Most people meet through school/work/friends/etc

[Infinity]

Most people in the world know the people they know because of some common activity, whether it be school, work, clubs, or mutual friends. This applies to the dating world as well. Personally, I think it sucks and minimizes your chances of meeting someone you'd really click with. It's like you resign yourself to whatever life brings you instead of going out and getting what you want from life. This is why I'm so obsessed with learning and becoming skilled at cold approaches...so I can meet people I would never otherwise meet.

I want your thoughts on two issues regarding this.

a. Do you think my thesis is true?

b. What do you think the implications of this thesis are? Are you satisfied only meeting the people through said methods or do you seek/desire spontaneous interactions as well?

Interested to hear what you guys think about this...

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Well, there is something to be said for meeting people through work, school, mutual friends, etc. And that is that when you meet someone in this way, you know that you already have at least one major thing in common with them.

That isn't to say that you shouldn't meet people in other ways, but for example, if some friends of yours introduce you to a girl, you know things about her before she even opens her mouth to talk. There are assumptions that you can make about her based on the fact that she's friends with people that you're friends with. Based on that, you know that you're more likely to have things in common with her and your chances of hitting it off with a girl that you meet in this way is statistically much higher than just a random girl you meet in a bar, club, mall, etc.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

I meet people through others but I always chose who to chase - i usually never chase a girl i met through others because i am not attracted to them - i am open to all but my efforts are usually always directed at cold aproaches because only i know what i truly want - in terms of looks and attraction.

 

[Kineti[C]harm]

Meeting people via other people you know is good because it usually gives you social rapport.

I was at a party yesterday and I introduced myself to some girls and AGAIN as I've gotten on diff parties around on my uni I got the response "Oh YOU'RE xxxxx, I've heard about you" and she smiled and got all game.

If you want to meet new people the best way is just to do random approaches, just spontaneously like at clubs or supermarkets or whatever.

 

[squirrels]

Meeting people through other people is one good way to network. It generates instant rapport, since your knowing the person introducing you means right away that she (assuming it's a woman/romantic prospect you're meeting) doesn't have to worry as much about you being some random psycho.

Even having friends around you (social proof) in a foreign situation helps. That's why it's so much harder to pick up women at a club ALONE than out with friends. Not so much because of the c*ck-block effect, but because if you're out alone, you don't have anyone who'll vouch for your character by hanging out with you.

You know what I think'd be good for you? Get a part-time job between classes, something that forces you to talk to people. It won't help you overcome your fear of approaching people of your own volition, but at least you'll develop some social skills and discover that most people won't reject you/hate you. And those that do...

...well, f'k them.

(btw dude, stop being a baby and unblock me.)