"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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mother in law issues

*******

Don Juan
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My mother in law doesn't talk to me except to say hi/bye. We have never had a decent conversation, yet she feels like she knows me like the back of her hand. When im not there she tells my girlfriend how im a bad guy and i only want to take advantage of her (even though we screwed months ago). She thinks i simply don't give a ****. She doesn't like me to say the least, even though she doesn't show it in person. Normally i wouldn't give a fvck, but this situation is a little different because my GF lives with her mother.

Im going to pay a visit this friday to see what's up. ANy thoughts?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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TONYMONTANA523

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Trust me dont get into it with her mother. Then that will give her an excuse for her to even talk more crap about you. Win her with kindness and manners.
 

Bussey

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Touch her inappropriately.

Well, if only by accident, and only if she's worth touching.

No experience with marriage.... so I'd simply say to demonstrate that you care a lot about your wife? Around the Outlaws, be an AFC lol.

I don't know, I don't think I should have posted at all. I just like seeing... my... voice.
 

MAVER1CK

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Let me guess you dress like a thug, and speak ebonics.

Listen, all you need to do is dress professionally, and speak with a decent vocab. Make her mother think you are a business man who will acheive many things.

which, you probably wont, but thats ok. Fake it if you dont make it!
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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*******

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^^^ you are an idiot. You are making WAY too many assumptions. You don't know how i dress or talk and that im a bussiness major. So i WILL acheive big things and i don't have to fake it.
 

*******

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no. But people i grew up with consider the G/Fs mother the MIL regardless of marrige plans.
 

DarkTrick

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If her opinion is that important to you, then my suggestions follow:

Be a mature man around her, meaning be a gentleman in all respects.

Dress appropriately, even a bit over what's necessary.

Certainly dont curse at all, and dial back on the slang. Speak like your at a job interview - think about what you say before you say it. And speak quietly, never raise your voice for any reason.

Watch your behaviour, even the trifles, towards your GF (as this is what is probably generating the MIL's opinion). Respectful and reserved, all things (esp yourself) under control.

No inappropriate touching of the GF, or verbal cues. MIL's internally wince at this sht.

That said, dont overdue it. The MIL's built in bullsht detector that all women come with as standard equipment will red-line if it seems like this is all for show. Also, consider if the above is a huge departure from your normal behaviour, that in itself will generate suspicion.

Or, just be yourself and let the cards fall where they may. Guess it depends on your personal sense of self, how important the MIL's opinion really is to you, and how much static the GF takes for it (which she'll ultimately reflect in your direction) when you're not present.
 

MacAvoy

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future dj said:
how is she your MIL? are you and her even engaged?
She is not his mother in law. He is dreaming in technicolor

He is putting this women that he just met on a pedastool and thinking already that she is going to be his MIL.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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mrRuckus

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you realize if the mother sucks the daughter will most likely end up sucking too?

don't turn that into a joke.
 

*******

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MacAvoy said:
She is not his mother in law. He is dreaming in technicolor

He is putting this women that he just met on a pedastool and thinking already that she is going to be his MIL.
I guess you don't know how to read. MIL doesn't mean marriage, even my GF calls her my MIL and we are not engage. I guess it's a spanish thing.
 
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