting Betaness?

T

TheVoyager

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Do you guys think that the type of music that you listen to can affect how you behave? I am just curious as to what you guys think.

Back in highschool, I was such a beta, I would let people walk over me. I thought that being nice was the way to get girls which was not the case at all (surprise surprise). During this time, my favorite choice of music was like pop and alternative songs that were mostly about love, falling in love, falling out of love, well you get the point....

These days I do enjoy my plurred out trance however when I workout i like listening to much harder, faster trance and house music. It really gets me in the zone.

What do u guys think? Does the music you guys listen to affect how you behave?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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logicallefty

logicallefty

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If sappy AFC love songs are your thing I prolly wouldn't be bragging that to a woman you hope to get with later. I think you are pretty safe with top-40, 80s, rap/hip-hop, metal, classic rock, perhaps even some country so long as it's not sappy country.

I personally think there is something behind the music people listen to. This is just my own observation observing people around my own age, 40. Nothing more than my observation and opinion:

- Top 40 listeners: Just want to go with the flow and times, and maybe be "cool" with their kids

- Country listeners: Folks who have a lot of past scars in their life and want to move on and not have the same life they once did

- 80s listeners: People who are stressed out now and want to go back and remember easier and better times (oh and they were!!)

- Rap/hip hop listeners: People who want to go against the grain and not be goodie two-shoes all the time

- Sappy love song listeners: People who want love in their life or cant get over someone in the past

- Classic rock listeners: People who used to party and maybe smoke weed and miss the partying days

- Metal listeners: People who still like like to party like they did when they are younger

Again, just my take from watching and "listening" to people :D
 
ImTheDoubleGreatest!

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

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It definitely does. How else are people able to 'vibe' to the music like they do? Because it makes them feel like they can relate to it.

There is a strange effect on the human mind whenever we hear, feel, or just sense a rhythm in general. Ever heard of the 'runner's high'? It occurs whenever you stay in constant motion in a constant rhythm for a long time. Whenever you hear the pounding of your feet on the ground in the same exact rhythm for an extended period of time, you get into this trance, a focused state of mind that will allow you to keep on running for hours on end. And nothing really enters your consciousness because of that focus. But it can drift into your subconscious the same way how some studies claim that you can learn while sleeping (if you play an audio at night and fall asleep while still listening to it, you can retain that knowledge when you wake up without having actually studied it prior).

It's just a theory/idea though. I could be totally off so don't go getting mad at me if someone proves me wrong. These are just MY beliefs.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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FairShake

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Absolutely. Music is emotion both yours and the artist's.

However, music made by pansies is usually better than that made by (c)rappers, butt metalheads, and douche ravers.

So I prefer to listen to music made by people with vocal and instrumental talent and something to say that I can actually understand.

Edit: Before people get hurt I do like trance. But that's the nerdy side of EDM so it's a little beta.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Between_The_Lines

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Definitely.

I know it's an oldie, but I came across Bobby Caldwell - What You Won't Do For Love (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gru4IfbKlfU) at the most opportune moment, Summer/Fall of 2013, at the height of my furious determination to win back my ex, and my god, what beta-reeking lyrics, what beta-enabling lyrics. I'd listen to it over and over and over, each time thinking to myself "this is exactly my situation - EXACTLY!!!", sinking deeper into a trance-like state of absolute betaness with each repetition.

How I projected the lyrics back on to me and what was really taking place in bold


I guess you wonder where I've been (as if she actually gave a fvck)
I searched to find the love within (my way of rationalizing how I yielded completely to an inner craving for co-dependent expression)
I came back to let you know
Got a thing for you ("thing"? no, ONEITUS... lyrics ought to read "Got ONEITUS for you, and I can't let go")
And I can't let go (I used those exact words the first time she let me know that this little chase of mine to get her back wasn't going to amount to anything)
My friends wonder what is wrong with me (Precisely. That's all I could talk about back then - HER HER HER. How annoying!!)
Well I'm in a daze from your love you see (there's that oneitus again, fvcking sh1t up as per usual! Sighhh...)
I came back to let you know
Got a thing for you
And I can't let go
Some people go around the world for love
And they may never find what they dream of
What you won't do, do for love (Ughhh)
You tried everything (double ughhh)
But you don't give up (double ughhh to the fifty-eighth power)


Gross. I feel like I need to take consecutive showers now. Still love the song though. Strange..
 
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